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9/10/2019 12:02 pm  #1


Been awhile. I feel like I’m going insane

Hello all,

So long story short. I feel like I’m going insane. I have been in a bad spot 2 months ago and feel a bit better but my belief in the law was shaken. I tried self soothing and just self talk but when I get into a better place I see something that is based on my fears. I have been doing so much to help myself. Last night I saw something that was fear based again. I feel like I’m loosing my mind. I’m doing all sorts of things to help myself and feel better and then they work and negative synchronized stuff seems to show up. It  petrifies me. I don’t know what to do. My belief is very much shaken. I thought I knew things but I don’t feel like I do anymore. Why are there negative synchronization when I’ve been building myself back up and things? It makes it hard for me to even try to manifest what I’m wanting because it seems like no matter what I do to help myself they still show up.

Oh and the fears I’ve had aren’t entirely related to things I’m trying to manifest it’s just fears and so it makes it hard to try to manifest what I want because my belief is so shaken by this.

Last edited by Selfloveiskey (9/10/2019 12:05 pm)

 

9/11/2019 11:33 am  #2


Re: Been awhile. I feel like I’m going insane

Hi. I remember when I was in a tight spot you helped me. I trust you and I know you can get through this. Things do go back to worse if we don't sustain. It has happened to me as well. I gave myself a few days to take out the toxins. Tried a few interesting activities. Initally I almost had to drag myself out of bed but nevertheless, it's my life, I know the truth, it's time to get it right. We've experimented and experienced it so we can never get back to being a victim again. I refuse to accept that. Post the toxin flushing out I started tracing back. I took a notebook and the second I felt bad or noticed a glitch or remembered some of the bad things that had happened in the past, I started writing it down, traced back to the thought that could have led to it and crossed it out. LITERALLY scratched the living **** out of those words. Then I countered it. Asked myself if that thought served my purpose. If not then it goes in the waste bucket. I still do that, I carry the notebook and the second something I don't want comes in my head, I DESTROY it. Now I don't need it frequently. It's helped me get to a very stable state at the least and now when my desires pop up, it's usually something so amazing and real that I can be there. The second thing I'm experimenting is with allowing slots in the day to vent out. I let myself do random things during the day, but atleast 3 hours before bed, I stick to my wish fulfilled state. I have the day to vent out, at the least I can go to bed in my state ( this is with reference to Neville's ladder experiment. I mean if it's not possible to practice it throughout the day, the least we can do for ourselves is stick to it for atleast a few hours, right? ). Third thing I've used to build up my confidence is playing with manifestations. In 4 days I manifested free food, gifts, compliments, friends, and a all expenses paid vacation. I had lost my confidence completely ( even though deep down I knew all along that it's the part of the process, but anyway... Happens, we all fall down sometimes, the point is to dust ourselves up and start again). It's helped me gain stability and confidence at the least. Keep at it. Persistence is the key.

It's like a game, you know. As you keep moving up, the challenges keep getting tougher. Once you pass through it, you'll look back and say, hey, what the hell, did I just do that! Take it as a scope to level up. Whatever you've desired is already in existence, you just need to stick to it somehow, it's tough, I know, but I'm sure your will power is stronger. Show those negative thoughts who is the actual boss of your reality!

 

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