I'm not sure what to title this thread, but I see there's so many low vibes on this forum lately, and a lot of people panicking... I'm not perfect yet, obviously..  I still have my down days, my needy days,etc..   but just comparing my progress month by month...   My love and I brokeup September 7th.. Today is Jan 8th.. yesterday was  4 months since the breakup.

September 7th- to october 7th... I was honestly horrible during this time period, I probably extremely bugged my love, I think during this time she was saying we should only talk once in awhile,  once every few weeks or so.. I was basically so sad,upset,hurt,etc..   I was probably one of the most needy people in the world.. I was HORRIBLE... I  probably spent most of my time, being down or researching ways "how to get an ex back" 

October 7th- November 7th... Honestly.. not much changed during this period.. I was still pretty bad, and things weren't looking good.. at least for the first 20-25 days... then I think on Halloween I emailed Veronica, and that's when things started getting positive... I joined the forum a few days later.     

November 7th to December 7th... Probably the most important time period...   I wasn't great... I had so many ups and downs, if you weren't apart of this forum, ask Cherished and others, how negative my posts sounded, and how negative I was at times in private messages....   my love and I haven't talked much, but then we reconnected I believe on November 9th..    we didn't talk a lot during this time period, and the more I sulk about it, the more upset and  sad I became...        A few positives happened during this time frame.. I met some new people, who ended up becoming very good friends, even flirted with some girls, which helped my confidence more 


December 7th- January 7th/8th....    I still have my downs, but it's not nearly as bad.. I think I just know, that sooner or later my love and I will be back together, I mean during this time, I feel like my love and I have become closer, we don't talk every day or every hour, but when we do talk. I love every moment of the conversation and it's no short convo either, we usually end up writing paragraphs to each other..    she has told me  that she loves having me in her life and I'm an amazing friend, and during the time we've known each other, I've helped her  change as a person in a good way and she knows we are both always there for each other.... I've also helped gave her relationship advice, I don't feel threatened or anything, so I just gave her advice.. I don't think about her relationship though, but she needed someone to talk to and I was there for her....   I can honestly say.. even though I KNOW we will be together again, at this point in time I know I can be happy with or without her, and I think that's what Cherished has been trying to tell us for months, we have to get to the point where we are ok if our loves NEVER come back, and I feel at this point I am. I love her unconditionally and I don't expect anything in return. 

during this time, I've also had crushes on a few girls, nothing really happened but I think my negative mindset stopped me or maybe I just didn't want them as much as I thought I did, honestly  you don't HAVE to, but I don't think there's ANYTHING wrong with casually dating while you're waiting for your love, as long as  you don't hurt anyone... talking to other girls/guys, really does help raise your vibration and get your confidence level up.


I realized, in the two months I've been on this forum... that I can very well get my love back and I 100 percent WILL get her back, but I have to work on myself..  yes I still have my negative moments and stuff, but as a human  that's going to happen.. I just have to work on my SELF confidence.. and be very confidence in myself and love myself, and others will follow.. people really do think of you the way you think of yourself, it's like a reflection of what you see..              I have to work on getting my life going and also getting 100 percent confident in myself.


I think the moral of the story is, work on yourself.. love yourself.. appreciate yourself..