It varies from situation but I say don't do it at all. They'll contact you!

The only exception to this would be if YOU were the one who called things off, YOU were the one who said to never talk again. If you're the one who ended things and shut everything down, that's the only reason to reach out, because if not, how are they to know your mind is different.

Now maybe you said some mean things, but unless YOU WERE THE ONE WHO EXPLICITLY SAID NO CONTACT, you shouldn't break it.

If they said no contact, then don't ever contact them again. THEY'LL be the ones to do it.

I would be careful with your last statement. Trying to put thoughts in their head that you really don't have a basis on (since I think I read you haven't spoken to her in weeks except a negative sighting?) is iffy.

It varies by situation. I only did 2 weeks NC because I got pushed by a very clearly universe orchestrated sign to break it. Turned out fine for me, but circumstances vary. Unless you're getting a big fat sign or something, I would let it go at least a month.

I believe in trusting my intuition. If it feels good in your heart to contact her, then go for it.

Just don't make her response your only reason to be happy. Let's say you don't get a response or you get one that's not what you want. Instead of letting it push you into negativity, focus on soothing yourself, focus on feeling good about yourself and where you are, focus on feeling better.

Worrying about a specific time for no contact makes no sense to me, unless you're using that time to feel better. By focusing on feeling better, you find an intuitive sense of knowing of whether to contact or not and when. Some people think no contact is a method in itself to make someone attracted to you again, but if you're getting frustrated by the contact you're not getting, you're just building more frustration. So focus on feeling better and the answers will come.

In college, I really liked a girl and I was learning more about Law of Attraction to help me attract her (specifically detachment and focusing on living a more confident life). Our schedules (and misunderstandings) made a rift. I noticed that if I contacted her to prove myself, to compete for her attention, or because I needed a specific response from her to feel good - nothing worked out (these were all symptoms of need and lack of faith).

As I focused on myself and started feeling good with and without her, I realized that I didn't need her to respond back or even to like me again to enjoy life. I still cared about her, but it felt like gratitude instead of need. She wasn't my reason for living, I could be happy without her. So I contacted her not to get a response back or force things to happen, but just to have fun doing it like the old days, because it felt good. And I got a response back, fun and full of flirting like the old days. (She said she missed me a lot and wanted to contact me but didn't know if I would respond.) Feeling the fun and warmness of talking again was what I wanted, and by feeling the fun and warmness in myself first (by thought and action), it is what I got back. We attract what we are. (Well, just my opinion anyway - could be wrong, but it feels good).

 

I think it's great to wait. It signals to the universe that you trust and have total faith. And that you KNOW you're manifesting like a boss! In my experience, it can go either way as others have stated. If you get this incredible push from the universe and you feel totally elated and simply wish to send them some inspirational message or are recalling a fantastic memory- then it might be ok.. BUT you have to be so beautifully aligned that you ABSOLUTELY don't need a response AT ALL. But most people are doing it from a place of "ok it's been ages I reeeeaaaaally need to know this is working!" And nope.. it won't work because your vibe won't allow it. If you end up sending, you will lose your power/energy balance, and you flip the switch back to needing and awaiting a response. You're back to victim and default creating!

My advice is to trust and expect it any day now! And keep doing what you're doing!

Angellynn wrote:

Cherished wrote:

I think it's great to wait. It signals to the universe that you trust and have total faith. And that you KNOW you're manifesting like a boss! In my experience, it can go either way as others have stated. If you get this incredible push from the universe and you feel totally elated and simply wish to send them some inspirational message or are recalling a fantastic memory- then it might be ok.. BUT you have to be so beautifully aligned that you ABSOLUTELY don't need a response AT ALL. But most people are doing it from a place of "ok it's been ages I reeeeaaaaally need to know this is working!" And nope.. it won't work because your vibe won't allow it. If you end up sending, you will lose your power/energy balance, and you flip the switch back to needing and awaiting a response. You're back to victim and default creating!

My advice is to trust and expect it any day now! And keep doing what you're doing!

I totally agree with this!! However in my situation my lover has messaged me a few times but I just havent felt the need to or even wanted to message back yet or at all. And I want to be aligned beautifully to the point where if I do message back I wouldn't care or not if she responded. I just like to let the universe work its magic!

 
Absolutely, I think you are nailing it. You will know if you are "inspired to act" because you will be joyous and it will feel marvellous in a way you've never experienced. If you don't feel THAT way about responding, don't. And anyway, it's MUCH more satisfying and entertaining to watch the universe deliver everything right into your lap! That's actually half the fun of it! And it teaches you to BELIEVE and EXPECT, which is half the battle won, right?!