You really need to stop and think and examine yourself and develop some self-love and confidence. Try and manifest that before even thinking about having any kind of relationship with anyone.

You need to be so happy and comfortable with your life and with YOU as a person so that when you meet someone you can get to know them. Not immediately think you have a connection and then start obsessing about their communication with you or what they may be doing and then feeling like it's the end of the world when they don't want you.

Meeting people and dating should be fun! It shouldn't cause all this angst within days. You shouldn't have so much emotion and self-worth invested so quickly.

And please, don't contact her anymore. You will get in trouble and it doesn't help you in any way.

Work on YOU. You don't seem like a bad guy at all but you need to figure out what it is that is causing you to have such extreme reactions and emotional responses whenever you meet someone you like.