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3/26/2019 1:22 pm  #1


Specific Person Success Story I Guess

So I donā€™t want to completely rehash my origin story with this person of interest, but if you look back in my archives youā€™ll see what all happened. Basically back in 2015 he was the reason I became interested in LOA, heā€™s what I came on these forums for help attracting back, etc. I really put a lot of time into trying to attract him back, then I didnā€™t see any results so I just gave up, moved on, was happy.
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Then I matched with him on Tinder this past October and we started ā€œtalkingā€ again. It was kind of crazy because I really had given up on him. I had a great job, was talking to people, had my own interests. I just let go and didnā€™t care anymore. Now I would still social media creep. In fact, a few weeks before we matched I lurked on his Insta and saw him in a few pics with this one guy and it seemed like they were together. Which did hurt, Iā€™ll admit. But then we matched so I figured they broke up.
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I thought about finally posting the success story Iā€™d been dreaming about in this forum. I couldnā€™t believe it. After all this time, we had matched and HE reached out to ME. But he said nothing about what happened and eventually communication died out. Communication was a big problem the last time we were together, so I was waiting for him to make the first move (since I had done all the effort last time). I figured Iā€™d wait for that to happen before posting on here.
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Well a few months passed without us talking. But this time I didnā€™t care. I just went about my life. Eventually I did reach out, things died out again, but then he reached out again. It continued like this in this pattern with me unsure of his true intentions and waiting for him to make a move until this past Sunday.
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He reached out to me (good) but then started talking about how horny he is and he brought up this one time we got a hotel together way back then and then I asked him what he was looking for and he said, ā€œJust fun. Nothing serious.ā€ It just hurt because all this time weā€™ve been talking he hasnā€™t really brought up any memory of us and when he finally does itā€™s from a time we hooked up. No apology or anything. It just sucked.
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I ended up telling him I couldnā€™t do that with him because of our history, which he understood, then I told him ā€œif anything changes let me knowā€. Then I realized that was letting him off too easily and I sent him another message saying, ā€œI think itā€™s really shitty that you knew I liked you all those years ago, knew you were shitty to me and yet still reached out to me just for a booty call. That was a dick move. Hopefully one day you grow up.ā€ And he responded, ā€œFair point. My apologies.ā€ Then I unmatched him.
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Iā€™m obviously hurt and have a lot of thoughts going through my head. It just pisses me off that all those years ago I really liked him, but he was too busy for his work, he put me on the back burner for six months, then when I reached out to him he said he wasnā€™t interested. But then he comes back after all this time just to try and hook up with me. I know I attracted this, but honestly it just really turned me off from him. All that time I pined after him was such a waste. What hurts the most is that he didnā€™t even acknowledge what happened but he acknowledged that effin hotel.
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So Iā€™m just done with him. Iā€™m going through a lot of hurt, but ultimately I just want to turn the page on this. I do believe in LOA, I do believe you can have your specific person and I do believe people can change. This just wasnā€™t an example of that. I also believe some people arenā€™t right for you and this was it. Again, I attracted this. Recently Iā€™ve lost my job and been rejected from every MFA program I applied to and have been feeling ā€œreally not good enoughā€. Last week I looked at his IG and saw more pics of him and that guy and focused more on him having a bf and then this happened. He clearly only wants fun because heā€™s either cheating or in an open relationship with that guy. So I did manifest this. But I donā€™t want it, donā€™t want him anymore. He clearly canā€™t change. And maybe I could change my thoughts/ vibration, but I just donā€™t want to go through the effort anymore.
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And yetā€¦I wish I had said more to him. Wish I told him how he hurt me all those years ago. Part of me even wishes I had hooked up with him just so I couldā€™ve seen him in person and made my peace with him verbally, but I know that ultimately it wouldā€™ve hurt too much to hook up with him in the first place.
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But I guess it doesnā€™t matter because itā€™s the past. My happiness matters more than getting closure with someone who treated me like ****. Iā€™m now focusing on creating a new, different better person. Heā€™s not right for me, and that was a hard lesson to learn, and Iā€™m still learning it in a way, but ultimately I will get through this.
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I guess Iā€™m just coming here to let all you specific person people that, yes, you can do it. You may have a completely different case than mine, I truly believe it. This ā€œencounterā€ happened YEARS later (four years I believe). Honestly, what helped the most was not thinking about him or LOA. I stopped going on these forums, I still meditated and thought positively, but I more just went with the flow of life and didnā€™t obsess as much about getting what I want and then this happened. It probably wouldā€™ve turned out differently if my vibration had been different. But thatā€™s always the hard thing with LOA: knowing when enough is enough, when to keep working at something and when to move on. Itā€™s hard with LOA, which can give you whatever you want, to know when to give up on something. Nothing ever happened with this guy when I was obsessing over LOA, it all happened when I let go. And some people on these forums say to not call people out, but honestly you donā€™t want to be a pushover and sometimes you have to set boundaries with people. Thatā€™s what I did with this guy, because ultimately Iā€™m looking for love, not empty fun, and it sucks, but this road to happiness and using LOA is hard. Thatā€™s something I rarely see said on here.

