Veronica's Law of Attraction Forum » devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

Blossom1 · 5/29/2017 8:32 am

posted on here last week about the difficulties of being in a long distance relationship - wanted to know if loa could bring a more commited relationship, it's been 4 years so I really struggle with it along with the trust and anxieties that it brings anyway, last night we had words - I accused him not loving me, if he really wanted this despite difficulties he'd move it forwards etc he replied I was talking rubbish then ignored my texts and calls - then this morning called and basically dumped me, saying he had problems with his daughter, his sister had cancer, money and work worries and just didn't need me being all needy and insecure and he had no idea when he could commit and as he loved me was letting me go to find happiness elsewhere as he didn't want to hurt me and keep me hanging on waiting - I was devasted, said I understood, id wait etc but he was adamant it was over - I'm in total shock, if anything I though id be the one to finish it if this was going to happen about an hour later he called again to tell me he was not going to be available on phone today, asked if I was ok - I replied obviously not, what do you think ?? then told him I was emptying the jar coins to buy flights to Ireland next year and that I was crying totally upset - he replied 'theres no reason why we still cant go' who knows what will happen, if its meant to be it will be - I told him not to talk crap to soften the blow, and said he wasn't then said he had to go pick his daughter up and said ' I love you ' wtf??? totally confused now, just don't know what to think so basically he finished it saying we need time out, not making any promises but giving me some sort half hope that its not yet over - I told him it would be easier to accept if he didn't love me, but he said he did and wasn't going to lie but things were really difficult and this was how it had to be as it just wasn't working at the moment. so do I have a chance? do I do the 25 day challenge, do I book a 1-1 with veronica ? I love him deeply and although things were difficult with the long distance - I really want to give us the best chance possible, I personally think he thinks I'm going to move on .. which is so not the case, I mean I plan to get on with my life, but no one can replace him and I'm not about to start looking. ironically I did the remote seduction thing this morning - so what the hell happened there? he dumped me Cpl hours later !!!

HappyManifesting · 5/29/2017 1:30 pm

Man! I do not wanna come across mean or rude but you sound really desperate and trust me that is the worst thing you can be. Of all the things you could be, why would you choose to be needy and desperate?!
First of all, throw this desperation out of the window cause there's no place for it here. None whatsoever.
And second of all, instead of looking at the positive side, you are looking at the down side? Why? I mean you are in so much better place than half of us here. Your man at least says he loves you. There are people here whose ex do not even look at their face and have told them to stay away. You are at least getting that from your man. But the ones who have no reason to be hopeful are still happy because this is what LOA is. Being happy no matter what.
I am sorry but you are not in a place to have a healthy relationship right now. You should give time to yourself as well as your man.

Blossom1 · 5/30/2017 3:41 pm

Thank you for your reply happymanifestingIn my defence, I wrote that post Cpl hours after being dumped so may be I came off as desperate - think I was still in shock, totally wasn't expecting ityes I realise I am better off I guess, and I have now gone into no contact to try and give myself time to heal and him the space he clearly needs to deal with things going on in his lifeAs he said - if its meant to be it will be, I hope loa can give me a helping hand

Lolo · 5/30/2017 6:52 pm

Hey, Loa masters all say the same, but I'm just gonna use the Abraham Hick's words

"Your physical reality doesn't mean diddly squad"

Don't mind your story. In fact, I didn't even read it. It's probably the same as all of us: you were negative, some stuff happened, the other person chose to leave, and you felt like you lost a treasure and now you want to go back to what you call home.

It doesn't matter. Focus on what you want and let go of the past.

Forgiving the past is your first step.

And then forgive yourself and heal. You'll be okay, I promise. It does gets better.

Blossom1 · 5/31/2017 12:13 am

Lolo, thank you I'm new to all this - when you say let go of the past do you mean let go of events and circumstances that brought about this situation? its been 2-3 days and that is all I'm focusing on with regret - not for myself out of self pity, but for the hurt and distress that I must have caused him - that my fears drove me to be so selfish worrying such minor things as him not texting back, not visiting so often when he has his sisters cancer etc to deal with he actually accused me of not loving him - I guess he felt this as my actions were not very loving or fair. Prior to meeting him (we've known each other since school) I had been in a 10 year marriage with a compulsive liar cheat etc - its has always been hard to trust and not be fearful of being let down again, guess I projected that and brought this about I'm going to forgive myself and love and support him from affar, and be there for him whatever the outcome - In my heart I know we will be together, just not right now and those detlails I guess don't matter atm. He is not in a good place and I have to respect his wishes - he supported me and waited 7 months for me to be in a good headspace (although I obv wasn't) whilst I was going through my divorce and we were just talking, not in a labelled relationship. I want to love and support him whatever the outcome and take all pressures away, but that's kind of negative in the eyes of loa - shoulding I be living 'as if'?

HappyManifesting · 5/31/2017 12:51 am

You cannot live from the end result till you get rid of the negative emotions and the hurt.

Lolo · 5/31/2017 9:12 am

Can you feel happy and still be thinking of the past? You can't, so you make a choice. What do you want for your life? To be happy, or to grovel around?

