I think I'm a little angry with her too for how she's treated me... maybe it's more hurt than anger, I don't know though. Either way I'm sure there are negative feelings there from my side, but I still love her... Damn I want her back in my life.

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

Thanks for telling us the background which I don't think we knew before.

I'd like to ask you something. I'm not being mean, judgemental or all the other things people call one another on here sometimes. I'm just asking you to consider something. And I'm going to ask another forum member the same thing.

Are you 100% sure that you unconditionally love this woman and you both have something to offer each other, and that any relationship would be reciprocal - ie a good relationship?

Or are you on the train of thought that things went wrong, or you don't like how she behaved to you and so forth, that by putting that right, "getting her back", winning the prize as you see it, validates you and makes you a worthwhile person?

Also, what's so special about her and what does she have to offer?

This is simply an idea but I do know what I'm talking about because I have done that. When I broke it all down I realised I was trying to prove my own worth by getting someone back who had blown hot and cold, been disdainful and talked about other women. He never came back, in fact he ignores me totally. However, though I no longer have any hurt feelings towards him, if I never heard from him again I wouldn't care. It would be nice, if he wants to be a friend and be respectful, but if not it doesn't matter.

Think about it.

I'm in a rush, gotta get ready for work, but I've asked myself that question and the answer is, yes. I truly love her...

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

OK so what are you going to do now?

I don't know. But I want her back in my life as my girlfriend. Really more than anything

80saeaak wrote:

It's very clear that you do love her. You are angry and hurt and I think rightfully so. She really confused the hell out of you! You didn't know where you stood or what she wanted. It's quite unfair and you do have reason to be upset.

I want to put a different spin on this... have you ever thought maybe you're too good for her? I mean, don't you think you deserve someone who is sure about you and not someone who would settle for you or treat you as a backup plan or a rebound?

I do think you romanticize her. There were great moment,s yes, but it sounds like you spent a lot of this in total confusion. Why would you want that? Of course you can change this. You can use Neville Goddard's revision technique to heal these problems. You can Ho'oponopono to forgive yourself and her. You can do anything once you're dispassionate about it and let it go. But, just for fun... why not start making a list of everything you do want from a relationship? All the feelings you had for her, but reciprocated and with certainty? Whether you manifest it from her or someone else doesn't matter. You deserve to be loved and treated well. We all do. Why this one who didn't see your worth when she had you?  I'm way overstepping here, but I think you can do better. I think holding onto her is doing you much more harm than good.

Thank you so much. I mean, I she really did like me a lot... i just also think over the course of the relationship i became needy and her feelings for me faded over time because of it. It was clear she still had feelings for me as more than a friend in some respect...

I don't know if I said but I tried dating other people. I just couldn't do it. I thought I could but I ended up not being able to. I just feel like she's the one. But certainly I need to do something to "feel" better before I even attempt to manifest her back. But those are some really good thoughts thank you. I'll try writing a list

Dan2015 wrote:

I know what you mean by being needy,etc.      someone really can like you a lot/want a relationship

But things like being needy,clingy,desperate, etc can really push a person away and have them changed their minds

I know you have been, but never stop working on yourself.  You can always become better.       I’m sure people who are GREAT at their professions continue to work to improve themselves I’m sure athletes like Tom Brady, Aaron Rodgers,etc I’m sure they never stop working on becoming better

I’m sure bill gates continues to work on his craft.   

Everyone(even successful and “great” people) continue working on themselves(maybe with the exception of Donald Trump and most politicians)


You might want her in your life right now.   But  maybe if it happened right now, you just wouldn’t be ready.   Maybe you would still make the same mistakes

The goal is, when she comes back into your life to KEEP her in your life. 





Great advice

Continue working on yourself and being a “new and improved” you  so when she does come back, she’s shocked about how different(in a good way) you are