I got the question how to move to way 1. I think more people can benefit from the answer, so I will post it here.

My personal opinion is that the very quickest way is to let got of the ex COMPLETELY for a while. I just can speak for myself but when I look back it wasn't healthy at all that I tried to get my ex back directly after the breakup. I think it gets much easier and much quicker when you first completely concentrate on yourself. No visualising, no scripting, no thinking about the ex, no hoping. Just coming back on your feet and pushing every thought about him aside. I made the decision to completely let go after maybe 4 months and guys, believe me, it awakened the worst fears within me. After I really decided to put every thought about him aside it felt like another breakup. I cried even though I hadn't for a whole while. Until this point I energetically still was in the broken relationship and it was totally unhealthy. I think you can sustain this state for years if you are not able to let go. Accept that the old relationship is gone forever! But it wasn't that great in the end, right? So you want a brand new one and it's okay to let the old one go.

After maybe 2 weeks of not thinking about your ex and concentrating completely on yourself you will find your energy shift. Maybe it needs more time but for me it changed everything.

Don't be afraid of letting go. You can return to thinking about your ex anytime you want. It's just a short break to give more attention to another amazing person - yourself. And once again, it sounds like a detour but it's not.

I want to bump this post because it helped me so much whenever I was down. In fact, I book marked it and it was the ONLY reason I logged into the forum. Sanshi, based on your assessment, where was I then and where am I now? Remind the readers.

Last edited by mugginess (5/02/2017 1:26 am)

^^^well I think I was on road 3 and I remember there were other readers on that road whom you also tried so hard to get off that road and didn't get it. My advice for all those road 3 people is to take a break from all of this. It'll make you feel better. I can say I'm finally on road 1

Sanshi wrote:

This is my 200th post and I want to use it to share something I've learned on this incredible journey.

Most people here stumbled over LoA because they desperately wanted an ex back. The knowledge about LoA is a great gift but getting back an ex is not the easiest thing to get started with LoA - in fact I think it's one of the hardest.The concept of LoA is simple to understand but to really embody it is a completely different thing. You have to first really believe in it and to get benefit out of it on a daily basis you have to change your thoughts - not only about the ex but about the grumpy bus driver, the annoying teens on the street and the bitchy colleague, because if you don't do it they all affect your vibration and that again affects your manifestations.

Something many people don't want to hear in the beginning is: It will most probably take time until he/she is back! I know I wrote a post about the time it takes until something manifests and I said that you don't have to wait for anything and it may sound like a contradiction to my own post but it's not. The vibration of most (if not all) people after a breakup is all over the place. From this position it's IMPOSSIBLE to get someone back. If you decide to use LoA after a breakup to manifest a reconciliation you have three possible ways you can take:

Way No. 1: You decide to take the time to first work on yourself. You take the time to heal and get over the broken relationship. After you have analysed what your wrongs and what you want to do better next time you COMPLETELY drop the old relationship, all your stories about it and your ex (for a while). Your focus is on getting back on your feet and becoming your happiest version. The most important thing is that you do all of this for YOU (I know that's nearly impossible in the beginning of this journey). Because you are worth it and the most important person in your life. I can't say how long it takes to get to your happiest version. It can be two months, it can be six or more. It's a total individual thing but it shouldn't matter for you. You take the time that's necessary because you know it's for your highest good. When you are reached a constant high vibration you start to work on getting your love back. You've completely forgotten about the old relationship and it's thrilling for you to imagine the new one. You can feel it with every fiber of your being and you know that it will happen and that the vibrational reality already exist - that is enough for you for now. You don't think about him/her much, you just know that he/she is yours and everytime you visualise you only do it because you love it and it brings great joy, not because you want to make something happen. You aren't desperate because you are happy with your life and you know you don't need your ex, so it doesn't really matter when he/she comes back. Way No. 1 is the shortest way you can take to get your ex back and it's the best choice if you want to make sure that you don't get lost on the way. Reaching your destination is a sure thing if you take Way No. 1.

Way No. 2: For most people it's hard to take Way No. 1 directly after a breakup because they think they need their ex back as quickly as possible and Way No. 1 doesn't sound like a quick solution. So they decide for another way. If they take Way No. 2 they struggle for a while. They maybe analyse their ex's behaviour, they worry that their ex find a new love and forget about them, they try to convince themselfs that everything is working out but they have problems to believe it, they have one day on which they force themself to feel really good only to fall back into feeling doubtful and fearful the next day or yet after a few hours. They try to feel good in order to get their ex back. They visualise in order to get their ex back. They meditate in order to get their ex back. They hang on to this way until it gets too draining and then they realise that Way No. 1 would have been the better option and take the next exit to get on Way No. 1. For these people it takes longer to get their ex back but they will get there eventually if they are persistent.

Way No. 3: These people start on Way No. 2 but they miss the exit and struggle their way forward until they give up. Way No. 3 has no and never had a tie to the end goal.

Unfortunately many people decide to take Way No. 3 and they completely ignore all the exits to Way No. 1. How can you avoid being one of the people that are walking in cicles without getting anywhere?

By being honest with yourself!

That's one of the most important things I learned. You have to be honest with yourself, always always always!
Why do you want your ex back?
Is it really love or it's just that you are so hurt?
Or do you even want him back to dump him because you feel you should be the one to end the relationship?

Be honest about that!
If you feel that you really love your ex the next questions for you to answer are:

Which way I'm on right now?
How do I feel right now?
Do I feel really good or do I fake it/force it to make something happen?

