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1/07/2020 8:42 pm  #1


any advice?

Some time ago I just get acquainted with someone who I think is quite interesting after a long time waiting for it without forcing it to happen. Actually I was quite confused how the introduction incident could occur, but I thought it was the result of my manifestation of trying to let go of the desire to get to know him even though I already knew who he was. As before it happened I tried to stay away from him for the target of 5 days even though the realization just 4 days. But after that happened it seemed like he knew that I had an interest in him, or something else that I didn't know why. What I know is that when it happens there is one of his friends around me and maybe he heard my conversation with my friends about what happened during the incident or whatever my friends talking about it, then he told this to his friend who is someone who I am amazed with. Then after 1 hr, he tweeted some words that describe disgusting. Then in the early morning tweeted something that means fed up with someone's behavior, or something that shows someone needs affection from him. But im 100% sure i dont do something that pretends like i need his affection in front of him because after that incident he is gone. But I am really sure that one of his friends told him, im not regretting or feeling sad if he doesn't interest me. but there's something that I regret, that was his tweet that makes me think that he judges me as a poor human being. I just can't stop thinking what people think of me. As i often meet him as he is a new barista at my fav coffee shop. So when im visiting there, I always feel really insecure when I know that he's there. 

Everything likes escalated very quickly, after that incident i think my law of attraction runs pretty well but after i know what he tweeted i just dont know what to do. Because i think it wasnt fair and it wasnt even my fault. I tried to let go everything that i want with him, pretending like i already got all of it. But sometime i just cant stop think about what he thinks about me. Im not rushing thing to happen as fast as i want, but i worried about my image in front of him and maybe his friends. I just wanna gone from this world right now. 

So what should i do to remove that thought, because it often appears suddenly or any advice for me to live my life before that stupid thing happen?
Then when I continue do the "manifesting and let go" thing of LOA, can I still get him even though he already think that im a bad human being?

sorry for my bad english.

 

1/08/2020 4:04 am  #2


Re: any advice?

I think you are way, way over the top with your reaction, or over-reaction. Seriously, you want to be "gone from this world right now" because some bloke you rather like but don't really know, who works in a coffee shop you visit, has posted some tweets that may have absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with you? How can he think of you as a "poor human being"? He doesn't know you. Think about that. 

I don't know what the "incident" you refer to is, but what I'm going to do is copy a post here that I replied to yesterday (below). 

I am going to be lazy and refer you to another thread:

https://veronicaloa.boardhost.com/viewtopic.php?id=9445

In particular, read the very last post by Cynthia. I am being lazy by copying it, but it is the most important thing you need to know, all contained in the last post. 

None of all the other stuff you have said in your post matters. You need to focus on you, what you want, live in the end (read all of Cynthia's post to get the meaning).

I would advise against talking about this with your mates, and just get on with life. 

And here is something from my own experience:

I listen to the radio a lot at work and a song just came on that reminded me of a situation when I was 18. I met a guy one night when out with my friend.  He was with two of his mates and we chatted to them for three consecutive Saturdays and then on the third Saturday he drove me home and we kissed, he then went to work away for two weeks promising to get together when he returned, and when he came back he ignored me. When I challenged him he just said “I’ve changed my mind”. I spent a year mooning, crying, trying to get him “back”. Nothing happened, in fact he got someone else pregnant and married her when he was only 19. (they later ended up divorced) Over a year later I just made the decision “you know what, this is just enough” and decided to let it go. None of this was Law of Attraction related, as I’d never heard of it then. Then he told me one night (after I’d pestered him by writing to him and getting my cousin to talk to him for me) that he would go out with me again, and he didn’t, and said he had only said it to get rid of me. I didn’t understand it, because I’m far from being a minger, and he didn’t really know me well enough to make an informed decision about my personality or character enough to reject me. And I knew zero about him too, and probably would have found him not really what I wanted. (but my reasoning at the time was to be allowed to make that choice for myself – just to go out with him and if it didn’t work, then it didn’t).

 
I spent a sum total of 9 hours (and that is being generous) just chatting to this bloke, including about two hours snogging him. And just based on that I convinced myself I was in love with him, he was the one for me etc based on that, which really, is nothing is it?. I had daydreams about us being together, being married and so on and projecting it into the future. I wrote stuff about him in my journal day in, day out. It affected the quality of my life, because I hadn’t got him. I didn’t do it from a LOA point of view as I’d never heard of it. But it took up a whole year of my life. I was into reading romantic sagas back then and I probably liked the drama of the whole thing – I identified with the star-crossed lovers in the book. I even started seeing one of his friends just so I could be around him when we went out (I had more fun with the friend, but we were really only friends)
 
The trouble with this is that this rejection or whatever you wish to call it affected me for years and years – I expected to get chucked by every guy I went out with, or not to be able to get together with someone I fancied because I wouldn’t be good enough for them.
 
How on earth did one person who I knew for nine hours manage to cause that much upset in my life – or more to the point, how did I allow him to because I’m sure he never intended it, he never really thought much about me.
 
I did all that damage to myself because of distorted thinking and not realising my own worth. I felt that I disrespected myself by all the chasing, mooning and crying. Why do we do this to ourselves? 
 


Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
 

1/08/2020 5:10 am  #3


Re: any advice?

I agree with PrettyFlamingo. To be honest, I have no idea what you're talking about, about 'this thing that happened', but you are making a big deal out of nothing. It doesn't sound from what you said that that person knows you or you know him, so why would you want to be gone from this world over him or anybody else? This is just one of the many reasons I detest social media and have nothing to do with it myself. It's utterly meaningless and often very destructive.  That person 'tweets' something that wasn't worth reading, and you automatically assume it was about you and get all upset when it probably wasn't about you at all.. Even if it was about you, so what? He doesn't even know you. Why would you give anybody, especially a stranger, that kind of power over you?

You sound very young, but whether you are young or not, it seems like your underlying problem is low self-esteem. When people have low self-esteem, they seem to think that people around them are constantly judging them. If they walk past a group of people who perhaps laugh as they pass by, they think the people are laughing at them instead of something funny they were talking about that had nothing to do with them. I had a lot of parental abuse and neglect and grew up feeling totally worthless with no self-esteem at all, so I know what it's like. You think everybody in the world is judging you, talking about you, laughing at you.

You need to work on your self-esteem. Self-hypnosis is really effective for that, but even making positive statements to yourself about yourself on a daily basis should help. You are just as good as anybody else. There's no reason to think you're inferior or that other people are better than you.If you start seeing yourself as important and worthwhile, so will other people.

Last edited by Cynthia (1/08/2020 5:37 am)


The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
 

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