I posted my story in Self Love Thread in 2018 but decided to repost here with my update to hopefully inspire someone.

Backstory:
- May 2016, My boyfriend of 9 years (Fiancé of 2 years) broke up with me and cancelled our wedding in April 2017 due to commitment issues. He said he became unsure about getting married to me. I was devastated and felt like my whole world fell apart. (By the way, I realized now that it wasn't because of committment issues but because few months before the break up I became really insecure and jealous of everyone around him. I got jealous whenever he talked to other people even to his family members. Also, since we got engage, I began to have the mentality that since we're getting married, it'll be his responsibility to take care of me and make me happy.) After our breakup, I became very desperate and chased him around to begged him to come back.

- July 2016, He finally gave in and agreed to try again but it wasn't the same anymore. It literally felt like I was with a different guy. He avoided intimacy, was very distant and felt like he was just forcing himself to be with me. It lasted almost a month until I decided to just let him go and move on.

- September 2016, I was slowly moving on. I did No contact, traveled, reconnected with old friends, met new friends and pretty much everything and anything to get him off my mind. Around this time, I’ve learned about Law of Attraction. I was skeptical at first but I decided to give it a shot because deep inside me I knew I still want him back. Before I sleep, I would imagine happy moments with him and started 'acting as if' we are back together. Few weeks after that, he called me out of the blue to ask me out because he said he missed me so much. Since then his actions towards me gradually improved. We began from texting and going out 1-2 times every other week to acting like we were back together, as if the break up didn't happen.
From then on I applied Law of Attraction on and off for about a year. I've read The Secret, discovered Veronica Isles's and Agnes Vivarelli's videos and other LOA coaches. I did all the techniques (Whispering Technique, Rubbing Out, imagination, Pussy Whip, Remote Seduction, acting as if on and off) and I've proven that all these work, however, I’ve always felt that something was missing. LOA works everytime, and it always works on my man, but I noticed that everytime I get the result that I wanted from him, I slacked then unconciously I go back to being needy, suspicous, jealous and wondering “When will we get married?!”. And always complained about him being hot and cold towards me and about his plans about us.

- May 2017, We became officially in a relationship again and it was great for few months. However, towards the end of the year of the year, I became very insecure again and would have constant negative thoughts like 'If our relationship is back on track, why isn't he proposing?'... 'Why isn't he giving me my ring back yet?'... and the worst part, I let other people's opinion get into me and as a result, I became very emotional and pressured him to give me answers as to why is our relationship not moving forward.

- February 2018, He asked for a space due to stress at work and in our relationship. He wanted to take his time to himself for a while and think things through. His exact words, “I just want to drop everything right now and just stay away from everyone and everything”. That shocked me and made me come to my senses. I didn't say anything to him because I knew I was the one who made him feel that way. I remembered what Agnes Vivarelli  said in videos that everyone is you pushed out. I made him push me out. I thought to myself if I don't stop my negativities I would lose him again. And then I asked myself what am I doing wrong? Because I know that LOA works, it works everytime. I got him back but why it isn't moving forward the way I wanted it to be? Then I remembered one of her videos about Self- love being the missing link in LOA! It literally felt like a light bulb! It is SELF LOVE!! Because I did everything, I did all the LOA techniques there is BUT self love!

One week after our conversation, he told me he booked a flight for a 2 day vacation for himself to take a breather. We didn't speak for few days before his flight. The night before he left, I texted him and told to enjoy his vacation and try not to stress too much. I told him that I want nothing in the world but for him to be happy.  At that point too, I suddenly felt very exhausted, not from loving him but from trying to make things happen. That’s when I decided to just let everything go. I just stopped doing all my work to get him back.

While he was away, I just did whispering technique and I also imagined telling him “I love you and I am now letting you go because I want you to be happy. You don't have to love me back because it is my responsibility to love and make myself happy.” After that I felt like a huge weight lifted off my chest and my shoulders.

I decided to do Self- love meditations really seriously! I did self love and I mean A LOT! Lol! I focused on myself, I went back to the gym, I started dating my self again and doing things I love! I decided to do it not to get him back but to get myself back! I missed myself so much! I just love the feeling of drowing myself with self- love! I did and still do Honopono, and self love meditations. These stuffs are amazing!

When he got back from his trip, our relationship took a turn drastically!! It felt like someone put a booster in our relationship! It's so amazing! All the confusions on his part are gone! It's only been 2 months since I've been doing just self- love and Hoonopono and we've never been this happy! I've never been this content and secure in my life! The best part is the source of my happiness is not from him! I love him but you don't need him.
He loves me so much, he spoils me and he couldn't get enough of me! Now that I’ve sincerely let go of my thoughts about our wedding or about his plans for us, he is now the one who initiates topics about our future. Out of the blue, he would tell me his future plans for us. I haven't got my ring back yet but I know it's on its way! I am not even worried about it anymore on WHEN it's gonna happen or HOW because I am just happy right now. It doesn't matter how long it would take, I just know it's on its way! I know I am THE ONE and his only one! I am just very happy right now and very greatful about everything that is happening.

And also, about the hot and cold treatment, I just realized the other day that I was just reflecting that to him. I was being inconsistent on loving myself, and so he was being inconsistent of loving me too.

I hope my story will inspire other people. I love LOA, and greatful that I've found Veronica and Agnes because they've helped me not only get my specific person back but most importantly get myself back.❤️

UPDATE:
- November 2019, We got engaged a month ago to be married next year. Everything changed for the better just when I stopped fixating about being engaged, getting married and feeling bad about myself whenever I see other people getting married. His proposal actually surprised me because it happened just when I became very completely secure about myself and about our relationship whether we get married or not. I committed to loving myself and being happy. My heart if so full right now and grateful for everything❤️✨

All my gratitude to Veronica Isles, Agnes Vivarelli and Abraham Hicks for what they do. My life has changed 190 degrees because of Law of Attraction.

Last edited by may0429 (11/17/2019 4:47 am)