Veronica's Law of Attraction Forum » I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

Shivani_LOAbeliever · 11/27/2017 11:18 am

Hello all the you wonderful people,

First of all I want to express gratitude to this community and all the like minded people who believe in the Universe and it's infinite blessings. I am a newbie to LOA myself and it all started in Mar 2017 when I lost my lover (I hate to use the word ex). My lover and I were together for 3 yrs and the first year of our relationship was blissful. We both have similar belief system, we're both from similar backgrounds. The only issue was (for family mostly) that I have masters and he never went to college and didn't have a stable career. Anyways our relationship got very rocky last year, there were lots of fights both verbal and physical abuse, we broke up and made up numerous times. Then mar 2017 we had the worst fight of our life. It came from a place of insecurity for me and alcohol got the best of us (like always). So my lover broke up with me in Mar '17 and didn't talk to me for 2.5 months; it's absolutely heart breaking time of my life. That's when I discovered LOA and Veronica's 25 day challenge videos along with Abraham Hicks and her trainings. My lover cam back into my life in May. In the meantime I had taken counseling to control my anger, to avoid having expectations and most importantly learn to be happy from within.

My lover and I started off fresh in May 2017 and before you know it, we were engaged mid July. Things couldn't be more perfect. Sure there were couple fights here and there where like always he first threatened to leave but reconciled on the spot. We had a big fight in Aug (my fault) and I took accountability for my actions. Since then I've tried my best to not let alcohol take over my emotions. So fast forward to Oct we got into another silly fight on Halloween weekend which got really blown out of proportion. I mean cops were called because he assumed we were gonna get into physical fight which was not the case. So anyways he cut me off completely for two weeks; he texted a word or two here and there but nothing more. Then Nov 10th was when we both met face to face and talked things through. We both agreed that it's something that got blown out of proportion, we both agreed to try harder on our relationship. He hung up the phone on his friend that night saying "I can't talk I am with my fiance". He always called me his wifey in the past but more so after the engagement. Everything was fine until Nov 17th when he cut me off again completely. My parents were coming the following day so I figured he wanted to avoid the conversation about cops and hence is putting up the facade. My parents left for India yesterday (11/26). I spoke to his family on the 25th and his mom told me he said he don't want to go forward with this wedding. I was in pure shock and despair. I tried to reach out to him and he told me the same thing on the texts. he said he is done with my anger my mouth (foul language from past) and don't want to live his life like that. We haven't had any aggressive fights in for ever. When asked where is this coming from, he goes it is 3yrs in the making. Clearly out of blue he went down the memory lane and is thinking about all the fights. I will blame myself for it though, I had this fear that he will call off the wedding and MY WORST NIGHTMARES CAME TO LIFE :'((
He is so loving, caring, kind, little childish at times with his walking out situation but overall a great guy with good heart. I have seen the love and so has he from each other. I manifested him after that horrendous fight and now even after nothing happened I lost him again.
I want to ask all you lovely people out there that what should I do now. He deleted our engagement pics had blocked me on social media after that oct fight and didn't add me back even after we reconciled (so I thought) everything on Nov 17th. We were looking at wedding venues, caterers, and our reception outfits are already made in India. I don't know where his head is at. I keep telling himself that I'm trying everyday to prove him i'm a changed person and will continue to do so for us. I wish he took accountability for his actions too but that's where the childishness comes from.
He is the love of my life, when we are together it's the best feeling in the whole wide world. I need my lover back and I am willing to do whatever it takes. we are both leos I'm Aug 6th (29yrs old) and he is Aug 9th (30 yr old) born. I see 69/96s everywhere I look. My heart tells me even though things are so awful looking at the moment, he will be back. Our love outweighs all odds I have manifested him twice before and I will do so again. I just don't know how and when; someone please help!

Thank you! God Bless you all :'(

Pink Ribbon Ninja · 11/28/2017 4:17 am

Dear Shivani, hugs to you. :')

You've manifested him before, so you can do it again!
I know it's hard, I got my ups and down before, and I still remember my hard moments too. But I also try to remember that I've manifested good things too! Things can get better.

It's okay to take baby steps. Comfort yourself, and you can start your journey again when you're ready and feeling better.

Please please please believe that you can manifest him back again, but first, you have to feel good, or at least feel okay. Or feel better.

