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12/11/2017 8:27 am  #21


Re: Funny!

Laura1234 wrote:

thanks Sanshi, I already understand, I hope :D ..and no, I no dropping self love, because it wont bring me my desire, I want have a selflove because I know that I will feel better and I see a few days since I focus on yourself and I want be happy alone too,

That's the attitude, girl.

Laura1234 wrote:

so I really feel better, but I was confused when you wrote that you didnt happy and didint love myself etc and you had a good relationship 3 years.

Yeah, because I knew he loved me (even when I couldn't understand why, because I didn't love myself) and he did, I knew he would do everything for me and he did. And at some point (which came down to my missing self love of course) I started telling him that he didn't love me, when he wasn't acting according to my will. That worked for a while, I manipulated him in doing what I wanted him to do. But I believed that this wouldn't work anymore after a while and at some point, he didn't conform to my will anymore which I interpreted as evidence for him not loving me anymore (which was crap btw. He even told a friend of him that he loved me while I was in the room shortly before we broke up -> so I believed in it even though the physical evidences highly suggested otherwise) and I started to believe in what I affirmed. I started to believe that he would break up with me. I remember a day shortly before our breakup. I was showering and I felt exaclty as I would feel had I broken up with him. It was this terrible feeling nobody of us wants to have. And I had it before anything has happened. A week later, the state I was feeling became a reality.
And when I talk about feeling, I don't mean emotion. I mean feeling something to be real. I felt the breakup real. I did exactly the opposite of what people here have to do in order to get their person. Feeling good comes potentially as a reaction to being in the right state of consciousness. But feeling good doesn't automatically mean that you are in the right state of consciousness. Abraham say that you can be happy about your dog and your man comes, but that's not true in my experience. In the two years I am doing this, it never happens to me that an area of my life I was feeling strong negative emotions about was messing up the rest of my life, never! And also the other way around didn't happen for me. I was very happy about an England trip, I was in bliss one full week and nothing happened towards the guy I wanted to that time, even though I didn't think about him the whole week and no other good thing happened either.


"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."

Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
 

12/11/2017 10:31 am  #22


Re: Funny!

So what is the role of self love in bringing a relationship to you & being in one? Does it even play a role? I always thought you had to love yourself in order for others to reflect that love back to you. That isn’t the case?

 

12/11/2017 11:28 am  #23


Re: Funny!

I wanted to come in and share the states I were in when I attracted my lover back twice before because I think it fits the theme of this thread.Β (During these times I didn't know about LOA)

1. The first time he ended things with me, saying he needed time to himself. I begged and pleaded and that didn't work (now I know it never was going to work). For about a month I tried so hard to focus on myself and do things for me. (we weren't in contact during this month). I didn't do this to bring him back. I did it because I wanted to feel better and to me focusing on myself and moving on was going help me heal and get over it. I wasn't perfect at doing this and was still upset often. Then one day, I was hanging out with my family, not doing anything special at all, and said "you know what, I'm happy." In that moment, for the first time in a long time, I was unconditionally happy. That day he contacted me.Β 

2. The second time he ended things I was a COMPLETE MESS. I cried allll the time and felt hopeless. Just getting through the day was a struggle. Then one day I contacted a psychic who said we were "meant to be." I paid $300 for a 'cleansing'. Right before I went to bed I was to sit in a salt bath, hold an earth stone (whatever the heck that is), and light a white candle while visualizing being happy with him (she provided all of the materials). After two or three baths (I can't remember) he came back and was saying/doing all of the things I had wanted, but not how I had visualized. I didn't care though because he was back. I wasn't in a state of total bliss or extreme self love. Although I did let go because I somewhat believed that everything was going to work.Β Β 

I wrote all of that to say, I don't think there's a concrete formula for this ish. I don't have the answers. I don't know if there is one solid answer. Self love will probably keep them around though. That's what I was lacking before and so my insecurities and doubts manifested him continuously leaving.Β 

 

12/11/2017 4:31 pm  #24


Re: Funny!

Sanshi wrote:

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

So what would you say DOES work Sanshi? I'm talking about a full, rounded, happy life, not getting an ex (though that may be included in the good, positive life)!
Β 

I try to bring that across in every post I wrote since I am here again. I explained it in detail with examples. And it doesn't matter, if it is for a person or whatever. There is only one way the Law operates.

