Guys I am really wanting some positive vibes and love sent my way. I am struggling.
Sorry for the incredibly long post but I need to let this all out and share my story and love for this perfect, wonderful man that is my twin flame. My one true love. My Mr Perfect.

I believe somewhere and I am on the thought process of he is mine. We are in a relationship etc etc. And then when I can feel that surge of energy that i've been building up to put into the universe that We Are Happy and Together I get that feeling in me. Deep inside where I am feeling lost. Sabotaging myself as I seem to be missing something. I am trying to convince myself of the truth, when I know the truth. I am not sure if its worry, or that I am scared, or that I am doing the wrong thing?

I have never had this before. I have practised LOA on and off for many years and the only time my life is bad is when I am not paying full attention to it, so I know it works and have seen it and used it many many times. It is how me and my twin flame came together. His entire family are positive and religious which technically it is all the same thing. (I have researched this too. It is the same thing just some people can only believe it has to be a 'person')

Everything was beautiful and in alignment. Then I stopped using loa and let the darkness take over. I felt it coming and I just let it. I needed to do all this to finally change fully deep inside. He is my twin flame and is the only person i have ever been with that makes me want to be a better person for myself. Everyone else i have always wanted to be a better person for them. This guy though. Wonderful, magical, perfect. Everything even to the tiniest of details like how we store bread, he is the only other person that i have ever seen do it the same as me. We literally were two people that met online because I had something inside me tell me to 'like him' as I wasnt going to. We clicked straight away. It really was a dream come true. First time i met him i had to kiss him goodbye. I waited for 2 weeks getting to know him before anything sexual happened as we were just talking. This is the only guy I had ever done any of that with. I usually would of been shy and then sexual straight away. I knew this had to be different. We couldnt stay away from each other,  and when that day finally came for us to be intimate it was beautiful. I wasnt nervous or shy or self conscious. I was and still am appreciated and made to feel like the only one. We had both said we couldnt just be in a relationship for the sake of it. It had to be the person we were going to spend the rest of our lives with. We were Inseparable pretty much every day for 4 months. 
He has the exact same bad habit that once again never seen anyone else do it. I was always a little on edge with guys and could get mad at the littlest things.  This guy however,  I appreciate the small differences and opinions. Fully respect, trust and love this guy. We have a flat together, we live together. We moved close to his family as I only have my mother who I have a strange relationship with.  His name is on the lease. He left his bed at ours even though there is another one and a sofa. Which is because he is moving back in. I am trying my hardest to believe the truth. I wasnt sure whether the 'moving on' would work at all? Or whether to keep going with the living as if. I have a few things i still need to work on and going to put in that once i have done them even a tiny small bit that he will be back as soon as that is sorted. I really have done a 180 with this. I used to smoke. Heavily. I never wanted to stop. So. I stopped smoking. No help. Nothing to replace the cravings with. I also stopped drinking tea. I got the dog we were going to get together. I know when he does come round to see us that he will stay. He will fully move back into our flat with our little happy positive family. He has helped me and I have helped him. We are one. I messed up last night where our connection was so strong that he pretty much was in front of me. Then because of the movie i had just watched the song changed to something slightly less happy and loving. Which because we were so connected at that time i took as him telling me that he just done something mean to stop me telepathically talking to him and sending him love and all that but it was actually just to do with the movie. Nothing connected to my situation at all. I just misinterpreted it as it tried to get in between us (once again sabotaging myself).
I created a situation to speak to him and telepathically spoke to him and heard what he had to say. And when i spoke to him through text because of the situation i created he said pretty much word for word what i had heard him say?
He wanted me to promise him that i would look after myself and do anything and everything I could to be happy... He said we need to love ourselves first. There was no 'we are never getting back together' there was 'i can only be friends but nothing more' there was nothing to discourage only things to back us up and that we both needed this time to love ourselves. I got 2 kisses back from him when id said night. I put 2 first and he put 2 back. I think he was just scared because he knew we would jump back in the relationship fast and mess up again. I want to do this right. I mean. We are spending the rest of our lives together. We are going to build our dream jobs and lifestyle and family. We are going to travel the world and love the world. We are needing to spend time to love ourselves. We lost ourselves in the 'perfect relationship' on the outside and forgot the truth. Because of conditioning and formalities. Instead we should of just been us. But that was a blessing we needed to go through and remember the truth that we love ourselves first and foremost. We love each other maybe the same as ourselves but we had imbalances that we stopped controlling. We got lost in a jungle... Trying to get through it together. Here is how i imagined it... Time apart for ourselves just going through a different route to the same destination.
          🌲🙇👤💷🍦☮️🔧🚘🤴👥💐
          /                   \
💑💏👫🌲🌲🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌲🌲👸🐕🤴
          \                   /
           🌲🙍👤💆💅☮️💃🐶👸👥💞




Anyways sorry for the long post i just need to get this all out. If anyone could even just give me encouragement to keep it up and to truly believe. I think it is just the fact of feeling so alone. I have so much love to give and the LOA is amazing but I need to find new friends thay I can actually share stories with about it. I know my bf will enjoy listening to the stories.

Last edited by Tigerpawwws (1/27/2017 4:39 pm)