1 - mave
- Superhero
Offline - Registered: 7/16/2015
- Posts: 142
Requesting Support
Hi Everyone,
Hope everyone is well!
I miscreated and I am requesting support on how to process and next steps.
Abridged: been attempting for the past year or so to improve my relationship with my guy who currently resides overseas (I accidentally attracting him leaving here and going back overseas :/).
Miscreation is that I spent the last year or whatever being fearful, worried, suspicious etc .of him leading a double life and being with someone else.
The last few times we've seen each other (as recently as about a month and a half ago) things were great in person, as they always are.
I went away for the holiday and just "knew" he would be back here waiting for me when I returned. Well, I was right - except - he hit me up with a text the other night telling me he's here and that he shouldn't see me b/c he's seeing someone where he lives blah blah - details not necessarily - a whole load of stuff about how tortured he feels and that he can't lead a double life. Um, yup. LOA definitely works!!! 
Anyway - I've been doing OK - i really have - I had recently (prior to this) gotten out of my bad space by listening to Abraham, got a new car, got a new apartment, etc. - been feeling really good about moving forwards with my life and been really excited to share that with my guy and be the new, better, improved idealized version of myself for myself and then also, with him.
And so now this.
I'm not angry because i know i created this - I really don't have a lot of intense emotions going on because well, i know that i created this and i know that those emotions just don't serve me.
I also find it ironic that this suddenly happened after i got out of the bad and low vibrations and have really been enjoying my journey. I feel like maybe this situation is the product of the shadow/echo effect.
I also think that in order for me to be the new, improved, idealized version of myself, well then no remnants of my past, including my dynamic (negative) with him can continue to exist - and that in order to move forward, there needs to be a death of the old in order to have a rebirth - so to me, things make sense as to why they're happening.
I know what i need to do now - stop focusing on the past and the past fears and the worry and anxiety and the current reality - however, i could just use a little support and encouragement with this.
The day (being outside of work) seems so long and there seems to be so many moments and time to fill - and quite frankly, i'm a bit afraid of my mind and my thoughts and their wandering ways. I've been doing all I can to NOT think about what's been going on, and trying to fill in all the blanks, and feeling crushed and giving into all that because again - what is the point? Those feelings are not what I want to feel//how i want to be and they just simply don't serve me. But I do have a lot of time on my hands and I want to make sure I stay on the straight and arrow.
So i'm just wondering and requesting that anyone who's willing and able provide a bit of support to keep me on the straight and arrow.
I live alone and spend a lot of time by myself - so weekends such as this are hard - a lot of time on my hands. Am trying to pack boxes for my move to my awesome new apartment! :D
Thank you for reading and for any guidance and support you may have.
- Sanshi
- Top Cat
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- Registered: 12/13/2015
- Posts: 2,617
Re: Requesting Support
First of all, be proud of yourself. Really, your vibration seems to be very good for that what has happened to/through you. You know in which direction to go, so don't worry. Everything will be fine soon. <3
It's interesting that you said that it happened when your finally felt good. I thought of a friend of mine today. She had a similar story (she isn't in LoA, but in spirituality). She wanted this guy, but he wasn't ready and broke off all contact. She was sad and cried much in the beginning, but after a while she decided to love him anyway and got back on her feet. Two weeks later, he came back, but she still talked about this "breakup" sometimes. A few months later, they got together (it was like a miracle) and she was very happy, but after only 2 months, he broke up with her. She couldn't understand it. The only explanation I have for this is that old feelings finally manifested.
What did you do all the weekends you were enjoying your journey? Don't stop doing that. Go outside if the weather is nice. And if it rains, go outside anyway. Listen to happy music, even if it feels unnatural in the first moment. Your vibration has to match the vibration of the music after a while.
Don't worry. Your post sounds like you have all the tools you need. He will be back in no time. <3
"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."
Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
- holistichealing
- Genius
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- Registered: 11/05/2015
- Posts: 994
Re: Requesting Support
Just continue on your journey. Give gratitude for all you have created and live through every moment. Have fun setting up your living space, your safe space. Let your creativity flow as you do so. Send him lots and lots of love, he is with you always. You have not lost him.
