Need some help

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Posted by Adrita
3/18/2018 1:01 pm
#1

First, i'm not an english speaker, so i apologyze.
My guy and have a long story, he has left twice and after a few months he's Back. This is the 3rd time... I was living with him... An things went so wrong... He ask me to leave our house almost 2 months ago. Our biggest problem is that in betwing the time together he's always with another girl. So when he is Back im always mad. This time im trying to manifest him back. Imagining hes just taking time, totally free... But he seems really decided not to go Back. Im trying For the second time 25 day challenge.... Everybody around me is telling me to forget about him... Everybody thinks that hes not a good man For leave me 3 times and its not a good relationship. Im acting as if... I bought a ring and I wear it pretending to be married to him.  I think he is the love of my life. And I really miss him. He told me that hes not in love anymore, but he says that everytime, everytime he wants to break UP... so i don't believe it is true.  Please help!

 
Posted by PrettyFlamingo
3/18/2018 1:23 pm
#2

Why do you love him so much? What are the good qualities he possesses that you love? Does he love, support, encourage and treasure you, for example?

Also who does the house belong to?


Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
 
Posted by Adrita
3/18/2018 2:21 pm
#3

He is the owner of the house. I love him just because... Hes got a lot of good things, when we are together Hes nice, and lovely. He takes care of me, he is kind. He was trying to create a life together, but I couldn't stop fighting For the past, and I was really jealous I know i created this. So im trying to create a time separated For thinking and relaxing and to be together For good. No more arguments For the past....and a good life together For the rest of our lives. But he's tired ... And he's gone away....

 
Posted by Cynthia
3/18/2018 5:53 pm
#4

Adrita wrote:

First, i'm not an english speaker, so i apologyze.
My guy and have a long story, he has left twice and after a few months he's Back. This is the 3rd time... I was living with him... An things went so wrong... He ask me to leave our house almost 2 months ago. Our biggest problem is that in betwing the time together he's always with another girl. So when he is Back im always mad. This time im trying to manifest him back. Imagining hes just taking time, totally free... But he seems really decided not to go Back. Im trying For the second time 25 day challenge.... Everybody around me is telling me to forget about him... Everybody thinks that hes not a good man For leave me 3 times and its not a good relationship. Im acting as if... I bought a ring and I wear it pretending to be married to him. I think he is the love of my life. And I really miss him. He told me that hes not in love anymore, but he says that everytime, everytime he wants to break UP... so i don't believe it is true. Please help!

It doesn't matter what other people think or say about him or about your being together. It's what you desire and believe that matter. For one thing, you've got to stop the arguments, the jealousy, the temper tantrums - as you've seen, they have produced undesirable results. They've pushed him away, they've driven him away.  Neville said and proved, 'Imagination creates reality.' From what you have said, I gather that you want to be happily married to this person, so that is what you would imagine - being blissfully happily married to this person. The wedding ring you should be wearing is the one in your imagination, not a physical ring, unless the physical ring helps with your imagining. The imaginary ring is far more powerful. Everything happens in your imagination first before it happens in the outside world. Also, just imagine the two of you happily together, don't give any more of your mental energy to thinking about any other girls. Ignore the current reality as best you can in the meantime. Your only focus should be on 'living in the end of the wish fulfilled', as Neville called it. In your case, that means imagining your blissfully happy marriage with this person as though you already have it, remembering to fill in all of the details that are important to you that will be a part of this marriage. Neville recommended doing this before you go to sleep at night, as he found it particularly effective to do it then, but you could really do it whenever you could get yourself into a relaxed state where your subconscious mind was receptive. This is like planting seeds, so you have to give it some time for these seeds to grow and trust that this process works and not get impatient and frustrated if it takes a while. It takes as long as it takes. For some people it seems to be faster or slower than other people, but don't let that discourage you.
You could also try Neville's revision. To do that, one version of it is to go back to unpleasant, undesirable situations that have occurred and rewrite them and relive them in your imagination. For example, if he said, 'I don't love you any more' you could, in your imagination, replay the scene with him saying 'I'll always love you, you're the only woman for me' and giving you a hug and a kiss. That's just an example. You could do it with anything, and it could be something like getting a letter that you didn't like. You could rewrite it in your imagination to say what you wanted it to say.