And sometimes the challenge is to be at peace with your self, and with the current moment. Be at peace and forgive yourself (that's my challange too 😅)
Sometimes it's challenging, but of course it can be done.

Best love and energy for you. ❤

Shivani_LOAbeliever · 11/28/2017 9:35 am

Thank you "Pink Ribbon Ninja", this is the first thing I saw when I woke up and it lit my face! I spent the night at friend's, and felt such great energy at her house. I visualized him with me and my heart was filled gratitude and pure belief that he will be back. I know we're not supposed to stalk, wonder and let go, but I did goto his Facebook & Snapchat account and yes he changed his cover picture but didn't the one he had of him and I on facebook. He only have 3-4 pictures of me on his instagram (less than 50 posts total), and they were still there. I know I don't want to hold on to false hope, but seeing that gave me a little comfort, although I won't be disheartened God forbid if he does something otherwise. I made an honest prayer to universe again this morning and sure enough saw "69" again. I have not a single doubt in my heart that my lover will be back soon and this time with a stronger better relationship than ever before.
Are there any specific visualizations, affirmations I should use? I am very anxious at heart and am too attached to the outcome :'( I'm scared to loose him forever. I try to negate those feelings with positive memories of ours, but how can I avoid the anxiety, fear and overcome the heartbreak for now?

Pink Ribbon Ninja · 11/28/2017 11:57 pm

Shivani_LOAbeliever wrote:
Thank you "Pink Ribbon Ninja", this is the first thing I saw when I woke up and it lit my face! I spent the night at friend's, and felt such great energy at her house. I visualized him with me and my heart was filled gratitude and pure belief that he will be back. I know we're not supposed to stalk, wonder and let go, but I did goto his Facebook & Snapchat account and yes he changed his cover picture but didn't the one he had of him and I on facebook. He only have 3-4 pictures of me on his instagram (less than 50 posts total), and they were still there. I know I don't want to hold on to false hope, but seeing that gave me a little comfort, although I won't be disheartened God forbid if he does something otherwise. I made an honest prayer to universe again this morning and sure enough saw "69" again. I have not a single doubt in my heart that my lover will be back soon and this time with a stronger better relationship than ever before.
Are there any specific visualizations, affirmations I should use? I am very anxious at heart and am too attached to the outcome :'( I'm scared to loose him forever. I try to negate those feelings with positive memories of ours, but how can I avoid the anxiety, fear and overcome the heartbreak for now?

I think you can use any affirmations that feel comfortable for you, only you know what it is. :D
So it is with visualizations. But you want to do it when you feel relax and calm. It's better not to force affirmations or visualizations when it feels bad or terrible.

Another thing is, we tend to obsess a lot when the situation comes to this. Being mindful of our thinking and feeling is important, then you want to train your mind (simply by ignoring it, or doing other things that make you feel better or happy) slowly. Veronica has a lot of videos about it, and you may want to start 25 Days Challenge as soon as you're ready. :D
And doing self-love helps a lot.

I'm still learning, but I hope it can help. :D

Gratitude21 · 11/29/2017 4:20 am

Hi Shivani,

I read your story and feel bad how crestfallen you sound. Firstly, give yourself some credit that you did manifest him before, even after a bad fight. So, you do have it in you to do it again. Trust yourself.
I also get a feeling that your belief in yourself is wavering. Don’t let that happen. But you really need to work on yourself first. If you get angry easily and when down with alcohol use foul language, that definitely is a sign of lack of self love. My suggestion is to first work on yourself before you start working on manifesting him. Do a lot of self love affirmations. Meditation is very important for you to help you calm down.
I’ve done something similar in my relationship, I.e. spoiled it due to my uncontrollable anger and language. Nowadays I’m working only on myself. I meditate everyday and I repeatedly tell myself that I love myself. I do things which make me happy. I treat myself to movies or lunch. I know that as soon as my vibrations are up, things will work out for the best. Although I’m no longer trying to manifest my ex back as I figured out that we are two different people wanting different things, so my case is different.
And as for 69, I used to see that too...do you know what it means...take a look. Maybe it helps.
http://sacredscribesangelnumbers.blogspot.in/2011/07/angel-number-69.html?m=1

All the best to you!