Enjoy this incredible journey that will create this wonderful relationship. Continue to laugh and do all that you enjoy. I like to dance and sing. I like to walk in nature. Through this journey you learn we are all connected because of the energy. So his presence is always with you. The loa is a very spiritual thing and I truly am enjoying what I am leanring. So go out there and continue to create beauty. I love you, sweet one.
Rose 🌹
A King only bows down to his Queen.
- mave
- Superhero
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- Registered: 7/16/2015
- Posts: 142
Re: Requesting Support
Thank you both so very much! I so appreciate your words and your support. Thank you
To answer Sanshi's question - what have i done alone on my weekends during my journey - yeah, pretty much the same thing I am doing now - sitting outside - enjoying the view and enjoying nature - enjoying the conversations with friends when they're available.
And just pretty much dreaming about my new life, my new self, and al the potential, and that includes a really awesome connected relationship with my guy.. I've been off balance for awhile now and not the person I myself love and am in love with and so therefore, certainly not the person he's in love with. So i get it. Been making my way back to myself and enjoying it whole heartedly - that's why it's so strange this situation just popped up = i mean, let's be real - it is but it isn't tha strange - i gather it's all the left over stuff finally hitting the projection screen and playing right now.
So what - i just nod and say cheers and keep walking until the movie stops showing b/c there aren't enough viewers at the theater?!??!
I'm excited to be in my new space to create anew and to reignite my creative passions.
Many good things going on.in my life
But how to keep focused positively and not wander to "how long has this been going on" "how serious is it" "has it been consummated"blah blah.....
How to stave off the thoughts and fears about how far have things gone w/ him and this other person? If consummated, I have an issue accepting.
Thank you for your replies and support!!!:
- •
Thread Starter- Sanshi
- Top Cat
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- Posts: 2,617
Re: Requesting Support
I love your theater analogy.
I would say, don't try to stop the thoughts, but think about alternative thoughts. If it's hard to find other thoughts in this moments, make a list of beautiful thoughts when you are in a higher vibration and look at it to inspire you when you need positive thoughts. I think I don't have to tell you that it doesn't matter how serious it is, he is yours. You know that. Take you time. You first have to go through some bad feelings, but if you don't fight against it, you will feel better very soon.
"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."
Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
- holistichealing
- Genius
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- Registered: 11/05/2015
- Posts: 994
Re: Requesting Support
mave wrote:
Thank you both so very much! I so appreciate your words and your support. Thank you
To answer Sanshi's question - what have i done alone on my weekends during my journey - yeah, pretty much the same thing I am doing now - sitting outside - enjoying the view and enjoying nature - enjoying the conversations with friends when they're available.
And just pretty much dreaming about my new life, my new self, and al the potential, and that includes a really awesome connected relationship with my guy.. I've been off balance for awhile now and not the person I myself love and am in love with and so therefore, certainly not the person he's in love with. So i get it. Been making my way back to myself and enjoying it whole heartedly - that's why it's so strange this situation just popped up = i mean, let's be real - it is but it isn't tha strange - i gather it's all the left over stuff finally hitting the projection screen and playing right now.
So what - i just nod and say cheers and keep walking until the movie stops showing b/c there aren't enough viewers at the theater?!??!
I'm excited to be in my new space to create anew and to reignite my creative passions.
Many good things going on.in my life
But how to keep focused positively and not wander to "how long has this been going on" "how serious is it" "has it been consummated"blah blah.....
How to stave off the thoughts and fears about how far have things gone w/ him and this other person? If consummated, I have an issue accepting.
Thank you for your replies and support!!!:
I know there is a part of you that already told you everything is going to be okay. He will be right back. Don't worry about it, just keep up the good work. You are growing into a wonderful being. That is what my Divine Self told me. When you really start to love yourself, you become more in tune with yourself and hear that voice that is full of happiness and peace. It just knows all will be well.
A King only bows down to his Queen.
- mave
- Superhero
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- Registered: 7/16/2015
- Posts: 142
Re: Requesting Support
Thank you.
