Posted by Alexandra23  1/17/2018 4:05 am | #1 |
Hi Iām new here 
my question was so My POI and I are in a dance team together so do have to see him at rehearsal twice a week for 3-4 hrs. What is the best way to be successful in manifesting getting back together and remaining NC but not coming rude or ignoring or anything like that? Iāve been totally fine with not contacting or looking thru social media but I do have to see him in person what the best way to approach it
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Posted by Cynthia 1/17/2018 9:20 am | #2 |
Alexandra23 wrote:
Hi Iām new here
Ā
If you already have contact with the person you don't cut them off just for the sake of having no contact.
The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
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Posted by Alexandra23 1/17/2018 4:43 pm | #3 |
Just donāt really initiate right?
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Posted by Cynthia 1/17/2018 6:06 pm | #4 |
Just donāt really initiate right?
Ā
No contact doesn't apply in every situation. It's really for people who have had a falling out, a bad breakup, or who are otherwise not on good terms so they are not speaking or communicating with each other. If you're seeing this person in the dance group and are on speaking terms, it doesn't apply to you. If you're not speaking already and you're seeing this person, act normally. Don't snub him. You don't have to go out of your way to speak to him, but if you have occasion to pass by him or dance with him, it certainly won't hurt to be friendly and to say hello. That's the normal, natural thing to do.
People seem to be so confused about this no contact, like it applies at all times in every situation, but it doesn't.
I should probably add that you have already said you are leaving him alone outside the dance group, so I would continue to do that and not pursue him outwardly.
Last edited by Cynthia (1/17/2018 6:15 pm)
The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
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Posted by Alexandra23 1/17/2018 10:06 pm | #5 |
Okay so the back story is that we have been dating for about 3 months or so weāve been taking it slow but in my opinion at a good pace. I know heās briefly shared with me that heās had a rough past growing up as well as had made bad decisions. So heās actually been going through legal issues and pretty much told me that he is sorry for the distance between us but thatās hes not the guy I need in my life right now but loves me and definitely sees a future with me but itās been a little weird because heās been a little resistant toward me in person which I assume itās also has to do with the legal issues he has going on and all that he has to prepare for for that but Iāve been visualizing and using lanie Stevens techniques as well as Veronicaās and sometimes Agnes whispering technique I now he feels the love that I send to him although he doesnāt show it in person but I know he just feels really crappy . Iāve also been keeping busy training, working out, being with friends and keeping the vibes up and focusing on me and figuring out how to act is if lol but as far as me texting him I donāt which I was would initiate and in person itās pretty minimal I try to mirror him but pretty it positive
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Posted by Alexandra23 1/17/2018 10:07 pm | #6 |
Also I appreciate you responding and helping me out it help a talking or someone about it thatās about loa thank you š
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Posted by Cynthia 1/17/2018 10:30 pm | #7 |
Okay so the back story is that we have been dating for about 3 months or so weāve been taking it slow but in my opinion at a good pace. I know heās briefly shared with me that heās had a rough past growing up as well as had made bad decisions. So heās actually been going through legal issues and pretty much told me that he is sorry for the distance between us but thatās hes not the guy I need in my life right now but loves me and definitely sees a future with me but itās been a little weird because heās been a little resistant toward me in person which I assume itās also has to do with the legal issues he has going on and all that he has to prepare for for that but Iāve been visualizing and using lanie Stevens techniques as well as Veronicaās and sometimes Agnes whispering technique I now he feels the love that I send to him although he doesnāt show it in person but I know he just feels really crappy . Iāve also been keeping busy training, working out, being with friends and keeping the vibes up and focusing on me and figuring out how to act is if lol but as far as me texting him I donāt which I was would initiate and in person itās pretty minimal I try to mirror him but pretty it positive
Ā
I don't understand the last bit you wrote. You already have contact now, so no contact doesn't apply. If I were you, I would be as good a friend as I could to him and be as supportive as possible without being pushy about it, being there for him when he needs you and letting him take the lead as to when that is, whilst imagining that you already have the most ideal end result, whatever that means to you, whether it's being his girlfriend and all of his legal issues have been sorted and are behind him and no longer causing any problems, or whether you're happily married to each other, or whatever it is that you want. From your description, I have had a similar sort of situation which has yet to be resolved and which I am working on. I also use Lanie's meditations and have found that her recordings help a lot more than doing it without them, and she's got a new youtube channel that she's put some helpful videos on over the last couple of weeks.
