So I don’t want to completely rehash my origin story with this person of interest, but if you look back in my archives you’ll see what all happened. Basically back in 2015 he was the reason I became interested in LOA, he’s what I came on these forums for help attracting back, etc. I really put a lot of time into trying to attract him back, then I didn’t see any results so I just gave up, moved on, was happy.
 
Then I matched with him on Tinder this past October and we started “talking” again. It was kind of crazy because I really had given up on him. I had a great job, was talking to people, had my own interests. I just let go and didn’t care anymore. Now I would still social media creep. In fact, a few weeks before we matched I lurked on his Insta and saw him in a few pics with this one guy and it seemed like they were together. Which did hurt, I’ll admit. But then we matched so I figured they broke up.
 
I thought about finally posting the success story I’d been dreaming about in this forum. I couldn’t believe it. After all this time, we had matched and HE reached out to ME. But he said nothing about what happened and eventually communication died out. Communication was a big problem the last time we were together, so I was waiting for him to make the first move (since I had done all the effort last time). I figured I’d wait for that to happen before posting on here.
 
Well a few months passed without us talking. But this time I didn’t care. I just went about my life. Eventually I did reach out, things died out again, but then he reached out again. It continued like this in this pattern with me unsure of his true intentions and waiting for him to make a move until this past Sunday.
 
He reached out to me (good) but then started talking about how horny he is and he brought up this one time we got a hotel together way back then and then I asked him what he was looking for and he said, “Just fun. Nothing serious.” It just hurt because all this time we’ve been talking he hasn’t really brought up any memory of us and when he finally does it’s from a time we hooked up. No apology or anything. It just sucked.
 
I ended up telling him I couldn’t do that with him because of our history, which he understood, then I told him “if anything changes let me know”. Then I realized that was letting him off too easily and I sent him another message saying, “I think it’s really shitty that you knew I liked you all those years ago, knew you were shitty to me and yet still reached out to me just for a booty call. That was a dick move. Hopefully one day you grow up.” And he responded, “Fair point. My apologies.” Then I unmatched him.
 
I’m obviously hurt and have a lot of thoughts going through my head. It just pisses me off that all those years ago I really liked him, but he was too busy for his work, he put me on the back burner for six months, then when I reached out to him he said he wasn’t interested. But then he comes back after all this time just to try and hook up with me. I know I attracted this, but honestly it just really turned me off from him. All that time I pined after him was such a waste. What hurts the most is that he didn’t even acknowledge what happened but he acknowledged that effin hotel.
 
So I’m just done with him. I’m going through a lot of hurt, but ultimately I just want to turn the page on this. I do believe in LOA, I do believe you can have your specific person and I do believe people can change. This just wasn’t an example of that. I also believe some people aren’t right for you and this was it. Again, I attracted this. Recently I’ve lost my job and been rejected from every MFA program I applied to and have been feeling “really not good enough”. Last week I looked at his IG and saw more pics of him and that guy and focused more on him having a bf and then this happened. He clearly only wants fun because he’s either cheating or in an open relationship with that guy. So I did manifest this. But I don’t want it, don’t want him anymore. He clearly can’t change. And maybe I could change my thoughts/ vibration, but I just don’t want to go through the effort anymore.
 
And yet…I wish I had said more to him. Wish I told him how he hurt me all those years ago. Part of me even wishes I had hooked up with him just so I could’ve seen him in person and made my peace with him verbally, but I know that ultimately it would’ve hurt too much to hook up with him in the first place.
 
But I guess it doesn’t matter because it’s the past. My happiness matters more than getting closure with someone who treated me like ****. I’m now focusing on creating a new, different better person. He’s not right for me, and that was a hard lesson to learn, and I’m still learning it in a way, but ultimately I will get through this.
 
I guess I’m just coming here to let all you specific person people that, yes, you can do it. You may have a completely different case than mine, I truly believe it. This “encounter” happened YEARS later (four years I believe). Honestly, what helped the most was not thinking about him or LOA. I stopped going on these forums, I still meditated and thought positively, but I more just went with the flow of life and didn’t obsess as much about getting what I want and then this happened. It probably would’ve turned out differently if my vibration had been different. But that’s always the hard thing with LOA: knowing when enough is enough, when to keep working at something and when to move on. It’s hard with LOA, which can give you whatever you want, to know when to give up on something. Nothing ever happened with this guy when I was obsessing over LOA, it all happened when I let go. And some people on these forums say to not call people out, but honestly you don’t want to be a pushover and sometimes you have to set boundaries with people. That’s what I did with this guy, because ultimately I’m looking for love, not empty fun, and it sucks, but this road to happiness and using LOA is hard. That’s something I rarely see said on here.