Veronica's Law of Attraction Forum / Once back together - questions

**Posted by Little Red Robin** 12/09/2016 1:37 pm

I am having some truly magical days, I affirmed for myself that 'magic and miracles are all around me' and also 'us' when referring to me and my guy. And I saw magic and miracles happen!

So, we've been together for a good 3-4 weeks now, meeting up, kissing/cuddling, being intimate and away to the city a couple of times. No discussion of anything relationship wise, just being and doing, like we're in the present, a new relationship! It's all really great, but i do notice there are some 'specifics' that are showing up to me that I'm not completely happy with. Things I'd forgotten about til now.

I can see that it's these 'specifics' that are points of judgement according to my wants/desires e.g things that displease me.

So, the question this time is, do I just 'ignore' them because they are part of the current reality/version and if I keep my focus away from them and onto the other positive aspects, they will eventually disappear or change?

Or, do I open a dialogue to my fella about these things that are bothering me so that we can look at them together and resolve them?

At this point in my LoA journey, I'm wondering if there is any point to 'discussing' so called problems or issues in relationships or if we just go away and quietly work on them ourselves? It's a much less stressful way, lol Keep the focus on our own alignment and just simply be aware that what might be showing up is not exactly what we want. But then, give our attention/focus to that which we do want to show up ie the version of our relationship with this person?

What I'm getting at, is that some of the things that made me question 'us' the first time round are kinda showing up, although there have been absolutely loads of positives where I feel we've been easily amending past issues through better communication and understanding of each others needs/feelings. so, whilst lots of things between us have been/are being resolved, there are some things about him that I would like to be different??

Thoughts?

**Posted by Sanshi** 12/09/2016 2:00 pm

I think there is a point in discussing things, but not in the way most people do. In my last relationship (that's the bad example now!), it was like "okay, I feel bad because of you, lets talk about it, so that you can change it, so that I can feel better". That's the way it doesn't work, I'm sure you know that. But I think, if you can find a vibrational place where you don't longer feel bad about those things talking about it is a way to resolve problems. It's a manifestation that includes action, so nothing wrong with it. But you have to align with your desire first. The talking itself can't solve the problem, but is only the means through which the manifestation can come. You will notice that the discussion will be completely different than "normal" relationship discussions.

But you don't have to go this way. It's hard to just ignore something that is. If you can do that, it should solve the problem. My way to go about it would be to think how I would like him to behave and focus purely on that.

Your vibration is where you last left it. So it's not so surprising that old patterns show up. You haven't worked on your vibration towards this things and you have expected him to be the way he was before.

**Posted by Little Red Robin** 12/09/2016 2:15 pm

Thank you sanshi, yes, I get what you're saying about discussion being in a way that is problem solving and respectful, I may try it because its based around some real practical things that he could easily change. I think also part of the problem the last time round was that I didn't talk to him about what was bothering me, so I want to keep the lines of communication as open as possible.

Yes, to your second paragraph, thanks for clarifying because that's what I'm thinking, simply to keep the focus on the desired relationship/behaviour.

Hmmm, I will have a look at this, and see if I can change my concept of him. That's what Neville talks about quite a bit, that another's behaviour can change if we can change our concept of them. And I've certainly had a great deal of success with that already given where we are at this point.