fear, worry, insecruties etc sometimes comes from past hurts not necessarily obsessiveness, im in a long distant relationship and i have a lot of traits in yout description of someone who obsessed - i think with me its the 'fear' of it not working out and falling appart, the fear of being let down has i have in the past. But despite the fear - on both occasions we have split up, it was like the fear was worse than the reality, I was actually relieved in a way, wished him all the best really meant it as i loved him and wanted the best for him even if that meant letting me go. I was obvioulsy upset but I accepted the situation and moved on
On both occasions he came back when i let go and moved on and on both times he said he couldnt believe i wasnt calling, chassing him etc .. as I'd been so fearful of the relationship falling appart.
I also have some traits you describe for desire as despite my insecurities i know in my heart we will be together when the time is right, we've lasted 4 yrs with this distance, ive known him all my life - since we were kids, but the impatience and frustration with the situation i guess leads me back to fear again grrr I agree obsessiveness repells, I cringe thinking how my ex husband chassed me whilst we were going through our divorce, I'd have respected him more if he'd kept his distance and held his own but the more he chassed the more I ran.
Last edited by Blossom1 (7/15/2017 2:07 pm)