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I found this article really interesting.
When I was very, very young, I fancied myself in love with a celebrity. Β He was a member of a rather famous British band - I wasn't even that keen on the band or their music - they were OK but I wasn't a fan - it was him. I fancied the absolute pants off him and was obsessed with having a relationship with him. Β I found a way to meet him after a concert - we went to a club and back to his hotel and he invited me to his hotel room. He tried to get me to sleep with him. Β I was 15 at the time but I never told him my age. I didn't want that - I wanted to talk, be his girlfriend, just snog him (oh so naive!) and start a relationship. Β I was unable to articulate this to him. I spent years beating myself up for not being good enough for him and simultaneously losing all respect for him and became very, very confused. I spent months sobbing because I had "lost" him. Β I found a recent clip of him on YouTube and it brought all the thoughts back. Then I spotted this article.Β
I've been visualising an alternative scenario where he invites me to his room as he actually did, but after trying it on I did tell him what I really wanted, and he realised what he was doing was wrong. We did talk, the encounter was positive, and we parted as friends, but with no further contact. Β I then went on with my life in a more positive way than I actually did at 15.Β
I'd be interested what anyone else thinks of this article. Β Isn't it rather like Neville/Pruning Shears of Revision?
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Last edited by PrettyFlamingo (10/10/2016 3:44 pm)
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I love it! Veronica and I were just talking about revision and how it is better for every party involved!!!
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I'm not sure I get the revision thing, since when we do it, we are creating in the 'now' anyway, so why not just create what you want now/for the near future?Β
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I take revision as a way to let go. Especially if something bad happened. You end up stressing about the facts or replaying what you wanted to happen in your head, it helps you to forgive, and to not hold on to those negative vibrations. That is what I get out of it anyway
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Havefaith91 wrote:
I take revision as a way to let go. Especially if something bad happened. You end up stressing about the facts or replaying what you wanted to happen in your head, it helps you to forgive, and to not hold on to those negative vibrations. That is what I get out of it anyway
That's a good description actually. Β I spent years and years hating this man and blaming him for mucking up my life.Β
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I totally understand that! I have had situations like that and after being able to just let go it felt so freeing!!! Like a huge weight was lifted
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I've actually had this type of thing taught to me when I was in therapy when I was struggling in the past with my mental health issues. I had a handful of memories which would always haunt me at the time they were traumatising. I was taught to write down what I remembered and change the ending. Now I can think back on them and it doesn't upset me, I no longer resent the people involved, I even forgave an ex who cheated on me, my life seemed more positive after all of this.Β
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