 

3/27/2019 8:22 am  #2


Re: Specific Person Success Story I Guess

How is this a success story, apart from having contact with this person again after a long time, contact that has led nowhere, where nothing had changed in the interim, and which has left you feeling hurt all over again and saying that you want nothing more to do with the person? (That all could still be changed if you wanted it to be.)

I went back and read your lengthy story from 2015 or 2016, and this outcome was inevitable with all of that letting go, vibration, seeing signs, and using social media posts as a gauge crap.  Signs follow, they don't precede, and visualising and trying to make yourself feel positive is not going far enough. You stated that you had been 'really reading up on Neville'. If you would have followed his advice and had faith in it and persisted long enough, the outcome would have been very different. When Neville wanted to marry his second wife, he lived in the end in his imagination of having the marriage with her just the way he wanted it to be until it happened in the outside world. It's the feeling of having the relationship already and making it as real as possible in the imagination that is the important thing. Imagination plus faith. I did the same thing myself, long before I ever heard of Neville, and was married for a very long time, and now I'm doing exactly the same thing with my current SP. This does not mean obsessing over the person, by the way. It wasn't the sole focus in Neville's or in my life. What you've described doing is more like trying to hit a ball whilst your back is turned on it, and with stating numerous times that you didn't care I don't see how any other outcome could have been expected.

Last edited by Cynthia (3/27/2019 8:29 am)


The first man to raise a fist is the man who has run out of ideas.
 

3/27/2019 2:40 pm  #3


Re: Specific Person Success Story I Guess

Cynthia wrote:

How is this a success story, apart from having contact with this person again after a long time, contact that has led nowhere, where nothing had changed in the interim, and which has left you feeling hurt all over again and saying that you want nothing more to do with the person? (That all could still be changed if you wanted it to be.)

I went back and read your lengthy story from 2015 or 2016, and this outcome was inevitable with all of that letting go, vibration, seeing signs, and using social media posts as a gauge crap. Signs follow, they don't precede, and visualising and trying to make yourself feel positive is not going far enough. You stated that you had been 'really reading up on Neville'. If you would have followed his advice and had faith in it and persisted long enough, the outcome would have been very different. When Neville wanted to marry his second wife, he lived in the end in his imagination of having the marriage with her just the way he wanted it to be until it happened in the outside world. It's the feeling of having the relationship already and making it as real as possible in the imagination that is the important thing. Imagination plus faith. I did the same thing myself, long before I ever heard of Neville, and was married for a very long time, and now I'm doing exactly the same thing with my current SP. This does not mean obsessing over the person, by the way. It wasn't the sole focus in Neville's or in my life. What you've described doing is more like trying to hit a ball whilst your back is turned on it, and with stating numerous times that you didn't care I don't see how any other outcome could have been expected.

I was simply stating my experience and how, over time, I just no longer had interest in my person. It was a success: I manifested contact which is something that I wanted and I could've even met up with him, but it just no longer felt right. All the LOA work before started to feel obsessive to me and I became more negative when I wasn't seeing results. This is just my own personal relationship with LOA and I shared this story so others might get something out of it. You are absolutely right that the outcome could've been different had I given a different vibration. People are so hungry for success stories where people get their SP back and I wanted to share one that was a little different, where I feel at peace with not getting what I wanted all those years ago.
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