I think what might help is if you change your daily inner dialogue to yourself. I know you are having motivation issues and this may seem daunting, but I think if you just commit yourself to this, it’ll help you with everything in the long run. Whenever you have a bad or critical thought about yourself or your life, whenever you are being mean to yourself, say ‘no thank you’ to the thought. Instead tell yourself that there is nothing wrong with you, you are free to be who you are, anything you decide to be is ok and valid. Talk to yourself almost like a kind and loving parent would. Comfort yourself when you are feeling scared and tell yourself you can do it. And make sure to stay on top of your thoughts and catch any negative ones immediately. This will create new patterns of thinking in your mind and eventually the good inner self talk will come natural to you. Always reach to feel good. If you are not feeling good, notice what you are saying to yourself in your head.

Maybe someone else will come along and offer you different advice, but I honestly think the problems you are having are stemming from constant negative self talk. If you change this inner chatter, I think you might feel happier and as a result, get your motivation back.

Also in addition to this, make sure you’re taking care of your physical body too. Such as getting enough sleep, etc. Commit to taking care of yourself both mentally and physically and I think the life you want to have will follow

Last edited by fizzy (6/29/2019 11:39 pm)

As an update, the affirmations didn't help because I was trying to jump straight from powerlessness to feeling  powerful. Hence I just let it be and trusted the universe to bring me a solution and then, as Abraham would say, my 'cork' naturally floated to the top and I felt better once I stopped resisting the bad feelings.

It also brought greater clarity about what I want, which unearthed another negative-belief/false-premise. I always want to be 'busy' and be constantly doing something towards my goals. I have this belief that free-time and relaxation, or time with family/friends is a waste of time, and people who waste time are worthless and useless to society. During my undergrad years, I used to feel guilty or even resent myself for spending time with my friends or calling my parents. Even when my friends finally managed to get me to go out with them, 90% of my brain will be analyzing everything I could have done in that time instead, and what I should do once I get home etc. Currently I am trying to revise my undergrad topics in preparation for starting my masters in couple months, but I get impatient with myself if I think it's not going fast enough and I'd start feeling the fear and before long get into full-blown resistance. I suppose, no wonder I am scared of my own plans. I am often like an evil task-master to myself.

I am now working on telling myself that it is ok to relax or have free time or do nothing sometimes or take my time with a task - that I don't have to be frantically doing something all the time in order to be worthy or important or useful.

 

Thank you fizzy for your response and encouragement. I managed to work through (or rather allow) several fears and now am feeling way better than I have in a while. The big breakthrough was realising I CAN control how I feel - so I no longer felt powerless against my own feelings.

 

Erana wrote:

Thank you fizzy for your response and encouragement. I managed to work through (or rather allow) several fears and now am feeling way better than I have in a while. The big breakthrough was realising I CAN control how I feel - so I no longer felt powerless against my own feelings.
Yes yes and yes. I have been reading through this thread with interest. What Esther Hicks suggests, and me ;) is the gentle moving up the emotional scale all the time to reach for better feeling thoughts, So whatever you are feeling, you can always reach up just a notch to an even better feeling place.