RAPISTS! What in the world are you talking about?

Justaspeckintheuniverse wrote:

Have fun and forget about someone who ghosts you. They ALL want you back eventually. Even the loser. And you're gonna attract a LOT of creepy losers. It is scary if you hate attention. A lot of them are rapists. Never accept gifts from a rapist.

So happy for you

This is great advice.

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

YesIWILL wrote:

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

I really wish you didn't allow her to be the determiner of whether you are happy or not. 

Me too. I mean, I can be happy without her... but not "full" without her, if that makes sense. There are days I feel AMAZING, in fact, most days I do. I have GREAT days... but it doesn't feel "right" or "complete" without her there. It gives me like a somewhat empty feeling of incompleteness. It's just not something I can help. I'm missing her. Oh well, though. Thanks for the support, PF. You're always so kind

This about being full - it's not true. I thought the same about someone once and it passed but only when I made the decision he was not going to influence my life anymore. It took time but I had to make that decision and stick to it. I had to accept he didn't want to be with me. I don't want to be with him now and I would still be happy to be friends but now there are others in my life I value and prefer above him. A lot of wanting that guy stemmed from the fact I wanted not to be a failure and not succeeding with him, in my mind, made me one. That isn't true. He lives 300 miles away from me now and if we reconnected maybe that would be good maybe, who knows. But I was like you.

You've two choices. Carry on in this way and be like this for the foreseeable future, wrecking your life - you only have one! - over this person, and stagnate or get worse. It won't get better.

Or accept you're not with her but your life is worth more than restricting yourself to her and change it. Look at yourself, how you react in relationships and with others. I did. It was all about my childhood with me and one particular guy when I was 18 treating me badly. Do the inner work.

You don't know what the future may hold for you. You don't have to go out on dates if you don't want to. Not until you're ready and not using it as a sticky plaster.

Holy crap this is so great! I never saw this PST but will start this tomorrow. Thanks so very much for this

Thanks.