1 of 1- MissMiles906
- Contributor
Offline - Registered: 2/12/2017
- Posts: 52
Feeling Defeated
So me and my guy were doing great and all of a sudden no contact again...for a week now. Nothing went wrong.
I messaged him it breaks my heart to be ignored or only be available when he needs something. I asked him if that's what this is or isn't, letting me know would be appreciated....I got no reply.
Just a week ago he seemed to into me and being in my kids life, I honestly feel like I can't breathe. Like we broke up all over again.
I'm a true catch. I know this about myself, so why wouldn't he want to stay and me wih me? He always says it's not me but work and his fear. But hurting me makes more sense than work through it.
I'm afraid. I'm sad. I'm struggling trying to get back to positive thinking. Any suggestions, any ideas, any help.. I dont know how to refocus. It's so painful.
- Selfloveiskey
- Genius
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- Registered: 8/18/2017
- Posts: 968
Re: Feeling Defeated
MissMiles906 wrote:
So me and my guy were doing great and all of a sudden no contact again...for a week now. Nothing went wrong.
I messaged him it breaks my heart to be ignored or only be available when he needs something. I asked him if that's what this is or isn't, letting me know would be appreciated....I got no reply.
Just a week ago he seemed to into me and being in my kids life, I honestly feel like I can't breathe. Like we broke up all over again.
I'm a true catch. I know this about myself, so why wouldn't he want to stay and me wih me? He always says it's not me but work and his fear. But hurting me makes more sense than work through it.
I'm afraid. I'm sad. I'm struggling trying to get back to positive thinking. Any suggestions, any ideas, any help.. I dont know how to refocus. It's so painful.
First focus on you. Do things that make you happy. I understand you want him but if you really thought you were a great catch you wouldn't care as much and would be more secure. You are looking to him for love when you can find it in you. Focus on you not what he was doing. Get yourself back. It seems like you are all wrapped up in him. Focus on you takenit day by day . Do self love highly recommend the book love yourself like your life depends on it. It's amazing how much things change when you are truly happy with yourself and people gravitate to that. Right now it appears you were looking to him for self validation . I'm not saying we can't be upset but think about and reflect how you have been feeling lately. Cause if you had been "needing him" then that vibe can make them run.
- MissMiles906
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- Registered: 2/12/2017
- Posts: 52
Re: Feeling Defeated
I appreciate your reply. And would've agreed with you if it were a few years ago, but it's not that I'm wrapped up in him or don't love myself, it's that the merry go round bugs my life!
My immediate life is my kid and I. We are building, we are living, we have great friends, and she's cute as she is smart.
Dating not an issue, nor are friendships or dating men.
He and i have been friends for close to ten years. HE has not committed a soul since me and that's when I was 22. I'm currently 35.
When we broke up his world changed. I miscarried twins, his father died, his mother has cancer and he is the man of that family. So he financially, emotionally, and physically with drawls and stress all the time.
Outside his family, I'm sincerely the only person he will share those talks with where maybe it should be tgem or a therapist sender puts his LIFE on hold.
Things for me keep going because I AM a catch, but it doesn't change he has my heart.
It's not always us that loses our loves because of our "down falls." His issues and my focus on building more for my daughter and my life clash often and once it gets good or I'm single or he is doing well in life, he comes back. This time I gave it a chance all year and unfortunately his mom got sick again and gone he went for two months.
This time he was back all November...got a new assignment with his department, things were looking good...and NOW we are back to a disappearance.
The trouble is LOA works for me attracting love or men. But he is already attracted, his life isn't something I can manifest for him. And that's were my emotions lie.
I am a girl who loves a boy at the end of the day no matter how I word it...but i totally love me and my kid above all!
But if I'm honest I don't know that I can do LOA for him. He has to do it for himself to attract the things he needs in his life to feel like he has one and us financially secure and knows he IS NOT his father and he has to create boundaries so he can enjoy his life too...make sense?
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Thread StarterVeronica Isles LOA coach veronicaislescoaching.com