dynamochick2210 wrote:

also meant to say before,

Zanett wrote:

So right now, my biggest fear is that he may have a child with her (in which case I wouldn't want him back). I can't get this thought out of my mind, how should I get rid of it?

i had this exact same fear. i have strongly believed he was with three girls already (girls have always liked him, it always made me insecure), the first girl i actually had reason to believe because they were casually dating. so i kept thinking, what if he marries her, what if she gets pregnant and they have to marry (he's that type who would), etc. etc. etc. over and over, had lots of dreams about it and so on. well, they broke up lol. just amicable, no drama, it wasn't a big thing in the first place but from where i was standing it was OH MY GOD HE IS DATING SOMEONE THE APOCALYPSE IS COMING SAVE ME I'M DYING!!!!!!!! ------ what i am trying to say is our minds so often make things seem much much worse than they are, and the drama is really not there, we create it ourselves. 

now i know my love is waiting for me everything is unfolding perfectly just as it should. he always wanted me, he was only dating her because he was on the rebound from his feelings for me, and now he is out there and has eyes only for me. 

but anyway during this period my fear and negative alignment resulted in me being very very sick, and crying so long every day, i really could not manifest anything and though i still pulled through my life, it was affecting everything. i had so many fears about him it made my mind foggy. at the same time i had some good dreams about him and they actually came true.

the only thing that matters is raising your vibes, but again, don't force anything, look after yourself, you're going through something emotional and real and this is natural, but you have the power to lift yourself out of it.

everything is going to be ok

Okkkkk....so now I know why I am feeling so unwell for the last few days....!! Yayy! Got the key of the lock! ;) actually I was(is) fearing that he would go away to his work place! Without even contacting me and saying me that he is here in holidays, what would he do,what wouldn't he do,etc. ... Since then I feel so disturbed from within,sick,pain all over,feverish,losing temper,etc. ... But completely clueless what's the disease actually!

But now I know what's the disease and the medicine too.. ;) .. Soon I will recover!

Thank you so much!

That was such a beautiful and uplifting post dynamochick2210, thank you so much

LoveIsGod wrote:

dynamochick2210 wrote:

also meant to say before,

Zanett wrote:

So right now, my biggest fear is that he may have a child with her (in which case I wouldn't want him back). I can't get this thought out of my mind, how should I get rid of it?

i had this exact same fear. i have strongly believed he was with three girls already (girls have always liked him, it always made me insecure), the first girl i actually had reason to believe because they were casually dating. so i kept thinking, what if he marries her, what if she gets pregnant and they have to marry (he's that type who would), etc. etc. etc. over and over, had lots of dreams about it and so on. well, they broke up lol. just amicable, no drama, it wasn't a big thing in the first place but from where i was standing it was OH MY GOD HE IS DATING SOMEONE THE APOCALYPSE IS COMING SAVE ME I'M DYING!!!!!!!! ------ what i am trying to say is our minds so often make things seem much much worse than they are, and the drama is really not there, we create it ourselves. 

now i know my love is waiting for me everything is unfolding perfectly just as it should. he always wanted me, he was only dating her because he was on the rebound from his feelings for me, and now he is out there and has eyes only for me. 

but anyway during this period my fear and negative alignment resulted in me being very very sick, and crying so long every day, i really could not manifest anything and though i still pulled through my life, it was affecting everything. i had so many fears about him it made my mind foggy. at the same time i had some good dreams about him and they actually came true.

the only thing that matters is raising your vibes, but again, don't force anything, look after yourself, you're going through something emotional and real and this is natural, but you have the power to lift yourself out of it.

everything is going to be ok

Okkkkk....so now I know why I am feeling so unwell for the last few days....!! Yayy! Got the key of the lock! ;) actually I was(is) fearing that he would go away to his work place! Without even contacting me and saying me that he is here in holidays, what would he do,what wouldn't he do,etc. ... Since then I feel so disturbed from within,sick,pain all over,feverish,losing temper,etc. ... But completely clueless what's the disease actually!

But now I know what's the disease and the medicine too.. ;) .. Soon I will recover!

Thank you so much!

oh it's natural, real lovesickness! though it isn't really the love that is causing the pain, it is the fear. and the hurt. 
rejection hurts a lot, but i read somewhere that it is never actually our true selves that are being rejected.

when you fall in love with someone (when your guy fell for you for example), you naturally see their highest self which is also their true self, their infinite nature, which is truely GLORIOUS! i'd say 99% of the time because the person you're falling in love with is radiating positive energy at the time. when we're unhappy we don't usually fall in love and i think we are also less attractive to others. 

when someone rejects you what they are actually rejecting is the negative energy or parts of your ego-self that are in fact an illusion, not the real you. maybe there are insecurities or you just don't like life as much, in any case you are generally in negative alignment when someone pushes you away on any level, friendship, love, whatever.
but these things are the surface, not the core. the real you is ALWAYS glorious and beautiful. you just have to tap that.

before, i knew in theory these things, so i was actually beating myself up for being unhappy. guess what, that didn't make me happier, it made the unhappiness worse! so don't feel bad for feeling bad either, let it happen, it will maybe take some time to get out of your system but it'll help if you can remind yourself that all these horrible feelings and all this pain isn't your true self, think of it as some bug you have, detach from it if you can. 

you can watch your negative thoughts, fears and realise that is all they are - thoughts. they're not the true state of your mind, they're just clouding your mind. it's just like graffiti on a building. 

also, you can stop identifying as much with the pain. instead of saying i am unhappy, say there is unhappiness in me. the sadness isn't you!!!!!!!! your natural state is one of bliss and joy, and the sooner you move away from the bad emotions the better.

anyway, all this will pass, you're far stronger than you know you are and also much more brilliant. you deserve the best of everything and soon i hope you'll see that and get into alignment with the abundance of the universe!
♥ ♥ ♥ 

Thank you all for your kind words
I've noticed that my energy shifts during the day - so these days I wake up feeling nervous and out of sync with my desire. Then during the day I gradually manage to feel a bit better (although that's not as easy as I see the person he's with in the office every day) and in the evening - it differs; I can either feel really good (like last night) and think that I'm OK with everything, even potentially not being back with him, only to wake up the next morning feeling lost, nervous (not in a good way), missing him etc.

I wonder - isn't the initial feeling that I get when I wake up, a message from the Universe giving me a 'summary' of the situation? E.g. if I'm not feeling well, that's because things are not well?

Also, any tips on how to get over what echoes in my mind occasionally - it's all the things he said about how he couldn't make me happy, how I'm too young for him (or rather he's too old for me) etc....

Thank you Cherished. It's just that about two weeks I was really happy doing visualisations etc on how we're going to be back together, it felt great and the manifestation of that didn't feel far away and just then I found out that they'd decided to give them another try.  So now I feel a bit 'discouraged' to throw myself into it again, because I don't want to get hurt e.g. to find out that they're engaged etc. I feel that if I trust the Universe that basically put my happiness in the Universe's hands, it makes me vulnerable...I know it sounds messy, but I'm really glad I could share this with someone