Last edited by Cynthia (3/18/2018 5:56 pm)


The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
 
Posted by Adrita
3/18/2018 11:57 pm
#5

Thank you thank you thank you...i was focusing on his Words, focusing  on the People and afraid of him being with some other girl. Now I Know how to start doing my Best job to be with him once again and For good.

Thank you

 
Posted by Cynthia
3/19/2018 1:48 am
#6

You're very welcome.


The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
 
Posted by Adrita
3/19/2018 4:08 pm
#7

Scarlet11 wrote:

Hi,

​You said that everytime you two break up, he finds another girl and he is with her.
​And then you get back together and you are mad because he was with another girl.

​First... you're not feeling worthy and you're not feeling good enough.
​You have to feel like a priority. You have to put yourself on a pedestal.
​Think about yourself as if you are the best girl in the world!
​Imagine him missing you and thinking about you! Imagine that he loves you and can't live without you. Imagine that he's so in love with you that he can't even look at other girls!

​Obviously you're scared that he will find someone else when you break up and that's why he finds someone else. So don't think that way.
​You need to love yourself and you need to think about yourself as if you're the best girl he could ever had!

You are so right... I need to start seeing myself worthy and special. Thank you!

 
Posted by Adrita
3/23/2018 1:00 am
#8

So, I messed up... There was a girl whom used to be my Best friend, but one day she stopped talking to me, and Last year when my love and I where apart, she tried to manipulate things to make him hate me. This time shes near  him once again. She took some pictures and put them on instagram. I over reacted and I contacted him... I was hurt, and I wasnt thinking clearly.  He told me she is no even his friend...I don't undertad why he added her to his friends list.... But he can do whatever he wants to, because hes not my boyfriend anymore. He was mad,  really mad,  out of control, and very rude... He told me not to get into his life and that he Will never ever be with me again. That he is totally convinvinced, he doesnt believe in me... And that i tried to control his life.... I really messed up. I was not thinking. I know... I shouldnt contact  him in a place of desperation and angry...

 
Posted by fizzy
3/24/2018 6:51 am
#9

Adrita wrote:

So, I messed up... There was a girl whom used to be my Best friend, but one day she stopped talking to me, and Last year when my love and I where apart, she tried to manipulate things to make him hate me. This time shes near  him once again. She took some pictures and put them on instagram. I over reacted and I contacted him... I was hurt, and I wasnt thinking clearly.  He told me she is no even his friend...I don't undertad why he added her to his friends list.... But he can do whatever he wants to, because hes not my boyfriend anymore. He was mad,  really mad,  out of control, and very rude... He told me not to get into his life and that he Will never ever be with me again. That he is totally convinvinced, he doesnt believe in me... And that i tried to control his life.... I really messed up. I was not thinking. I know... I shouldnt contact  him in a place of desperation and angry...

Don’t contact him anymore. Don’t worry about anything he’s doing at all and live in the end. Will this stuff really matter after the two of you have reconciled and are in a happy relationship together? You can revise this situation if that’ll help.

 
Posted by Adrita
3/24/2018 12:45 pm
#10

fizzy wrote:

Adrita wrote:

So, I messed up... There was a girl whom used to be my Best friend, but one day she stopped talking to me, and Last year when my love and I where apart, she tried to manipulate things to make him hate me. This time shes near  him once again. She took some pictures and put them on instagram. I over reacted and I contacted him... I was hurt, and I wasnt thinking clearly.  He told me she is no even his friend...I don't undertad why he added her to his friends list.... But he can do whatever he wants to, because hes not my boyfriend anymore. He was mad,  really mad,  out of control, and very rude... He told me not to get into his life and that he Will never ever be with me again. That he is totally convinvinced, he doesnt believe in me... And that i tried to control his life.... I really messed up. I was not thinking. I know... I shouldnt contact  him in a place of desperation and angry...

Don’t contact him anymore. Don’t worry about anything he’s doing at all and live in the end. Will this stuff really matter after the two of you have reconciled and are in a happy relationship together? You can revise this situation if that’ll help.

 
Thank you... I Will. I was in a bad place. Will try to start thinking the way it Will really be. Thank you

 


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