Like everyone else on this forum, I go on what you post.

So all the dozens of posts about her (under your previous name too). So you've posted repeatedly about her and how many times you contacted her. And how she told you to leave her alone. And the gifts you sent that she didn't want. And the messages you sent that she didn't want. On her birthday when you didn't want to hear people saying not to.. and you still did.

And another time you sent her a message saying how sad and desperate you felt (even after so many times she'd told you to leave her alone) and you came on here saying she was a cold-hearted ***** that didn't deserve you.

A *****? Not responding to someone she begged to leave her alone?

I go on what people post and their history on sites. It isn't me being a ***** if I actually respond to what they post.

I believe in LOA but i'm not an airy fairy ignore reality person when the reality is that someone is being treated badly, harrassed or abused.

Or if the reality is that someone is ignoring their problems fixating on someone as the answer.

Because she isn't. You are all over these forums talking about how you 'love' her and she's such a big part of your life.

She isn't - you've had no contact for years so she isn't a part of your life in any way. But she's a part of your consciousness in an obsessive way, oh if she just loved me things would be better?

I don't think they would.

If you stop trying 'to get her back' what will you do? What will your focus be? How will you keep a 'high vibe' if it isn't to get her? Who will you be and what do you want?

Honestly, it's not normal to spend years focusing on someone that said they don't want you. It just isn't. Figure out what you're ignoring by focusing on that.

I'm not being a *****, I just don't think the 'anything is possible huh guys?' that you seem to take from these forums (even though it's not always what people said) is good for you in any way. Or good for the woman youre focused on.

Look at it from her point of view - you wrecked her life for a while. You've admitted that.

You harassed her with hundreds of messages and frightened her and I guarantee she looked over her shoulder every day for months to see if you were there.

When someone harasses you it makes you frightened of your 'phone and social media which should be fun things to use and keep in touch with people. It makes you worried to go out in case they're there.

So you're in your own home where you should feel safe and you don't because message after message of varying degrees of emotional instability are coming through. Veering from I love you to you're a horrible person and all in between and when they pretend none of this ever happened and just send a friendly message of 'hey I saw this today' or 'I miss you' it's even more frightening because it's like they expect you to forget everything that happened before or they're so mentally unwell they don't remember it or don't think it matters. Especially if they've been quiet for a while and you think they've moved on and you've relaxed a bit.

And blocking them doesn't help that much because you're still worried about what they're saying.

I can't speak for the woman you're talking about but the above is probably how she felt. I can only speak for me and say that I would never be with the man that did that to me. Never.

And years later he STILL thought he loved me and we were meant to be together and he probably still does. We never were meant to be together and he never loved me though I know he thinks he does but that isn't love, it's obsession.

If we were meant to be together- i'd be there. I'm not.

Maybe have a think about what you're 'putting out' on here?

There always seem to be a lot of people that you think are making assumptions.

Stop contacting him. Stop seeing him. Stop devoting any energy to him. You don't have to explain anything to him or tell him anything or ask him anything.

I know you want him but all you say about him and his behaviour makes him sound like an A* manipulative, selfish game playing asshole to be honest and you're so caught up in it that you can't see the wood for the trees.

You deserve more than that.

I think letting go and moving on is at the moment, realistically the only way that it may happen.

You've tried really hard for soooo long and to me, it just seems to be going in the opposite direction. The only thing you haven't tried so far is really letting go and moving on.

It has to be worth a try. I think you deserve more than the crumbs this guy is giving you and I know you want him and I don't want to judge but he doesn't seem like a nice person right now. Either in regards to you OR his GF.