The answer is easy. Now, when you're happy, good things will come to you. But the first step to this happiness is forgiving the circumstances and events that brought that situation, as you said.

I recommend you stop posting your story and stop talking about this with other people, it will just make you feel bad and it seems like you're just looking for some negative reassurance, someone telling you "yeah, you're right, you're situation is hopeless", because that is what you believe, is it not?

" In my heart I know we will be together, just not right now and those details I guess don't matter atm"

That's an important statement. Keep it. That's the heart of the LOA. So, if you know you're going to be together either way, why lurk around in the past and in whatever you think you and your person did? Let go of the past.

In the meantime, take your time to grow as a person as well, to heal and to build a strong emotional and mental foundation.

Last edited by Lolo (5/31/2017 9:12 am)

Dan2015 · 5/31/2017 9:53 am

People(including myself at one point) come on here and looking for loa, for all the wrong reasons.

If you're coming here to get your ex back, you're here for the wrong reasons. Get yourself back. Look up Agnes on YouTube, she has some great self love and gratitude meditations, do those, start loving yourself more than ever before and he'll most likely be back. But do it to get yourself back

I've learned to be grateful for what I have, like could you imagine if someone who is homeless and haven't ate in a day came on here and saw us bitching about relationships? Lol

Appreciate and be grateful for what you have, and more will come. At this present time, you're in no place to get him back. Get you back first

Blossom1 · 5/31/2017 10:49 am

thank you again for the supportive posts, I really appreciate it.

Cpl of you have held a mirror up to me and it's taken this break up for me to realise how much like you say I need to heal myself from past hurts and anxieties from the past before I consider trying again with my bf. today I think I'm turning a corner - I texted him this morning a quick 'morning, hope you're ok' mainly because of his sister health situation - just trying to clear the air a little it didn't come from a place of neediness, I have accepted my current situation and tbh was not expecting a reply and that would have been fine as want to start low contact to heal. I switched my phone off when had an apt, and was shocked/happy to find he had called me twice and 4 messages telling me he was trying to call, then one missed call when I got home - I made a cup of tea calmed my nerves, called him - no reply, but again was calm just got on with my day and then he called me back - seemed happy and upbeat, though conversation felt little awkward as it was the first time spoke since break, he asked me lots questions and i stayed positive, made point not saying i missed him then a work colleague called out to him and he finished I've got to go, love you i'll call you in the morning.

I'm grateful that he called, grateful that it looks hopeful after all and grateful in a strange kind of way that it happened as I'm realising where I went wrong so that I can put it right and take the pressure off - desperation, anxiety, insecurity are the 3 main things I have to work on and I have been doing self love meditations etc (agnes)

i realise a few texts and missed calls and a short conversation doesnt mean we are back together, and as its been pointed out I need to find me first and I wont go back to a relationship where I'm hurting myself and him with my anxieties and so this is my main priority - if he doesn't call in the morning, I'm fine with it as in my heart I know he loves me and I'm grateful for the progress made and how things are at the moment and know when we are both healed and the time is right we will get back together. in case anyone wants to know what i did - i listened to lot of veronicas video but in no particular order, lots of agnes self love meditations and 2 x whispering meditations which both manifested, actually 3 as i did the text one when i was in a needy place few weeks ago - he was away and couldnt talk so i asked for a text with XXX that evening i got it, he rarely sends texts with random kisses although its something we used to do when we were first seing each other

Last edited by Blossom1 (5/31/2017 11:08 am)

Blossom1 · 6/04/2017 3:27 pm

update 2he's reached out several times, including a 6.30 am call which I couldn't bring myself to answer even though I knew it was him I was that tired .. he's a builder/construction worker and leaves for London early, he called me again on his break - it was a brief but positive conversation. everytime he reaches out, I write it in my gratitude journal saying thank you, thank you, thank you - conversations are getting slightly longer each time and he still says I love youtoday I missed him but wanted to allow him the space he asked for and rather than call/text I read laines book, tried her technique and did agnes vivarelli's text manifestation - I asked for a random single kiss to let me know he is thinking of me he always sends two, then hand on heart I noticed my phone flashing by the time I finished the meditation and he'd sent me a single kiss .. I was so shocked I called my mum in france to tell her - I think she thought I was going mad lol I'm going to let him lead, but i absolutely have to find myself/heal myself before we re-connect on a permanent basis. would love to hear others experiences with agnes text or whispering technique, I'm beyond gobsmacked !! thank you to all those who have taken the time to reply, wishing you all lots success with your situations

Last edited by Blossom1 (6/04/2017 3:29 pm)

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5/29/2017 8:32 am #1

devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/29/2017 1:30 pm #2

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/30/2017 3:41 pm #3

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/30/2017 6:52 pm #4

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/31/2017 12:13 am #5

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/31/2017 12:51 am #6

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/31/2017 9:12 am #7

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/31/2017 9:53 am #8

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

5/31/2017 10:49 am #9

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

6/04/2017 3:27 pm #10

Re: devastated - just been dumped but he says he still loves me :'(

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