Cherished wrote:

mayank.sharma2993 wrote:

hi cherished...ur olf posts keep bumping up and they are a blessing...frankly telling...when a question pokes in my mind..i randomly open up any of ur posts and find that the answer to my question lies in that vrry same post only...i m all thankful to god and u for the most awesome guidance is available to  me..guiding me to janvi...my love....
cherished while you were all thinking to do possibly everything to get your guy back...you discovered self love...even at that moment did you have thoughts abt guy...like when i mgetting him back..or yes..this path is getting me to him...



i ll request you to kindly share with us something that tells us all that while doing all this...how did you get your back to u...what goals..desires were in u mind and how things manifested..

 
Yes of course I had thoughts about my guy- but I had quite a journey that I needed to take on my own first. I actually learnt to enjoy the power of standing alone for some time, and finding my own bliss. I am a mommy and I needed to put my babies first for a little while- I had no option but to be strong for them. It feels incredible to learn that YES you can do it on your own. And that actually you are NEVER alone. As I learnt to meditate and practice yoga I felt a peace and bliss that I've never before experienced. And as I practiced gratitude and love for MYSELF, I realised what a wonderful person I am. And I began to see EVERYONE as wonderful. My guy kind of had to take a back-seat, because I was seriously busy becoming ME for the first time. Yes I wanted him, but I wasn't NEEDING him or fearing I'd die without him.. In fact, the prospect of someone even BETTER than him began to excite me!

I occasionally still visualised us together, and it felt amazing. I became less concerned with him in my day-to-day life. My focus was purely on MY alignment. That's it. My mission was to get outrageously happy each day. And to let go of the little stuff. And most of the big stuff too! To laugh at my frustrations. To applaud my tiny wins! To eagerly anticipate the glorious ways the universe might surprise me each day! I wanted to improve my work, and I did. I wanted to increase my wealth, and I did. I wanted to be a superhero mommy for my babies- and I am! I wanted to build the best body of my life- a temple in which my soul could reside.. And I have! All of those things took lots of creative focus and lots of inspired action!

With a focus on becoming the very best version of you, you drop the neediness out of your vibration. It ceases to exist. When your life is rich and abundant with ideas and accomplishments you are wanting to tick off your bucket list, YOU only really have time for YOU! And that is a very attractive vibration. When I finally flipped that switch between NEEDING and DESIRING, my guy came back fast. And when he came back, at first I stood in utter amazement. But it quickly felt totally natural and expected. LOA helps with that. I have no doubt in my mind whatsoever that all of you can reunite with your loved. There is no distance, no issue, no drama, no obstacle bigger than the force of true love. When you learn to build yourself from the ground up, you appreciate how far you've come. You feel truly grateful for the opportunity. And you experience the "self love" that everyone is chasing. The moment I tapped into it, my guy was right back. When I could feel that magical, unconditional love for myself and for him, it was like the floodgates opened, and we reunited on a level of love and adoration that transcended anything I've ever experienced before.

 

well this will be on the top of question list of soo many i m sure but i would like to lighten this up cherished...


when you say so that when u understand to  differentiate between the desire and needy..how does one gets to know it..(most of us are like...i m already believeing in LOA...i am having faith in it...whats wrong if i expect my guy/girl to be back with me)....


2)this should be no.1 actually but still then... i m being told to do neville/abraham/ etc etc...to do feel it like..but y dont i get to feel he/she is with me....

3)i have misunderstood the concept of detachment..u say i should be "no care at all" ..i dont want to forget my girl/guy..i want him/her to love me and me love them...

pls throw a light on all these questions cherished....this is allmost on the minds of all of people wo have posted here or there...and i strongly feel the answers are gonna be the game changer...

wonderful post !! cherished ..   ... thank you

Cherished wrote:

Desire vs needy- I desire ice cream with chocolate topping. I don't need it. I won't die if I don't have it. But I desire it. I desire my guy. I USED TO NEED HIM as though life would end if he wasn't here. I can say that now and laugh, because now that is simply not true for me at all. I know that even if I were the ONLY person here on earth, I would still be ok. My alignment is focused with source energy, and I feel absolutely connected to many many people. I am not lonely anymore. Ever. That is in stark contrast to how I used to feel. I was almost phobic about being alone. Now I adore time by myself.

