How about not feeling anything about it at all and stopping to figuring out reasons why things happen? You are the only reason. You could just stick with what you want instead of interpreting your own creation.

authenticself wrote:

Sanshi wrote:

How about not feeling anything about it at all and stopping to figuring out reasons why things happen? You are the only reason. You could just stick with what you want instead of interpreting your own creation.

But he is just using her so he won’t give into anything sexual with me. He doesn’t actually care for her. What I desire is to be with him and to build on a new foundation of love with him.

Sanshi is right. My guy was with someone and I took the focus off them and put it on me and just creating a good vibe and on my desire and it worked . I got fearful and then he went back. But I'm doing good now and I had a great convo this weekend and he flirted with me. Most importantly I feel better. For me focusing on me and loving myself helps me to not compare myself because I am my own awesome person. focus on feeling good and focus on your desire. If you can't focus on your desire without these thoughts coming in focus on feeling better first as the feeling and belief behind thinking about your desire is important. So with this feeling you are focusing on lack. It don't matter why he is doing something what he is doing. How does that matter? You create so it doesn't! Focus on you first and the end result. Like I said if focusing on your desire is something you can't do without doubts or letting go then keep the focus on you completely and feeling better. Belief and feelings are important you manifest what you are so if you are feelful and doubtful then you manifest those .

Too much emphasis on him giving energy in the wrong place

authenticself wrote:

Selfloveiskey wrote:

authenticself wrote:

But he is just using her so he won’t give into anything sexual with me. He doesn’t actually care for her. What I desire is to be with him and to build on a new foundation of love with him.

Sanshi is right. My guy was with someone and I took the focus off them and put it on me and just creating a good vibe and on my desire and it worked . I got fearful and then he went back. But I'm doing good now and I had a great convo this weekend and he flirted with me. Most importantly I feel better. For me focusing on me and loving myself helps me to not compare myself because I am my own awesome person. focus on feeling good and focus on your desire. If you can't focus on your desire without these thoughts coming in focus on feeling better first as the feeling and belief behind thinking about your desire is important. So with this feeling you are focusing on lack. It don't matter why he is doing something what he is doing. How does that matter? You create so it doesn't! Focus on you first and the end result. Like I said if focusing on your desire is something you can't do without doubts or letting go then keep the focus on you completely and feeling better. Belief and feelings are important you manifest what you are so if you are feelful and doubtful then you manifest those .

I just think he is being unfair to her because he even said if he lost her he wouldn’t care, but if he lost me it would really make him upset. And I kinda feel responsible for it because he only is dating her because he cannot contain himself around me. He doesn’t want to treat me as an object, but as a person.

And by dating someone else it holds him back from trying anything on me and forces him to connect with me as a person. I don’t think she is better than me because he is using her. And my therapist said he wouldn’t feel so guilty about the urges if he didn’t actually love me. Which I was thinking myself, so I learned that something that helps is to look within yourself and find the doubt patterns and replace them with positive affirmations. Cuz beliefs stem from habitual thinking. I keep lacking faith that my specific person will never come to terms with the fact that he loves me more than he thinks.

You don't seem to be showing any evidence that you have listened and applied any of the advice and direction you have been given in previous threads.

All of your writings are simply self indulgent distraction from actually doing the work.

If you are going to ask for advice you need to listen - absorb it and apply it. Otherwise you are simply wasting other's time and energy.

This thread is the same as your previous threads just repackaged in the form of a new story.

If you want him - do the work - drop the victim mentality - stop observing your current reality - and make steps to create the desired reality.

Sorry if this sounds harsh but there comes a point on the manifesting journey when you simply need to do the work - no ifs or buts. Just dig deep and start moving

Last edited by Oasiscalm (2/08/2018 1:01 pm)

authenticself wrote:

Oasiscalm wrote:

authenticself wrote:

I just think he is being unfair to her because he even said if he lost her he wouldn’t care, but if he lost me it would really make him upset. And I kinda feel responsible for it because he only is dating her because he cannot contain himself around me. He doesn’t want to treat me as an object, but as a person.

And by dating someone else it holds him back from trying anything on me and forces him to connect with me as a person. I don’t think she is better than me because he is using her. And my therapist said he wouldn’t feel so guilty about the urges if he didn’t actually love me. Which I was thinking myself, so I learned that something that helps is to look within yourself and find the doubt patterns and replace them with positive affirmations. Cuz beliefs stem from habitual thinking. I keep lacking faith that my specific person will never come to terms with the fact that he loves me more than he thinks.

You don't seem to be showing any evidence that you have listened and applied any of the advice and direction you have been given in previous threads.

All of your writings are simply self indulgent distraction from actually doing the work.

If you are going to ask for advice you need to listen - absorb it and apply it. Otherwise you are simply wasting other's time and energy.

This thread is the same as your previous threads just repackaged in the form of a new story.

If you want him - do the work - drop the victim mentality - stop observing your current reality - and make steps to create the desired reality.

The advice is to focus on myself, I know that. My problem is not that I don’t do the work because I have been doing that work because I NEED to. I suffer from PTSD and I don’t want it to doninate my life. Let’s take the spotlight off of him and put it back on me. So here is my problem.....I live in a toxic household I am trying to move out of, I try to seperate myself from them while I am still here and do the work, it’s harder though because they see my medications and journaling as a waste of time, I have no support for who I am as a person here and trying to be my own support system, they call me retarded and a loser and it’s hard to drown out when I deal with it on a day to day basis, I try so hard to block it out because they don’t know me. I had surrounded myself with negative people and only started surrounding myself with more positive ones.

I can think more clearly and come up with how to improve myself. Self love is key, love that one of you have that as a name. Cuz it is true, the whole basis of my life so far has been lack of self love. No one is wasting their time speaking with me, I tried a meditation to clear any problems and I used between my mother and I. I can not force her to change, but I want so badly to lead by example. I feel like my mothers problem with me is that like her I am a creative, but I did not get pregnant and have the potential to go down the career path of my choice. She had to stop everything when she had me, so it bothers her that I get to go further than her.

I love to give more than receive, but I feel so useless when I cannot. Cuz I always want to give and empower, and I am TRYING. I am not over here just like life sucks, i am trying to make peace with myself. The battle between my doubts and my intuition has to stop. I am trying to let my intuition lead me, learn to trust it because everything there makes perfect sense and I always feel magnetizing pulls from wonderful opportunities. I will be going to an art therapy function because that is my career of interest. Our creative minds are what creates.....I love having fun with energy. I been able to see it since I was a little girl, but learned later that is what it is. Yeah, I am not a hopeless case, I am worth more than that.

 
I lived in a horribly toxic environment where I was caught in the middle and was treated extremely badly and very abusively. Until I could get out of there I ignored the abusive people and paid them not a blind bit of notice no matter what they said or did, and believe me, it was horrible, but I gave tbem no power to hurt my feelings or to make me feel bad about myself in any way. They didn't matter one iota to me. They were and are meaningless nothings. Don't give those toxic people any more power over you than you've already given them. Take your power back.