You can tell yourself that you are on Way No. 1 but that doesn't change the fact that you are on Way No. 2. You can lie to yourself about your vibration but your vibration is still the same and you attract what you are vibrating on, not what you are telling yourself. Deep down you know the truth. You can't really lie to yourself, so don't even try it. The moment you are in the vibration to get your ex back you know it, believe me. But the way can be long. If you tell yourself stories about how good you feel and how much you believe but you force yourself to feel good and fake your belief then that doesn't help. It just slows everything way down because you have no chance to work on the problems.
It's a good thing to find a block on the road. Don't bump in it again and again because you try to convince yourself that it isn't there. Take the time and put the effort in to take it from the road. Believe me, you can handle every block. For every problem you carry the solution within you. You can break through your fears, your doubts, your worries, your disbelieve and you finally can reach your goal. Rome wasn't built in a day either. Accept that it needs time, take all the pressure off yourself and go faithfully your way for you were honest to yourself and therefore know that you are on Way No. 1 which leads you to your goal for sure.

A Japanese proverb says: "When you are in hurry make a detour". It sounds contradictory at first but sometimes your perception is false and the seemingly longer way is in reality the shortest.
 

Hey Sanshi! I just came across this post and it's exactly what I've been going through! Last Sunday I decided to completely let him go and although I'm still working on it, I'm about 95% there. It's scary as hell and has felt like another breakup, but I always think about the alternative. Constantly focusing on him and wondering where I was in the manifestation process wasn't bringing me any success, so it's a great thing that I've decided to move on. I've let go of a lot of the desperation and neediness. I feel lighter and more free, but also still a little sad.

I was wondering what kind of success you had by doing this? What was the outcome for you? What worked and what didn't work? What advice could you give?

Thanks so much in advance

AnythingIsPossible wrote:

I was wondering what kind of success you had by doing this? What was the outcome for you? What worked and what didn't work? What advice could you give?

Thanks so much in advance

I am not sure what exactly I wrote in that post and I don't feel at all like rereading. It's been 1 1/2 years since I wrote this and I am not the same person anymore...incredible far from it in fact. You probably want to hear information about the guy, but I will give you a brief overview over what I think was important and maybe interesting.

When I wrote that post, I had let go of the guy I joined the forum for. Why had I let go of him? Not because I was so smart or something. No, I met another guy, chased him to death (not literally, but he disappeared) and tried to manifest him. Until I met the next guy around October last year and he also disappeared. I tried to manifest him until I met another guy in January this year. I tried to manifest him and to bring a little variety in the picture, he didn't disappear this time, but told me he was a psychopath and couldn't bond with people. At that point, I decided enough was enough. I didn't try to create a loving version of him. I dropped him and decided to start a relationship with MEEEEE. From that point on, my life started to change. I got rid of stuff that had been with me for years without even working on it. I always hated sports and had to push myself to do it. Suddenly, I did different kinds of sports 5 times a week and I loved it. I didn't longer had to kick my own ass to go there. I made a decision that had been impossible for me before, because I carried around a lot of stuff that wasn't mine to begin with. I started to believe in myself. I quit my job that I hated (only 5 hours a week, but it was draining) without having something new. But guess what? Within 10 days, I had a new one with nearly the same conditions, just better work and more hours what I wanted - it was the only one I applied for at that time. A short time later, I got another job. I went in the interviews with confidence and told them "I can do that and if I can't then I can learn it". Believe me...that was the opposite of my old me. And it wasn't fake. It came naturally. Bascially, a lot of stuff I used to worry about was working out at that time. And I got a completely free trip to Mallorca which was great. Another thing that changed for me was that I went vegan. I was vegan in 2014 and went back to vegetarian in the beginning of 2015. I didn't want to. It just happened. From that time on, I wanted to be vegan again, but I couldn't. And now, it's suddenly absolutely effortless.
Since I stopped chasing guys, I suddenly felt free. I wasn't in need of a relationship the first time within years. I felt content with myself. And when I think about it, since I let go of all the guys my life got more interesting. I had two new jobs, two different new sports (and with that a lot of new people), a move, an internship, a bachelor thesis that I dropped in the end, a flight... So much movement within one year is new to me. But you wonder: What is with the guy? Well, I can tell you from my own experience that just dropping a guy and not thinking about him anymore or even falling in love with another guy doesn't bring the first guy back. I completely let go of him and nothing happened - at least nothing in regards to him, it happened a lot as you could read.

What I have learned what doesn't work is to affirm that you are in a relationship with xy while you are aware of not being in a relationship with xy. This just reinforces not being with them and that's why they disappeared. I am not kidding, before I knew about LoA, I got every single guy I wanted. And now I failed three times in a row..wtf? I can tell you what it was. By "acting as if" I reinforced not being with them, because it was just acting. Acting as if doesn't work. Faking doesn't work. What does work is feeling it real. I felt myself looking at the ocean and a week later, a guy I have no romantic interest in asked me to join him for his trip - he paid at least 1200€ (I can pay my rent for 4 months with that). I felt that I will get problems with my advisor of my bachelor thesis and I did. I felt that my ex (one I have broken up with years ago) was single again and a month later, he told me he was after 6 years or so (didn't care about it, just noticed it). I felt myself lying on a bed in a student dorm (wasn't even intended- just a random flash) and a little later, I got a room there directly after applying (the first time I tried that, it took 1 1/2 years for them to have a free room). I felt that the guy who seemed to be very into me had a problem and BOOM he disappeared. I felt that something was wrong with the other guy I liked and BOOM he was a psychopath. It's no accident that I started every one of that sentences with "I felt". That's always the key. You have to BE it. When you be it, you feel it to be real. It's not feeling positive or something. It's about feeling it as a reality. It works even when you do it just for a moment and then drop it as long as you don't contradict the energy.
So stopping to chase your guy won't bring your guy back necessarily, but you will have a life worth living again. I know that I will never make my life about a guy so much.