Shivani_LOAbeliever · 11/29/2017 2:15 pm

Gratitude21Superhero Thank you so much for your kind words and sharing your story. I agree with you 100% on self love and working on myself piece. I have actually gone for therapies and counseling in the past (after our Mar) fight, and am a much better person now. Yes, ofcourse I am not completely transformed, but I have brought forth a lot of positive changes within myself. I think my lover (i will never use the word "ex" ) is so focused on the past even when he saw the positive changes he is refusing to believe things are any different. I only had one incident since we got together when alcohol got the best of me. But yes I still need to work on the anger piece. My lover on the other hand stayed the same person, walked out on me, paid attention to other women in front of me, didn't really come even around me and showed me love in the presence of his friends. I am not saying I had trust issues, I guess I just wanted him to be bit attentive to me. See with me I've lived all my life alone (college then moved for work away from home) and my parents were always mostly in India. When I met him and got the love I always longed for (my exs did love me but we never lasted this long), for me it was MINE. I didn't want him to share my love with anyone else. It's like asking a kid to share their favorite toy with someone else. No he's not a toy and yes he should love and care for others. I guess I just wanted to not feel left out and get the same attention other men gave their women. Anyways I tried working on that piece, never fought with him instead calmly tried to explain. I didn't get into any drunk fights, and always wanted to communicate my worries. Him on the other hand has never been the guy who communicated, he still remained the one who rather walk out than work on the issues and repeated the same behaviors over and over. I used to be naggy in the past but i stopped that completely! I mean when we say self love and change yourself, I literally transformed myself for the good. And now a small fight was blown out of proportion ASSUMING THE PAST and he has called off the wedding because he is re-thinking everything negative from the past.
We both made our fair share of mistakes but at the end after every fight we did get back together. Since mar was the first time I truly transformed myself. I know free will plays a big role in all this but I also know how much he loves me. He even has mentioned several times in the past that I'm his first ever true real relationship, that he is working towards our future and that he can not live without me. All I would love for him to do is to focus on the positive changes I brought in myself in the current time-frame, I could never go back and change the past. YES I am going to FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT OF FAITH again and MANIFEST HIM BACK AGAIN
I was watching Veronica's videos and she said if you see something that means something to you take it as your sign. The Universe doesn't have a book of signs and it's symbolism. That "69" got me worried a little I see it happening now but for me it is our birthdays <3 I am August 6th born and he is August 9th; hence the 69. Even last time I saw 69s, same cars as his before he came back. That took 2.5months and I am going to keep my faith and believe that it will happen this time around too! I will manifest my soulmate again against all odds, he is the true love of my life and I am his. I am so very grateful to this forum, the stories give me so much hope and strength to never give us and doubt the universe.

barbidoll · 11/29/2017 4:57 pm

My Dear
You will manifest him back   What you need to do is not think about any of the behaviors and actions that lead to your break up    What we think about   what we say and our core beliefs all can bring us wonder and joy    or break up and heartache
Use your time now   to reinvent yourself    all the foul language fighting   jealousy and negative thought is holding you back      Obsessions over past problems will make them repeat
Wake up in the morning   and make a gratitude list before you get out of bed    Find things to love every hour and be grateful for them    just as a homing pigeon always returns   so will your lover as he will desire you as you desire him
Presently I am working on self love     I was raised unloved and unwanted   and never knew comfort or security     I realize now ( at an extremely old age to be alone )   that I have been repeating my relationships with different men my whole life     the same situation   the same breakup   uncanny unless you understand LOA    I have been manifesting the same situation over and over   because in my heart I was anticipating the rejection   the abandonment
I know he will be back   and all will be well    live in joy as much as you can

Shivani_LOAbeliever · 11/29/2017 5:05 pm

@Pink Ribbon Ninja thank you thank you thank you!!!! Yes I have started the 25 day challenge; I only watched youtube videos last time, but this time around I am gonna do the exercises.

The only thing that gets me is the anxiety that now his whole family probably supports him too bc they are judging from the past as well and wouldn't that also effect his free will? Meaning around like minded people who agree with him (they've always supported every good bad ugly decision of his), and wouldn't that never really get him to not miss me and ponder on the love and beautiful memories we shared? I no nothing is impossible for Universe for that God so I am going to continue to stay positive, try to keep calm, visualize and affirm!

I have asked, I have faith/belief he will be back; so the universe has no other choice but to give!