Selfloveiskey wrote:

I don't really understand what you are saying sanshi . I have manifested a lot of stuff and I feel it happened because of self love and being in a higher vibration.
That works for me so I'm gonna have to disagree but what works for some may not work for others

Well, it's called a Law. What's special about a law? It works for everyone. So if self love were the key, then it had to work for everyone. But it doesn't. It's like taking a pill. When you take a pill and you believe that this pill makes you healthy, it will. You will go on a health forum and write someone with your problem "Hey, try this pill. It works". But lets say the other person already tried similar pills and is already discouraged. She is like "Okay, I don't have anything to lose. Lets try it", but she doesn't really believe in it. And guess what? It doesn't work for her.
It's the same thing with self love and feeling happy and doing vision boards. When you fully believe that this will solve your problem, it will. But someone who doesn't believe that it will bring their person back won't have any success with it. Self love, happiness and all that stuff is great, but it has nothing to do with manifesting. It's a means else it would work for everyone. And thinking the other way around, people who do not love themselves or aren't happy shouldn't get anything good out of life and that isn't the case either. I attracted the love of my life to me, when I wasn't happy and didn't love myself and we were together for nearly three years. why? Because I believed that guys were attracted to me even though I didn't thought myself to be attractive. Further. I thought that only the guys I would really like would be attracted to me and about this specific guy, I believed that he wouldn't leave me no matter what. Before he broke up, I started doubting this. But in all of this, there was more self hate than self love involed and more depression than happiness (while we didn't see each other. When we did, everything was good).
When self love and happiness works for you, that's great. Use this means. Doesn't really matter, if you take the direct route or if you believe something to be the thing/method to bring you everything you want. But the Law lies behind all this. Self love is great, happiness is great and everybody should work on loving themselves and being happy, but it has nothing to do with manifesting specific things. When you are in a happy state, it will bring you more happy circumstances, but not necessarily the one you want.

The reason why it seems that different things work for different people isn't that the Law is inconsistent. It's because different techniques evoke the SAME FEELING in different people. It's like learning types. Some people are auditorial, some are visual. It doesn't matter which way thy go. There end goal is the same, learning the material. It's the same with LoA. It's the same thing with LoA. The end goal is to believe.


IlunaMeisu wrote:

Thank you! Sanshi isn't mean she means well. I used to be those types in the very beginning when it comes to signs, now I just say thank you along with a giggle and carry out my day.

I'm happy being with me and I have goals to achieve to. Just wanted to share a little cheer up.

Thank you. Yeah, synchronicities are fun, if you see them as prove for your manifestation skills and not as sign for something that is going to happen.

My take on this is ..

When we talk about delibrate creating there is fundamentally only one state that brings about manifestations and that's your core belief. It's what you belief the universe will deliver to you.

You only need belief. Start with faith, move to confidence,  then amp it up to unshakeable belief.

When you strip back all LOA teachings they are all built in one fundamental premise and that's BELIEF. Neville is the most stripped back form of LOA because he takes the stance just believe, believe, believe.

Abe basic three step method Ask, Believe, Receive. You can't get your manifestation with belief.

But as most will know just believing or having faith is difficult. It's hard to look at the lack in front of you and get yourself to belief that with your mental focus you can turn that lack into abundance. And that's where all the processes come into play.

When people first read the secret they all manifest the car park or the free coffee. That's easy that's when you have no resistance and you are open to receiving. But when it moves to manifesting the return of an ex it becomes hard. Because you don't have the confidence or the openness needed.

Every process is a tool designed to turn a switch within you from uncertainty to certainty. And each person needs to work through multiple processes and tools to find what works for them. Some will take you half way then you find something else to move you further to the place of confidence and belief.

Self love is a good tool - but I would say that it's been mis-sold to many LOa followers trying to get an ex back. So it's easy to say to someone who is in despair "oh honey you need to love yourself first" or "you want that person because you don't love yourself enough". When in fact it's an incomplete solution. Self love is an important skill we all need to learn - we all need to learn how to love ourselves and how to soothe ourselves and how to find acceptance in ourselves and not seek it from an outside source. But is it blanket process to get an ex back?? I'm not convinced. Just like I not convinced that every person who wants an ex back is extraordinary low on self love and self worth.

For manifesting "self - belief" drives things forward more than self love. And maybe the two are intimately intertwined. But to manifest successfully one has to be able to stand in front of a mirror and say "I want what I want and I will have as I so desire" and they need to mean it and belief it.