The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
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Posted by Oasiscalm 1/18/2018 2:10 am | #8 |
Okay so the back story is that we have been dating for about 3 months or so weāve been taking it slow but in my opinion at a good pace. I know heās briefly shared with me that heās had a rough past growing up as well as had made bad decisions. So heās actually been going through legal issues and pretty much told me that he is sorry for the distance between us but thatās hes not the guy I need in my life right now but loves me and definitely sees a future with me but itās been a little weird because heās been a little resistant toward me in person which I assume itās also has to do with the legal issues he has going on and all that he has to prepare for for that but Iāve been visualizing and using lanie Stevens techniques as well as Veronicaās and sometimes Agnes whispering technique I now he feels the love that I send to him although he doesnāt show it in person but I know he just feels really crappy . Iāve also been keeping busy training, working out, being with friends and keeping the vibes up and focusing on me and figuring out how to act is if lol but as far as me texting him I donāt which I was would initiate and in person itās pretty minimal I try to mirror him but pretty it positive
Why would you go no contact with someone you are seeing.
I'm confused.
Try to mirror someone in a relationship is hard work - be yourself.
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Posted by Alexandra23 1/18/2018 6:26 pm | #9 |
SORRY Cynthia I was trying to reply quickly before practice and I didnāt reread what I wrote. But i basically was saying that I was focusing on myself and trying not to obsess over the outcome and how it was going to be seeing him again initially after not hearing from him prior to not hearing or seeing him and learn to act as if everything is in the works of us getting back together . Itās just been kind of confusing because ever since he had found out that he had to go to court he pretty much ghosted me for weeks until we had to see each other at practice last week and then he explained and apologized over text after we saw another at practice so there was an uncertainty of not knowing where we stood but I mean now there is contact thst msinly pertains to us being in dance and small talk i guess it not something he really wants to talk about in practice (the legal issues) but I definitely feel less resistance from him so Iām hoping the communication isnāt too far I feel better about it .. sorry if Iām confusing tbh this situation has been confusing lol
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Posted by Alexandra23 1/18/2018 6:38 pm | #10 |
Oasis were not together now, he said because of his legal issues and past ācoming backā itās something that he has to deal with but doesnāt want me apart of that even though he knows we could get through it together. If I see him itās due to the obligation that we are in a dance team together and if we have talked at all this past two weeks it has been mainly us being cordial to each other but nothing romantic and there hasnāt been much communication outside of that where as before we were always texting and seeing each other outside of dance but I know he is dealing with these issues which I have no idea what itās like so Iām giving him the space he needs. By mirroring him I mean like just going off by how he approaches me but not like in a childish why Iām just respect his space during these hard times I am definitely myself though sorry if it isnāt confusing like I mentioned earlier to Cynthia this has been really confusing for me It came out of nowhere we were super good and working through things while eating and getting to know each other more. Iām not sure if it is because heās kind of warned me of his past and how he used to be a ābadā person that I subconsciously manifested this situation happening and now weāre not together . Even him breaking it off was a little confusing he said he didnāt want me to go through this with him but definitely sees a future with me but the timing in his life it isnāt right and he wants to give me what I deserve and he canāt right now . Sorry for rambling but yeah I appreciate you even reading this I know to revamp my loa skills! Lol
Last edited by Alexandra23 (1/18/2018 7:08 pm)
