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Hi I’m new here my question was so My POI and I are in a dance team together so do have to see him at rehearsal twice a week for 3-4 hrs. What is the best way to be successful in manifesting getting back together and remaining NC but not coming rude or ignoring or anything like that? I’ve been totally fine with not contacting or looking thru social media but I do have to see him in person what the best way to approach it
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Alexandra23 wrote:
Hi I’m new here my question was so My POI and I are in a dance team together so do have to see him at rehearsal twice a week for 3-4 hrs. What is the best way to be successful in manifesting getting back together and remaining NC but not coming rude or ignoring or anything like that? I’ve been totally fine with not contacting or looking thru social media but I do have to see him in person what the best way to approach it
If you already have contact with the person you don't cut them off just for the sake of having no contact.
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Just don’t really initiate right?
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Alexandra23 wrote:
Just don’t really initiate right?
No contact doesn't apply in every situation. It's really for people who have had a falling out, a bad breakup, or who are otherwise not on good terms so they are not speaking or communicating with each other. If you're seeing this person in the dance group and are on speaking terms, it doesn't apply to you. If you're not speaking already and you're seeing this person, act normally. Don't snub him. You don't have to go out of your way to speak to him, but if you have occasion to pass by him or dance with him, it certainly won't hurt to be friendly and to say hello. That's the normal, natural thing to do.
People seem to be so confused about this no contact, like it applies at all times in every situation, but it doesn't.
I should probably add that you have already said you are leaving him alone outside the dance group, so I would continue to do that and not pursue him outwardly.
Last edited by Cynthia (1/17/2018 6:15 pm)
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Okay so the back story is that we have been dating for about 3 months or so we’ve been taking it slow but in my opinion at a good pace. I know he’s briefly shared with me that he’s had a rough past growing up as well as had made bad decisions. So he’s actually been going through legal issues and pretty much told me that he is sorry for the distance between us but that’s hes not the guy I need in my life right now but loves me and definitely sees a future with me but it’s been a little weird because he’s been a little resistant toward me in person which I assume it’s also has to do with the legal issues he has going on and all that he has to prepare for for that but I’ve been visualizing and using lanie Stevens techniques as well as Veronica’s and sometimes Agnes whispering technique I now he feels the love that I send to him although he doesn’t show it in person but I know he just feels really crappy . I’ve also been keeping busy training, working out, being with friends and keeping the vibes up and focusing on me and figuring out how to act is if lol but as far as me texting him I don’t which I was would initiate and in person it’s pretty minimal I try to mirror him but pretty it positive
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Also I appreciate you responding and helping me out it help a talking or someone about it that’s about loa thank you 😊
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Alexandra23 wrote:
Okay so the back story is that we have been dating for about 3 months or so we’ve been taking it slow but in my opinion at a good pace. I know he’s briefly shared with me that he’s had a rough past growing up as well as had made bad decisions. So he’s actually been going through legal issues and pretty much told me that he is sorry for the distance between us but that’s hes not the guy I need in my life right now but loves me and definitely sees a future with me but it’s been a little weird because he’s been a little resistant toward me in person which I assume it’s also has to do with the legal issues he has going on and all that he has to prepare for for that but I’ve been visualizing and using lanie Stevens techniques as well as Veronica’s and sometimes Agnes whispering technique I now he feels the love that I send to him although he doesn’t show it in person but I know he just feels really crappy . I’ve also been keeping busy training, working out, being with friends and keeping the vibes up and focusing on me and figuring out how to act is if lol but as far as me texting him I don’t which I was would initiate and in person it’s pretty minimal I try to mirror him but pretty it positive
I don't understand the last bit you wrote. You already have contact now, so no contact doesn't apply. If I were you, I would be as good a friend as I could to him and be as supportive as possible without being pushy about it, being there for him when he needs you and letting him take the lead as to when that is, whilst imagining that you already have the most ideal end result, whatever that means to you, whether it's being his girlfriend and all of his legal issues have been sorted and are behind him and no longer causing any problems, or whether you're happily married to each other, or whatever it is that you want. From your description, I have had a similar sort of situation which has yet to be resolved and which I am working on. I also use Lanie's meditations and have found that her recordings help a lot more than doing it without them, and she's got a new youtube channel that she's put some helpful videos on over the last couple of weeks.
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Alexandra23 wrote:
Okay so the back story is that we have been dating for about 3 months or so we’ve been taking it slow but in my opinion at a good pace. I know he’s briefly shared with me that he’s had a rough past growing up as well as had made bad decisions. So he’s actually been going through legal issues and pretty much told me that he is sorry for the distance between us but that’s hes not the guy I need in my life right now but loves me and definitely sees a future with me but it’s been a little weird because he’s been a little resistant toward me in person which I assume it’s also has to do with the legal issues he has going on and all that he has to prepare for for that but I’ve been visualizing and using lanie Stevens techniques as well as Veronica’s and sometimes Agnes whispering technique I now he feels the love that I send to him although he doesn’t show it in person but I know he just feels really crappy . I’ve also been keeping busy training, working out, being with friends and keeping the vibes up and focusing on me and figuring out how to act is if lol but as far as me texting him I don’t which I was would initiate and in person it’s pretty minimal I try to mirror him but pretty it positive
Why would you go no contact with someone you are seeing.
I'm confused.
Try to mirror someone in a relationship is hard work - be yourself.
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SORRY Cynthia I was trying to reply quickly before practice and I didn’t reread what I wrote. But i basically was saying that I was focusing on myself and trying not to obsess over the outcome and how it was going to be seeing him again initially after not hearing from him prior to not hearing or seeing him and learn to act as if everything is in the works of us getting back together . It’s just been kind of confusing because ever since he had found out that he had to go to court he pretty much ghosted me for weeks until we had to see each other at practice last week and then he explained and apologized over text after we saw another at practice so there was an uncertainty of not knowing where we stood but I mean now there is contact thst msinly pertains to us being in dance and small talk i guess it not something he really wants to talk about in practice (the legal issues) but I definitely feel less resistance from him so I’m hoping the communication isn’t too far I feel better about it .. sorry if I’m confusing tbh this situation has been confusing lol
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Oasis were not together now, he said because of his legal issues and past “coming back” it’s something that he has to deal with but doesn’t want me apart of that even though he knows we could get through it together. If I see him it’s due to the obligation that we are in a dance team together and if we have talked at all this past two weeks it has been mainly us being cordial to each other but nothing romantic and there hasn’t been much communication outside of that where as before we were always texting and seeing each other outside of dance but I know he is dealing with these issues which I have no idea what it’s like so I’m giving him the space he needs. By mirroring him I mean like just going off by how he approaches me but not like in a childish why I’m just respect his space during these hard times I am definitely myself though sorry if it isn’t confusing like I mentioned earlier to Cynthia this has been really confusing for me It came out of nowhere we were super good and working through things while eating and getting to know each other more. I’m not sure if it is because he’s kind of warned me of his past and how he used to be a “bad” person that I subconsciously manifested this situation happening and now we’re not together . Even him breaking it off was a little confusing he said he didn’t want me to go through this with him but definitely sees a future with me but the timing in his life it isn’t right and he wants to give me what I deserve and he can’t right now . Sorry for rambling but yeah I appreciate you even reading this I know to revamp my loa skills! Lol
Last edited by Alexandra23 (1/18/2018 7:08 pm)