Stay Blessed!!

Shivani_LOAbeliever · 11/30/2017 9:24 am

barbidoll wrote:
My Dear
You will manifest him back   What you need to do is not think about any of the behaviors and actions that lead to your break up    What we think about   what we say and our core beliefs all can bring us wonder and joy    or break up and heartache
Use your time now   to reinvent yourself    all the foul language fighting   jealousy and negative thought is holding you back      Obsessions over past problems will make them repeat
Wake up in the morning   and make a gratitude list before you get out of bed    Find things to love every hour and be grateful for them    just as a homing pigeon always returns   so will your lover as he will desire you as you desire him
Presently I am working on self love     I was raised unloved and unwanted   and never knew comfort or security     I realize now ( at an extremely old age to be alone )   that I have been repeating my relationships with different men my whole life     the same situation   the same breakup   uncanny unless you understand LOA    I have been manifesting the same situation over and over   because in my heart I was anticipating the rejection   the abandonment
I know he will be back   and all will be well    live in joy as much as you can

Thank you for kind words Barbidoll! I am certain my lover will be back in no time and we are going to have a healthy happy future together. This forum gives me so much hope so much strength to keep moving forward and fight for my love! I know there is so mucccchhhhhh love we have in our hearts for each other, I just want him to stop dwelling on negative memories of the past and focus on all the beautiful time we shared together! I miss him more than words could ever express. Things got messy this time around with families involved and calling off wedding is a big deal; I really hope (I do believe it) my lover comes back into my life. I am grateful for all you exceptionally wonderful people out here, please keep sending your positive vibes and bless our relationship! He is my soulmate and I will marry him sooner than I could've imagined! I love him with all my heart

barbidoll · 11/30/2017 10:23 am

Shivani_LOAbeliever wrote:
barbidoll wrote:
My Dear
You will manifest him back   What you need to do is not think about any of the behaviors and actions that lead to your break up    What we think about   what we say and our core beliefs all can bring us wonder and joy    or break up and heartache
Use your time now   to reinvent yourself    all the foul language fighting   jealousy and negative thought is holding you back      Obsessions over past problems will make them repeat
Wake up in the morning   and make a gratitude list before you get out of bed    Find things to love every hour and be grateful for them    just as a homing pigeon always returns   so will your lover as he will desire you as you desire him
Presently I am working on self love     I was raised unloved and unwanted   and never knew comfort or security     I realize now ( at an extremely old age to be alone )   that I have been repeating my relationships with different men my whole life     the same situation   the same breakup   uncanny unless you understand LOA    I have been manifesting the same situation over and over   because in my heart I was anticipating the rejection   the abandonment
I know he will be back   and all will be well    live in joy as much as you can
Thank you for kind words Barbidoll! I am certain my lover will be back in no time and we are going to have a healthy happy future together. This forum gives me so much hope so much strength to keep moving forward and fight for my love! I know there is so mucccchhhhhh love we have in our hearts for each other, I just want him to stop dwelling on negative memories of the past and focus on all the beautiful time we shared together! I miss him more than words could ever express. Things got messy this time around with families involved and calling off wedding is a big deal; I really hope (I do believe it) my lover comes back into my life. I am grateful for all you exceptionally wonderful people out here, please keep sending your positive vibes and bless our relationship! He is my soulmate and I will marry him sooner than I could've imagined! I love him with all my heart

Yes you will and it will all be perfect That was the problem with my love and I his father didn't like me and drove a wedge with lies but I know that all will be well with me also The universe has a way of righting wrongs and bringing good back to us its all about releasing anger and welcoming joy

Index
» Veronica's 25 Day Challenge
» I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/27/2017 11:18 am #1

I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/28/2017 4:17 am #2

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/28/2017 9:35 am #3

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/28/2017 11:57 pm #4

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

Shivani_LOAbeliever wrote:

11/29/2017 4:20 am #5

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/29/2017 2:15 pm #6

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/29/2017 4:57 pm #7

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/29/2017 5:05 pm #8

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

11/30/2017 9:24 am #9

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

barbidoll wrote:

11/30/2017 10:23 am #10

Re: I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

Shivani_LOAbeliever wrote:

barbidoll wrote:

Index
» Veronica's 25 Day Challenge
» I Manifested my lover back and lost him again

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