Have been doing well, but a few days of fighting and trying to resist sadness, missing him and such have made me more exhausted and down than if I had just gone ahead and done so. someone showed me a picture(I've been avoiding his picture) and it started the spiral.Then there was the spiral from why am I allowing/creating this?

I don't like these "toxic buildups" and spirals at all, especially when they follow a period where I was doing really well; what is the easiest way to let go and avoid the tumult?