I think you could be right to some extent. As much as feeling good, I think a big key is detachment to outcome and a quiet, unwavering belief that the thing you want will find it's way into your experience, without obsessing in timing or the how and putting all this split, muddied energy there. You just have a sense of certainty, you don't have to be on cloud nine emotionally.

Wanting but not needing (being fine with things as they are) and having a clear mind void of attachment has manifested  things in the past. I attracted a relationship close to everything I'd hoped for after I settled into near apathy after a really difficult situation. I definitely was not high on life at the time but I had shed attachment to a person that rejected me and treated me terribly, and came into a sense of independence and not being attached to being with someone to be just "fine". That relationship came into my existence so easily (almost unbelievably so) and with so little effort when I stopped caring, after probably years of me building relationships up to be such a difficult thing.

Then of course, realizing I loved that person for real, and coming to care and be attached again drove that person off and made dating seem difficult yet again.

Recently I've built up a good job and good relationship to be these difficult to attain things in my mind. Basically put them on a pedestal, and I have really good days and really bad ones. And while on the good days things seem to generally flow better, those things haven't gotten closer. Based on this and past experience it seems that it's more importantly about beliefs (x thing just comes to me, it always works out) and detachment to outcome.

A good example that seems to confirm it too is a friend who finds friendships and relationships so easily, has a thriving social life wherever he goes, and things generally work out for him wherever he puts his intentions, yet beneath the surface he's somewhat of an unhappy and unfulfilled person despite this. I think he just doesn't build up those things to be difficult, and believes things will work out for him and that's why people flock to him to where being liked is just second nature. That said, the things he does build up in his mind to be a big deal probably don't flow in in the same way so regardless of how many people surround him, he wouldn't be satisfied.

I think Abraham Hicks is right in that when something isn't working out that we want to, putting our focus elsewhere is the only thing that will resolve it (if we can't dissolve our attachment to it working out a certain way). I care deeply about having a close circle of friends and finding a partner that loves me for who I am, yet those things continually prove to be difficult to attain or keep. While my friend definitely doesn't think much of social connections, treats them like a normal, everyday thing and he finds connections left right and center. Alternately my attitude about other things allows them to flow into my life when needed (resolving money situations, material things), while he comes from a background of little money and desires it greatly because of that, and seems to find himself in debt a lot and unable to get out.

I don't think you have to maintain the highest end of the vibrational scale to have a chance of something flowing in. You just have to not care so, so much about it. The closer you can get to complete neutrality on a subject the better. If you can get to where you can just take it or leave it, it has a much greater chance of appearing than merely keeping in a super positive frame of mind while still craving/reaching for it subconsciously.

Wake Up Fulfilled puts it as "normalizing" the thing you want so it doesn't seem like such a big deal and doesn't make you anxious about the subject. Which is a great approach.

Come into belief the situation or circumstance is normal for you and you'll probably having it very quickly. Probably is a stronger approach than trying to funnel yourself into feeling great when it doesn't feel natural. The good thing is that widdling down the sensitivity and emotional triggers on a subject of desire by minimizing its importance will make you more at peace and less in anxiety cause it won't matter so dang much, so you'll generally feel better anyway and it'll feel less artificial.

Last edited by Eloquent-euphony (9/13/2018 6:29 am)

Eloquent-euphony wrote:

Wake Up Fulfilled puts it as "normalizing" the thing you want so it doesn't seem like such a big deal and doesn't make you anxious about the subject. Which is a great approach.

Exactly. Feeling like you have it already, to the point where it feels natural, is how you automatically “detach”. You don’t need to work to get yourself to a point where you are ok with not having your desire. Putting it that way doesn’t make sense. How can you desire something and simultaneously be just fine with not having it? I understand that people would argue that this just means you are not in desperation. But still, I don’t like the way that’s worded. It’s 100% ok and natural to want your desire and not be ok with not having it. The point of it all is to feel as though it’s already yours even though it isn’t physically manifested. Then you automatically become ok with “not having it”.

In reality, you have everything you desire ALREADY. It’s only an illusion that you don’t. And when a desire is born within you, it’s there to show you where you should be going next in life. As soon as you feel the desire, you should start assuming it’s already yours.

Last edited by fizzy (9/13/2018 10:04 am)

I agree about the you don’t have to feel the best all the time you can accept feeling mad or sad etc and just accept it and it removes the resistance and allows what you want to come through if you have already been doing the internal work. I do not agree that self love is not needed but that’s me I believe it is a strong foundation . We shouldn’t rely on our desires to fulfill us and make us happy. They shouldn’t be needed.

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

Eloquent-euphony wrote:

Then of course, realizing I loved that person for real, and coming to care and be attached again drove that person off and made dating seem difficult yet again.

But this is normal in a relationship, isn't it?

Oh, yes. It was just late when I wrote it out...

To clarify yes I cared and felt love for the person throughout (even today), but wasn't fully invested to where I became attached to the outcome until further on in the relationship because it took me that long to feel safe enough to think about our future. When that happened, insecurities were triggered (unaware at the time to me) because I wasn't used to having things work out when I cared about the outcome. I was then in territory where what I desired wasn't normalized. I had a subconscious belief from my past that built up abandonment issues that people I really wanted to stick around would disappear, and so that's exactly what happened. 

Prior to that when I was enjoying the ride, and taking it day by day, where I wasn't thinking too far ahead because it was fun just rediscovering love and what it felt like, was when that person was most attracted/attached to me. Wanting and needing (to alleviate anxieties) are two very different energies, and the former usually creates attraction while the latter deteriorates it, unless you can reel it in and soothe yourself without needing the other person to do it. Which is why at least when it comes to relationships, practicing self love is pretty important.

Last edited by Eloquent-euphony (9/13/2018 4:04 pm)

Selfloveiskey wrote:

fizzy wrote:

Selfloveiskey wrote:

I agree about the you don’t have to feel the best all the time you can accept feeling mad or sad etc and just accept it and it removes the resistance and allows what you want to come through if you have already been doing the internal work. I do not agree that self love is not needed but that’s me I believe it is a strong foundation . We shouldn’t rely on our desires to fulfill us and make us happy. They shouldn’t be needed.

I think you are saying what I just said above, but in different words?

And I think it is important that people realize though that we are manifesting every single second we are alive. So to say that you can’t manifest without having something is very inaccurate. Some might not actually realize this.

It’s not saying you can’t manifest without something it’s saying you can’t manifest what you want without something. You manifedt what you are not what you want so you manifedt every minute but you may not get what you want because of how you feel and what your focus is but you are still manifesting.

I agree that you won’t get what you want if your focus isn’t where it needs to be. But, all that all you ever need to manifest something, whether wanted or unwanted, is the knowing that it’s yours. Emotions are irrelevant to physically manifesting it. If you feel that you are in a relationship with someone, for example, whatever emotions you are experiencing won’t block that from manifesting. You can never attract or repel things because nothing comes to you, it comes from you. It coming to you is just an illusion. Assuming that you have a good relationship with your mother, if you began to hate yourself, wouldn’t your mother still love you? In that case you are in a bad emotional state but still manifesting another person loving you and being kind to you. In that case, self love wasn’t needed to manifest something good. Again, not knocking self love or saying it doesn’t have importance. Just getting down to the very mechanics of things and when you do you find that nothing other than ‘knowing’ is truly ever needed to manifest wanted or unwanted things.