It sounds like you really need to work on self love. You are trying to have someone else do it for you. If that wasn't the case you wouldn't be upset if a guy doesn't do this or that. It seems that you look to a relationship to make up for it which is why you feel worse in it because you are using it for self love and validation. You should start working on this and continue even in a relationship . Are you still with your person? I thought you got them back? You should continue to work on you even if you are. There is nothing wrong with you you just need to love yourself and that fixes a lot . It seems you also have this belief that guys are always up to something. You can try eft tapping or look up how to remove limiting beliefs. I really do think once you truly love yourself you won't be doing these things though.

Last edited by Selfloveiskey (8/29/2017 7:08 am)

You are already in a great place with this so relish in that and work on self love

I just want to say that it is so amazing you are being honest with yourself. We all make mistakes in intimate relationships and we all get blinded by our ego at times. It is incredible that you are able to see where you need to heal and change in order to have a healthy and loving relationship. 

I would suggest talking to someone. Whether that be a therapist, a mentor, LOA Coach (like me or Veronica), a healer etc. It is important that you speak with someone who is a professional and can help you get to the root of these issues (as opposed to a friend who will just give you friendly advice). 

A lot of our shortcomings in relationships stem from childhood wounds. These childhood wounds are always connected to our core beliefs about how we see ourselves. The good news is, you can change these! It will just take a little bit of practice to rewire your nervous system and your thinking, which can easily be done. 

I hope this helps. I would be happy to work with you and you can find my Coaching packages on Veronica’s website

Blessings, 
Julie

happygirl97 wrote:

Hey guys
I sincerely hope someone can help me.
I dont mean to spread negativity because I know I do create this issue.
My problem is that I basically push my boyfriends and relationships away.
I always feel worse in a relationship instead of better.
I over analyse behaviours, get incredibly mad and hurt. I act really impulsively and childish. I cannot control my emotions. I subconsciously search for faults and wrong behaviours in order to justify to MYSELF why I want to end the relationship. Two men adressed this behaviour and only then I noticed they are right. I dig my own hole by only focusing on the bad.
I also have this belief that if a man doesnt do x y z he doesnt love me.
And it drives me NUTS that I totally fail at being at ease in a relationship!
Being single I feel at peace and I do ATTRACT so many guys but after a few months I push them away.
I really want to solve this.
I want to be a source of my own self love so that a man can come towards me.
I dont want to overanalyse, question sb.s love, getting suspicious and completely out of balance.
If I could soustain the state of security in a relationship, ,my relationships would work.
But instead of keeping my state of security and feeling good and confident, I always change to why doesnt he do xyz? Why am I disrespected? Why am I unimportant?

It drives me nuts...
How can I solve this issue?

Hi
Do you know the best part about you?
According to me, it's that you are so aware of your shortcomings. Not just aware, you accept them which is a brave thing to do. You are so far ahead than most of the people who never even realise that there are issues with them.
With all this awareness...with all this self knowledge, please concentrate more on your good points. Your ex called back which means that there is something nice and attractive about you even with all your shortcomings. Let these good points about you empower all the bad points. Move your focus from the bad to the good. Things will start get better...your outlook towards situations and people will get better.
And as Julie suggested, take professional help, work on yourself. Think of it, your situation is not something which cannot  be reversed. Your awareness makes it absolutely possible. There are so many exercises on changing your thought process, on pushing away emotions like anger, distrust. Read about them and try to implement them in your life.
As I said, you are already ahead compared to a lot of other people...embrace your qualities.
Good luck!