It's feeling like so much work and mental discipline to stay on the straight and arrow - however, I suppose that not doing so is exactly how and why I have ended up in this current situation. :/
I visually went into the movie theater and I stared imagining a whole bunch of blockbusters playing and the theaters being packed - and no one buying tickets to the other movie and just seeing an empty room.
Then I snuck into the projectors box and went and cut the film - lol
So now all I see and hear is a big empty room with white fuzz on the screen and the sound of the reel endlessly clicking because the film has been cut.
Big old empty room with no viewers and all sorts of awesome movies playing in other rooms to the point where management says yeah - we gotta nix this - we are losing time, space and money.
Bye Felicia!!!! Lol
I am also trying to come to terms with this is the shadow/echo effect of past thoughts and fears and scripts finally getting optioned to play at a theater lol
Does that make sense? Do you agree that's why this has happened?
I also think that I've got so many exciting things going on in rest of life and really wanted to share with him the new car and new apartment etc - been in a great vibe - realized I wasn't excited about sharing with him material things about my life - but rather - this new and improved higher vibrational self.
And - ironically - I actually got to do so via my response and reaction to his news.
So while things didn't pan out as I thought they would re: sharing new vibration (because I kept envisioning it was about the material items) I did actually have the opportunity to and did succeed in preentjng my new improved vibrational self.
Additionally - it occurred to me that how could I be this new improved vibrational being and still have our old story and dynamics playing in the background - impossible
So it makes sense why things would need to come to a head this way because I needed to not be that person anymore and this - he could not continue to show up the same way either.
The only way to exist anew in this improved state I guess is for there to be a death of the past and this is it?
I am filling my head and heart with my preferred truth - that whomever this person or situation is doesn't matter - and that this is not how my story goes or ends with him.
What are your suggestions and tips to stay even keeled about this and to keep the door closed and locked to the demon thoughts that beckon in adverse and non serving directions?
Is this like the flu - bit of a bad case - Fitbit because I didn't use enough hand sanitizer and now I've just go to ride it out?
Thanks in advance for your support
- •
Thread Starter- Sanshi
- Top Cat
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- Posts: 2,617
Re: Requesting Support
The vibrational work gets easier and easier every time you do it. It's like working out. In the beginning, you go through hell, but after a while it gets easier and easier. But it's worth it, that's for sure. It's so much better to think and feel deliberately.
And yes, you are right. Your new you deserves a brand new relationship. Live it now and you can see it soon.
"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."
Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
- mave
- Superhero
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- Registered: 7/16/2015
- Posts: 142
Re: Requesting Support
So, does being the new me mean i have to have a new partner/new lover and surrender him completely?
Or does it mean having a new version of him to match the new version of me?
I do find it interesting that in his communication, he basically said how tortured and tormented he was and how he can't live with himself - almost as if/akin to saying he's rejected the role and the script that I wrote for him all this time and he just cannot fulfill it....
My vibe got a little bit low speaking to a friend of mine who isn't into LOA and who pretty much was like yeah, just let go and let him do his thing and don't even think about getting back together again and go on and date other people etc. etc. etc. and how all of this was inevitable with my guy living in another country etc.
I wanted to point out to my friend that um, no, it wasn't really inevitable by virtue of him living in another country -the only inevitablity here on the table was that i freaking scripted this **** in my head for a year on end....
Anyway - how to get back up and remain positive about all this? How to tell myself it's all OK and all will be OK without feeling delusional or like a wallflower?
- •
Thread Starter- mave
- Superhero
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- Registered: 7/16/2015
- Posts: 142
Re: Requesting Support
And how not to think about this other person and what's happened and what is happening!???
I was struggling with that already but then speaking to my non-LOA friend sort of brought me down a little bit because he was just all matter of fact about it - like these things happen and it was just a matter of time with you not living in the same time and space and what did you expect blah blah
And i'd like to believe in the innocence of the situation that perhaps there's still hope and still a chance that things haven't yet gone very far physically - and that all of this is very new etc. but my friend was sort of very matter of fact 'hes a guy" sort of thing about it....
Not what i need to hear....
How do I circumvent?
- •
Thread StarterVeronica Isles LOA coach veronicaislescoaching.com