PrettyFlamingo wrote:

Sanshi wrote:

 I would distinguish between the state and the person. His behavior is that of an idiot, sure. But that has nothing to do with him, but what is projected onto him. It doesn't really have relevance that he behaves like an idiot, because there is nothing to change here. It's like complaining about a dirty shirt. Yes, it is dirty, but complaining about the shirt won't change anything regardless of how many people you tell about it and how much you agree with them that it's worth judging that it's dirty. Point is that there is only one power and the moment you give the slightest of that power away, you make yourself a victim and that's what 99,9 % of the people do and why they fail. Every single time we feel bad about something, we give power away.

Which is what I am getting at - why would you give the time of day to someone who is behaving in that way towards you? Move away from them focus on yourself and spend your time with people who deserve it. Is that Law of Attraction? Or is it common sense? Or am I wrong?

I am clearly not "getting it" as I have been told off by two different posters in the last couple of days about my comments. 

I wasn't referring to you, when I said that people find reasons over reasons why something happened. I had said something like this, even if your post hadn't been before mine. If I would take a lot of time to go through every post of this forum and would mark all the passages that are talking about outside causes and are giving meaning to the meaningless, there would be more red than anything on this forum - that includes my own posts.

Well, what you said and what I said seems very similar, but behind it I feel a very different approach. Your approach is: there is a guy in an outside world and this guy behaves like ****, so just don't interact with him, he isn't worth your time. That's common sense and it's better than focusing on that guy and let him treat you like ****, sure.
My approach is: The world is within you and nothing happens independent of you. From that approach it's logical to not spend any time with what you don't want. But it's not a physical approach. You could have a date with the guy, he could treat you like **** (from the perspective of an observer), but all that you feel is him treating you like a princess. You are having the most amazing date of all times, because you don't give any attention to what the world shows you, because you know that it's just what your previous self manifested. From that view of the world, you can leave the guy behind, because you have to desire to spend time with him. Or you could see him in a very different light and he would change. But you accept it as your creation, either way.

We all have our own speed and our own baggage of beliefs that we start with. That makes it easier or harder for us. As long as you are okay with where you are standing, who cares what others say? Do you feel that you aren't getting it? If so, I am sure the right answers will come to you at the right time. Has always been that way for me.

PrettyFlamingo wrote:

You know, I think we all - me included - need to understand what loving yourself, and respecting yourself, mean. I'm not sure I know the difference or indeed if there is any. 

You can start with thinking about the concepts of respect and love.

At the moment people are throwing around the term "self love" as the be all answer to everything but it is a little deeper than using a cosy term.

Self love is a practice one does - not just loving yourself with words and feelings.

What are you trying to achieve - remember it's not a one fix for all.

When you gain insight into what you need to grow it will come to you.