I think believing and having faith is ok, but the difference is when you finally practice creating deliberately simply because it feels amazing. Lots of you are doing it explicitly for the purpose of reuniting with a lover. And until you make the switch to "I'm doing this because OMG how sensational does it feel to be in the flow of source energy every day" then you aren't quite there yet.

2. If you aren't vibrating at a high enough level, you cannot gain ACCESS to those feelings of being with her. You literally can't experience it until you a vibrational match to it. You do the processes to try to raise your vibration. So you relax, become silent, let go, feel great, breathe deeply and feel intense warmth and calm.. that's actually your vibration raising. If you can learn to do that many many times a day, it will get higher and higher. And as you become more aligned, BAM you will suddenly tap into feelings of belief that you couldn't reach before. THAT is when you will feel it real. It's why I keep saying that THE most important thing is how you FEEL. Which directly relates to how high you are vibrating. Get that up, and you will soon be believing! Am I inspiring you to raise your vibe yet?!

3. No, I don't say you should not care at all. There has never been a moment where I didn't deeply love my guy. But here's the important part- I BEGAN TO LOVE MYSELF MORE THAN I LOVED HIM. It takes time and it takes lots of soul-work. Of course you can still love them- but you have to come to understand unconditional love. And many many people say "yes I love him unconditionally!" But is that truly accurate? Do you mean that even if she only wrote on your birthday and you never saw her  again, would you still adore her? You would DESIRE her but you'd probably be furious she was off having her own life without you! That's conditional. Can you honestly say that you love someone simply because they exist in this world? Purely because your heart is full with the thought of them, and you wish only love and joy and happiness for them?! I could say that to my guy. I needed nothing from him. To me he became someone I could focus upon, and cultivate that feeling of total appreciation. I had finally come to understand what unconditional meant. Detachment means that you go on with your life FULLY. You aren't waiting for them. Waiting is needing. You go on desiring, but you aren't putting your life on hold. At all. You are out there creating the life of your dreams. And your lover would simply be the cherry atop your ice cream!

I don't feel needy anymore for once because I do see my self worth. The only fears that are left in me are no longer with my partner, but they are weaker too. So they will fade away too. I learned to love my partner unconditionally, somehow I can sense a positive change sprouting in him and within our relationship. I feel the warmth of the love and even though we are not in physical contact, I value the spiritual contact more, it is what is healing us.

Also adding onto everything amazing Cherished has said 🌻 I've been thinking lately about how we create versions of everyone and everything in our life, so we are kind of alone anyway! (Apart from having the whole universe inside us not outside of us).

In terms of moments of bad feelings, I've been having a few lately. Doubts mainly - the 'things are going too well!'

I've been trying to do visualisations, briefly, about how our FEELINGS and emotions are meaningless, until we give them meaning. Even the worst feeling you're having can be seen as an opportunity for something good. (I know that sounds so annoying when you're in a low place).

For instance, I'm having doubts, I feel crap, oh god I'm sinking lower... But hey this is a great chance to have a hot bath, to snuggle in a blanket and read a book, thank god I can feel things that's why I'm on this planet, this film of my life would be boring without twists and turns! I'm going to enjoy this moment of doubt and fear, and it's almost like once you walk upto the big scary lion of fear and say OK YEAH LETS DO IT! Drag me through this sorrow - it turns into a little kitten.

Neville uses that example of the prisoner, yes he is in prison but is he using it as a time to look at the stars and ponder his freedom or to look at the bars and ponder his incarceration.

X

Whenever I am down, your hand just reaches down and lifts me up Cherished. You are wonderful.