My boyfriend and I dated for a year and there were few insecurities between us. In that one year we broke up for few days because he lied to me about few things and he wasn't really career oriented and he wasn't caring about anything. So in those few days there was this guy whom he really disliked because that guy liked me and I got close to him. One day I was drunk crying for my boyfriend and that guy came and kissed me, though I didn't kiss him back. Later me and my boyfriend patched up and I never told him about this. I know I am wrong and I should've told. I told my best friend everything and she told me not to tell him. And I love him a lot and I got a fear of losing him so I didn't tell him.
After 6 months things were not fine between me and him anyway and my best friend ditched me and told him everything and she exaggerated. He believed her and not me and left me just on the next day of my birthday. He even cried for me on my birthday when we were having few deep conversations. He asked me for a month as he needed time and he never contacted. Later I don't know why but people started creating more problems between us saying that he cheated on me too but I don't know why my heart never agrees to it. We have a lot of mutuals and they keep creating fights between us. His friend has got him into drugs and it scares me a lot. And his friends basically hate me because I told him they were bad. My ex best friend tries to set him up with a girl and all our mutuals tell me that he did do things with a girl but my heart just doesn't agree. They tell me he has moved on but what we had was so real that I just can't agree to it. He used to call me his wife. I know it's stupid but it was so cute. He liked me for 3 years and I never knew about it. Before dating we got into a fight and I didn't talk to him for 6 months but he never gave up. He used to come to university just to see me. He used to call my ex best friend and ask her if I am coming. Then he would turn up. And after 6 months I called him and we went for a vacation and that's when we started dating. The guy who he was insecure about met us in that vacation only. He was one of our mutuals friend. I always gave my boyfriend my attention I don't know how did this guy matter so much. I know our relationship was real cause we have given our 10000% in this relationship and my higher self and heart says its real.
After this break up once I was drunk and he was with me and I got pissed at him for leaving me, I don't remember anything and I just remember him starring directly in my eyes and I just remember his eyes. Then we once met and he told our friends that he doesn't want to see my face. I had to leave so that he could enjoy. We haven't seen each other since then and I think he avoids coming where I would be.
Can you tell me that does he love me? Does he care? Why would he avoid me?
I have tried everything to get him back but I am losing hope.