Posted by lovehim2020  12/19/2018 2:31 pm | #1 |
Hello All,
Looking for some guidance and/or positive thoughts about my situtation. A few years ago, I successfully used LOA to manifest my SP and we spent almost 2 wonderful years together. He began to slide into depression over the last month due to external family pressures. As someone who has experienced debilitating depression myself, I did my best to support him while also giving him the space he asked for to clear his head. (We live 1.5 hours away from each other.) He began to contact me less and less all the while saying, "I'm sorry, it has nothing to do with you, I just feel like my life is falling my apart. Just know that I love you and appreciate you." Eventually he stopped replying at all, and I became panicky, fearful, worried. Not a good look, and I now see I was giving off those negative vibrations. I also realize I was trying to "fix" him and "mother" him, which is not what he needs. I was very careful about my words to him during this time, but forgot that my thoughts and feelings don't need to be spoken to be felt by the other person. I messaged him that I understood his need for space, but that his silence really hurt. I now see that was another mistake. He was regretful and apologetic about not reaching out often. Then, 19 days ago he sent me the following text and I haven't heard from him since "Ugggh I've got to stop this relationship. I'm sorry. There is nobody else. I'm going through s*** right now that I can't figure out. I need to just do me for now. It's not fair to you to be treated this way with me not texting or calling. Trying to keep it together. Everything is falling apart and I need a break from it all to get my head straight. Please don't call after reading this. I don't want to break down. I can't take care of the one girl that means the most to me if my head is f***ed. I'm sorry for not calling. I just can't right now. I'm sorry." I sent him a couple of quick texts after this, just telling him I was here whenever we was ready to talk, no pressure etc. and that I understand and care for him deeply. No response and no contact since. I have not contacted him in 9 days. He hasn't deleted me from social media, and I have been getting better at not checking on him, stalking his page etc. as I now realize this is counter-productive. I have been working on self-love in many ways (therapy, exercise, time with friends) and it feels really good. I just struggle with the part that others have struggled with which is how do you imagine a future with your SP but also really believe that you will be ok without that person? I understand both concepts but the combining of the two is proving difficult. Thanks for reading and thanks for posting all your wonderful stories!
Last edited by lovehim2020 (12/20/2018 8:05 am)
|
Posted by lovehim2020 12/20/2018 8:08 am | #2 |
Just have to say that I really enjoy reading all of your posts. While I'm a little bummed I didn't get a response yet, I can see that you all are busy responding to others and when you do, it helps us all. I am really feeling happy today and reading your posts just makes it better! Thanks to all who have posted. Much love!
|
Posted by lovehim2020 12/23/2018 2:24 am | #3 |
Hello All,
Just wanted to share an update. I have been devouring this board over the past few weeks and really liked the idea of asking for a sign that I was on the right path. About a week ago I asked to see a purple car as my sign. Yesterday while walking with a friend and keeping my vibrations high, I saw not 1 but 3 purple cars all within a 10 minute period! After I saw the first car, I shared my sign and LOA generally with my friend. We were both so excited that we saw the car, that we saw 2 more after that!!! I really needed this sign as the doubts were starting to creep in more frequently. It’s been 3 weeks since my SP ended things but I know he will we back now!! Thank you all for reading and sending me more good vibes! 💕
|
Posted by Cynthia 12/23/2018 2:52 am | #4 |
I saw your post and would have replied, but I didn't know where to begin. There is so much to tell you, but I don't have the strength or the will to repeat myself again, so I'll just recommend studying the teachings of Neville Goddard. He will explain how you can create your own reality on purpose and how you can help another person as well. If you follow his teachings and remain faithful to them, you won't have to try to come to terms with being okay with not having the relationship because you will have the relationship and doing without it won't be a concern.
The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
|
Posted by lovehim2020 12/23/2018 3:15 am | #5 |
Thank you so much, Cynthia! I have read your responses to others and have already learned so much from you! That is one thing that sticks out to me - that so many of us are in the same boat! Learning and growing after a breakup and trying to become the best version of ourselves. I also think the concept of self love can be such a tough one, for women especially. That may prove to be my biggest challenge - learning to truly love myself and be kind in my self-talk.
Again, thank you for reading and replying. I will continue to post here as It is helpful for me to get it out, even if I don’t get any replies. I am so grateful for you and this board! Thank you!
|
Posted by Cynthia 12/23/2018 3:41 am | #6 |
lovehim2020 wrote:
Thank you so much, Cynthia! I have read your responses to others and have already learned so much from you! That is one thing that sticks out to me - that so many of us are in the same boat! Learning and growing after a breakup and trying to become the best version of ourselves. I also think the concept of self love can be such a tough one, for women especially. That may prove to be my biggest challenge - learning to truly love myself and be kind in my self-talk.
Again, thank you for reading and replying. I will continue to post here as It is helpful for me to get it out, even if I don’t get any replies. I am so grateful for you and this board! Thank you!
Thank you. That's very kind of you to say that. There's nothing wrong with self love, it's a good thing to have, but I proved in my own experience many years ago when I had abso!utely no self-esteem that it isn't necessary to manifesting anything and neither is 'feeling good.' You'll only need those things if you believe you do.
Last edited by Cynthia (12/23/2018 3:42 am)
The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
|
Posted by lovehim2020 12/23/2018 6:02 am | #7 |
Wow, I didn’t consider that. Thanks again! I will continue to learn about Neville but in between I find the interpretations here to be so relatable!
|
Posted by lovehim2020 12/24/2018 8:01 am | #8 |
Guys, it’s happening! I took a different route home yesterday and passed a car dealership. Guess what color car was front and center for sale!? Purple! Also, I dreamt of him last night. A very clear, normal-type dream where he finally messaged me and we began talking again. This feels so good!
|
Posted by PrettyFlamingo 12/24/2018 10:37 am | #9 |
Guys, it’s happening! I took a different route home yesterday and passed a car dealership. Guess what color car was front and center for sale!? Purple! Also, I dreamt of him last night. A very clear, normal-type dream where he finally messaged me and we began talking again. This feels so good!
I don't understand looking for signs. I thought Neville said signs follow things happening, rather than indicate what is about to happen? I don't get all the angel number and 11:11 stuff either.
Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
|
Posted by Cynthia 12/24/2018 10:51 am | #10 |
Guys, it’s happening! I took a different route home yesterday and passed a car dealership. Guess what color car was front and center for sale!? Purple! Also, I dreamt of him last night. A very clear, normal-type dream where he finally messaged me and we began talking again. This feels so good!
I don't understand looking for signs. I thought Neville said signs follow things happening, rather than indicate what is about to happen? I don't get all the angel number and 11:11 stuff either.
Signs follow, they don't precede, this reminds me of 'I'll believe it when I see it' when it's really you'll see it when you believe it. I don't get that angel number and repeated number stuff, either, but it seems like they're ways people use to give themselves hope that something is going the way they want it to. It really shows their lack of faith, in my view, just more signs to look for that they wouldn't need if they really believed.
The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