As for signs - if a sign makes you fell good in that moment then use that feeling to add to you faith account. "Signs" also can serve as a good indicator of where you are in regards to your alignment with your desire. If your see something and think "it's so close I can taste it" -  then you are close. But don't go out looking for signs. If seeing a sign give u a nugget of faith then take it and run with it. Whatever builds your faith you can use - but you faith must always be built on a solid foundation and signs are just indicators.

Use this time to reflect on your life. Look at areas of your life with things flow easily to you. Ask yourself why you do well in those areas of your life and it will likely because you have a core belief that things will work out.

 

12/12/2017 1:41 am  #25


Re: Funny!

So it’s more like self love can help a relationship to go better, but it’s not a necessary component to manifest a relationship with someone or keep it with them? It all depends on what you believe about the relationship regardless of how much self love you have.

 

12/12/2017 5:29 am  #26


Re: Funny!

Sanshi wrote:

Laura1234 wrote:

thanks Sanshi, I already understand, I hope :D ..and no, I no dropping self love, because it wont bring me my desire, I want have a selflove because I know that I will feel better and I see a few days since I focus on yourself and I want be happy alone too,

That's the attitude, girl.

Laura1234 wrote:

so I really feel better, but I was confused when you wrote that you didnt happy and didint love myself etc and you had a good relationship 3 years.

Yeah, because I knew he loved me (even when I couldn't understand why, because I didn't love myself) and he did, I knew he would do everything for me and he did. And at some point (which came down to my missing self love of course) I started telling him that he didn't love me, when he wasn't acting according to my will. That worked for a while, I manipulated him in doing what I wanted him to do. But I believed that this wouldn't work anymore after a while and at some point, he didn't conform to my will anymore which I interpreted as evidence for him not loving me anymore (which was crap btw. He even told a friend of him that he loved me while I was in the room shortly before we broke up -> so I believed in it even though the physical evidences highly suggested otherwise) and I started to believe in what I affirmed. I started to believe that he would break up with me. I remember a day shortly before our breakup. I was showering and I felt exaclty as I would feel had I broken up with him. It was this terrible feeling nobody of us wants to have. And I had it before anything has happened. A week later, the state I was feeling became a reality.
And when I talk about feeling, I don't mean emotion. I mean feeling something to be real. I felt the breakup real. I did exactly the opposite of what people here have to do in order to get their person. Feeling good comes potentially as a reaction to being in the right state of consciousness. But feeling good doesn't automatically mean that you are in the right state of consciousness. Abraham say that you can be happy about your dog and your man comes, but that's not true in my experience. In the two years I am doing this, it never happens to me that an area of my life I was feeling strong negative emotions about was messing up the rest of my life, never! And also the other way around didn't happen for me. I was very happy about an England trip, I was in bliss one full week and nothing happened towards the guy I wanted to that time, even though I didn't think about him the whole week and no other good thing happened either.

Β 
OK, but if this all is about a believe that some technique works, so when I will believe some technique so I attract him back? I wiil have a selflove, I will happy alone and I will believe that this works when I want him back or I will believe what say Abraham that I  can be happy about my  dog and my man comes, so for me will works because I believe and for you  it dont will works, because you donr believe?
You write that you was happy about trip and it didnt attract back your love. I was on the holiday too and I was decided forgot to him and I was happy that I m far away and I deleted every thought about him, but  I feel negative about him and when I come back from holiday so even thought he was unblocked me and texted me, even thought that I didnt think positive on him and I was focus only on me and place where I was and on people with who I was and I was really decided forgot to him and hated him  all my life..
and I think a many people who probably dont know loa were  attracted someone back, when they move on and wanted forgot to him and they was sure that he /,she never come back ..so Im not sure that this is just about our beliefs and thwt jus selflove and focus on yourself dont will  work.. because is so many stories that people come back when they dont wait that they will back.

Last edited by Laura1234 (12/12/2017 5:29 am)

 

12/12/2017 8:16 am  #27


Re: Funny!

yellowrose wrote:

So what is the role of self love in bringing a relationship to you & being in one? Does it even play a role? I always thought you had to love yourself in order for others to reflect that love back to you. That isn’t the case?

My experience is that I just need to know that someone loves me for them to love me. But I think it's easier to maintain a relationship with a good portion of self love and of course you will be way happier.

AnythingIsPossible wrote:

I wrote all of that to say, I don't think there's a concrete formula for this ish. I don't have the answers. I don't know if there is one solid answer. Self love will probably keep them around though. That's what I was lacking before and so my insecurities and doubts manifested him continuously leaving.

