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I mean this kindly.
You are TOO NEEDY. It is controlling and possessive and obsessive and desperately unattractive and quickly becomes a bit frightening for the other person. That is the energy you are projecting all the time.
You've done it before and it went really badly. Don't do it again.
Please. If you are still in this energy you need to fix you before you even consider a relationship with anyone else.
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And actually I'll go a bit further hoping it'll shock you into stepping back and sorting yourself out.
You were lucky not to be issued with a restraining order with your 'love'. If you had behaved that way with me, I would have issued one. And I have done with someone very similar.
This is a woman you have known for days and you are already think you are entitled to contact her when you want and have her respond within your time frame. 3 hrs isn't long. At all. And you're already saying 'WHO is more important than me, WHO is she talking to?' And WHO is she driving to see?. It is none of your business. She is a woman you've met a few times, you have no say about what she does or with who. It is very worrying that you think this way.
It is frightening that you think it has anything to do with you at all and will quickly become frightening to her.
As happened with your 'love'. And then you still didn't stop. You had no respect for her wishes and became enraged when she did'nt do what you wanted. You are transferring obsession to another person. You will end up in court this time if you don't nip this in the bud and seek Psychiatric help.
And I say this with care for you. A LOA forum is not the best place for someone with obsessive and possessive behaviour. It increases the inappropriate and unwanted (by the other person) thoughts.
And if I get deleted or banned - I'll accept that.
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So.. you're the new "guru" around here? Lol
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I don't think it takes a guru to recognise damaging behaviour. And if you'd read all the posts you wouldn't be flippant about it.
On any other chat forum it would be picked up quickly as out of the ordinary but on a LOA forum it's often inadvertently encouraged 'hey, go YOU! You'll get what you want, don't let reality set you back, she must want you if you want her, ignore her saying she wants you to leave her alone - she just can't handle her strong feelings for you, it's a good sign if you're blocked on everything, yeah she messaged you to say again, leave her alone but that means she's thinking of you! Yeah, seeing her name today is definitely a sign you're on the right path etc etc
LOA forums are manna from heaven for an obsessive/stalker/harasser.
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Either way.. this is an LoA forum, not a typical chat room. And acting like a know it all isn't really helping anyone. If you're such an expert, show us! Not just talk about it and come off as condensending towards other whom aren't as "far along" as you. Give the kid a break.. I have read the post, for 2 years been reading them and in my honest opinion.. he has made some progress.
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I see even on loa forums, people say leave your person alone and work on you.
Maybe I look at the wrong forums, but I never see people say "he/she ignores you that means not to leave them alone"
Veronica,cherished,etc in the past would always tell people go no contact and only respond if the person initiates
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What denim said is interesting and I'm only speaking for myself here, but when you like someone. You really still have to have "your own life" like your own interests, doing things, etc. for me, in the past. I've gotten caught up with thinking about when they're gonna contact me. And once you give someone that much priority it can get stressful
That is when you start caring too much, about who they're with, who they're talking to, what they're doing, why they aren't replying,etc
For example, I love the way supernan on the other forum thinks. His games,etc are all about empowering yourself and not caring too much about what other people around you are doing. I notice he has so much success too.
It really says something, putting 100 percent focus on yourself and not too much on the person you're dating, the person you like, friends,etc. because, yes. You can change other people's actions towards you and how they act(I've done it a few times). But it's best to fully focus on yourself.
With the person I like, she has her days where she's really talkative or very distant, but she's the type that likes her space and I'll never be mad at someone for taking time to themselves. It use to suck, and I would get upset. But I've learned, you have to be happy in your own company, even if nobody is talking to you, including people you love talking to. You have to still be happy and enjoy yourself
I think denim said something like this in another thread, but from experience. People always come back. It can be either when you totally forgot about it/or just don't care. Or it happens, when you do what cherished and others use to do, use their desire/loa as a game, still being happy/calm and just let it happen. While being confident and KNOWING they'll get their way
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Thanks guys.
So like, just an update. I went on whatsapp today to talk with a friend, noticed her profile picture isn't there anymore. Her "last seen" whatever doesn't show up either.Β
So, anyway, I just sent her a short message wishing her a good day.
Two check marks. Not one. Β - So that's a good sign I guess?
But if she didn't block me, she's hidden her privacy settings for whatever reason.Β
Anyway, doesn't sound too good.Β
I'll keep you all updated
Β
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"I think it is better we do not talk and make it more complicated for you and me I am sorry"
Theeeere it is. Ha.
I questioned her on it and she says if it were something I did or something about me she would've told me. She's just been so busy with other things. Sure. Sounds accurate. Then following up with that^.
Appreciate the honesty.
Last edited by YesIWILL (7/09/2017 12:35 pm)
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Easier said than done but try not to react to it. It's way too easy to get caught up with things like that. You're a good looking guy and I'm sure in time you'll be able to find someone who'll make you happy. Your relationship with yourself should always come first though. I understand how lonely being single can be but once you're able to love yourself to the extent that you know you'll be a-ok alone that's when the magic happens.Β
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