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1/14/2017 10:21 am  #1


slight road block, encouragement MUCH appreciated

My posts don't get much response but I would really appreciate just some encouraging words, I know I'll be fine, but here's what happened.Β 

Lately, for the past few months, I have been seeing my love in a more positive light. I had forgiven him 100% and was feeling good, I've even pushed him back in my mind and shifted my focus to other things, like my business and my education, and just doing little visualizations here and there or saying "I love you too" if he did pop into my head. Almost every night recently though, I have these vivid dreams with him, like vivid dreams of us being together and doing things we've planned to do, or just cuddling, or even the reconciliation. They're very vivid, real, and I always feel that satisfying feeling in the morning.Β 

I unblocked him awhile ago, and Ive been releasing resistance by unblocking the people associated with him too. So I looked at this one girl's profile, who never even had a problem with me, I just was really in a bad place and blocked all of his friends that I knew/met. But she posted this photo that was captioned "a great gift to give your ex this holiday season" and it was a picture of a toaster with a post it note reading "bath bomb." I saw that he liked the photo. Now, there was no comment, and I'm not his only ex. Also a like on a Facebook post doesn't mean you're the person they were thinking about when they liked it. Likes are kind of meaningless I've learned and don't have much deep meaning behind them.Β 

I started feeling a bit upset, but I know I'm going to be fine and my circumstances don't matter, because he's on his way back. I've seen more evidence in support of this than against this. I'm already feeling better, I just needed a second to just kind of acknowledge what I've been feeling. It has officially been 2 years since the first time we met, and I have been doing these great things in my life. I have these little signs that I've been on his mind through the vivid dreams, and just other evidence of old inside jokes popping up on social media or day to day interactions.Β 

I would just love to hear some kind encouraging words to help raise my vibration again. Of course I'm doing that on my own, but it's nice to have some encouragement sometimes. Thank you all in advance!


True forgiveness is accepting the apology you have not yet received.Β 
 

1/14/2017 11:07 am  #2


Re: slight road block, encouragement MUCH appreciated

100% nothing to be upset about, babydoll. I don't hate my ex, but that picture would've made me laugh because I have a dark sense of humor. We live in a world where social media gives us so much ADD that people rarely give too much personal context to stuff like that. The other night, my beloved posted a song that I am certain was meant to be directed at me, KNOWING that I might see it, with lyrics like "I have to walk away", something about lack of trust, blah blah blah.

Way more reactionary for the situation than was warranted. I was upset for a SECOND, thinking it meant that I'm not succeeding, but then I realized that someone who doesn't have strong emotions for you isn't going to have a strong reaction. It was SO uncharacteristic for my love to post something like that with such a potentially passive-aggressive subtext that he's obviously having a strong emotional response to the split a week ago.Β 

THAT is not a man who doesn't still care about me or love me. He's throwing a bit of a bratty tantrum to make himself feel better and that's ok. It means that he's feeling the urge to throw up active resistance to the doubts he has about leaving in the first place. Everything is going just as I desire it to. He's already on his way back. It just made me laugh and go "Aww, honey" and send him some love.


"All of us are God in drag."
- RuPaul
 

1/14/2017 11:13 am  #3


Re: slight road block, encouragement MUCH appreciated

BellaLupa wrote:

100% nothing to be upset about, babydoll. I don't hate my ex, but that picture would've made me laugh because I have a dark sense of humor. We live in a world where social media gives us so much ADD that people rarely give too much personal context to stuff like that. The other night, my beloved posted a song that I am certain was meant to be directed at me, KNOWING that I might see it, with lyrics like "I have to walk away", something about lack of trust, blah blah blah.

Way more reactionary for the situation than was warranted. I was upset for a SECOND, thinking it meant that I'm not succeeding, but then I realized that someone who doesn't have strong emotions for you isn't going to have a strong reaction. It was SO uncharacteristic for my love to post something like that with such a potentially passive-aggressive subtext that he's obviously having a strong emotional response to the split a week ago.Β 

THAT is not a man who doesn't still care about me or love me. He's throwing a bit of a bratty tantrum to make himself feel better and that's ok. It means that he's feeling the urge to throw up active resistance to the doubts he has about leaving in the first place. Everything is going just as I desire it to. He's already on his way back. It just made me laugh and go "Aww, honey" and send him some love.

This is beautiful!!!!! OMG and you're so right!!! This is the perfect reaction! You're right, I should just laugh and send him love! Everything is already going as I desire it to go. I'll just send him a little loving energy, go on about my day.Β 


True forgiveness is accepting the apology you have not yet received.Β 
     Thread Starter
 

1/14/2017 11:49 am  #4


Re: slight road block, encouragement MUCH appreciated

*hugs* We don't have to make this stuff hard on ourselves or them. In fact, that's counterproductive. We WANT a forgiving easy-breezy harmonious relationship with them and we don't get that with anxiety or sweating the small stuff. (Ironically, the behavior that led to my beloved making the decision he made in the first place: my anxiety and insecurity). Do some affirmations today about how lovable you are, how lovable HE thinks you are, and how easy this all is. We're all here for you.


"All of us are God in drag."
- RuPaul
 

1/17/2017 1:07 pm  #5


Re: slight road block, encouragement MUCH appreciated

Maybe you should try writing a letter to him. You don't have to give it to him but just write everything you want to say and then place it in a box or some place. Focus on you and loving yourself... hope that helps.


I am because I think I am
 

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