It's always a little tricky to go back to a non LoA time and interpret what you did then, because you weren't fully aware of it and can't remember what you did and felt. I attracted an ex back years ago without knowing anything about LoA. My mother just said that she didn't believe that he is gone for good and I trusted her and focused completely on the exams I had at that time. It worked fast, but I don't know what exactly I did back then. what I know for sure is that I didn't work on self love or on myself or on my happiness. I just panicked because of my exams. The reason why I think that there is a formula is because the success rates in different places seem to be different. On this forum, it's very very low. But I know other communities where it looks really different. They don't talk about self love, raising vibration or vision boards and within the past few days I read two stories about people finding their dream home. They seem to do something right.

Laura1234 wrote:

OK, but if this all is about a believe that some technique works, so when I will believe some technique so I attract him back? I wiil have a selflove, I will happy alone and I will believe that this works when I want him back or I will believe what say Abraham that I can be happy about my dog and my man comes, so for me will works because I believe and for you it dont will works, because you donr believe?
You write that you was happy about trip and it didnt attract back your love. I was on the holiday too and I was decided forgot to him and I was happy that I m far away and I deleted every thought about him, but I feel negative about him and when I come back from holiday so even thought he was unblocked me and texted me, even thought that I didnt think positive on him and I was focus only on me and place where I was and on people with who I was and I was really decided forgot to him and hated him all my life..
and I think a many people who probably dont know loa were attracted someone back, when they move on and wanted forgot to him and they was sure that he /,she never come back ..so Im not sure that this is just about our beliefs and thwt jus selflove and focus on yourself dont will work.. because is so many stories that people come back when they dont wait that they will back.

Well, you obviously doesn't fully believe in that techniques, else you wouldn't be around anymore. So what's the point of that question?

It isn't very helpful to look at what happens to other people,because you never know what happened in their mind. I don't like the term belief too much. I prefer state. I think you just need to move into a state and then drop it. If you really were there for a short moment and then drop it completely and don't think about it again, it will come. Not thinking about it includes not noticing that you aren't in the state. Abraham say "Your vibration is where you last left it". I think it's the same thing in different words. I felt myself sleeping in a student dorm and a few weeks later, I felt the urge of applying for an apartment and I got it with light speed. I never wanted to live in a student dorm before..lol. So much to say about free will. I just felt myself there and when I stopped imagining, I wasn't like "oh, but that wasn't real. I wasn't really there". Just feeling it for a moment and then dropping it worked for me every single time with the strangest things. It wasn't that I had an unshakable belief. It just was the way it was in that moment. I don't have an unshakable belief that I am a psychology student. It's just what I am. It feels normal, it's completely natural. I don't believe in it. I know it to be true. Neville says that it has to feel natural and that's what he means by it.
Back to your examples. When you move on, chances are that you start to see the person in a different light again. When I think about some exes, I think "we had a nice time back then". After the breakup, that wasn't at all what I was thinking. I had good reasons why I ended things with them. Now, I can think about that people and feel good about the time we had. When you loose yourself in those thoughts, it can happen that you fall into the state of being with them unknowingly. Because you don't try to attract them anymore, you drop the thoughts about them shortly after and doesn't think about them anymore for a month or two. Well, "your vibration is where you last left it" and when the last state you were in in relation to them was that of being in a happy relationship with them, of course they will contact you.
And waiting will never bring you results anyway, because when you wait for something, it implies that you don't have it. That's your state and you won't get anything that isn't in accordance with your state.


"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."

Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
 

12/12/2017 9:47 pm  #28


Re: Funny!

Sanshi wrote:

My experience is that I just need to know that someone loves me for them to love me.

I think this actually makes a lot of sense. All of what you said does. It’s too bad there aren’t really specific person programs out there with this way of thinking behind them.

 

12/13/2017 3:17 am  #29


Re: Funny!

yellowrose wrote:

Sanshi wrote:

My experience is that I just need to know that someone loves me for them to love me.

I think this actually makes a lot of sense. All of what you said does. It’s too bad there aren’t really specific person programs out there with this way of thinking behind them.

Why do you need a program, when the formula is always the same? Read Neville. All others feel just like a watered down versions of him who distort the whole picture.


"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."

Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
 

12/13/2017 9:09 am  #30


Re: Funny!

I know mine does and he is already here so not to worry about it.

I keep getting more gifts and money woohoo! It's been very awesome.


I am blessed and loved.

LJ + K forever!
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