I'm with Colonel as per! I think there are different schools of thought about visualising.

Some see it as visualising what they want to happen as a kind of remote influence; this is what I want us to do together and what I want them to say or do - with the intent that will then manifest in 'reality'.

Other people see it as something just designed to make you feel good and get into a good vibration. I'm with that school of thought.

Last edited by Lifesagas (8/25/2017 10:55 am)

mugginess wrote:

But my belief is that the way we are taught visualization is from a place of using it as witchcraft and it's disrespectful. Your ex can be the worst person in the world but if you do not respect their wishes, what makes you entitled to have them? And when I say things you cannot force anyone to do anything, I got insulted by a few particular forum members, as if I committed a crime.

Yep. This is why I focus on self-love/ self-healing/ self-belief. I stopped trying to give the old "do RS and she'll have feelings for you" because I realized it was wrong and it wasn't helpful because...

1) It keeps the person stuck on the idea of someone else, sometimes to the point of obsession and pain.

2) It misleads the person into thinking that all they have to do is focus on the other person without changing their own energy, so they misunderstand the basics of LoA.

3) It encourages people to be selfish and control others, which is not only wrong (and might have negative ramifications) but it's not what healthy relationships are built on.

4) It always gets on my nerves when people cry about how they love their ex but then only focus on what makes them happy and try to destroy what could make their ex happy. They call it love but it's just selfishness and ego. So now I think not just about what the person wants but what the ex wants too, some people here are just so negative and dishonest and selfish and in denial and if their ex is as awesome as they say they are then I hope they never get back with their ex. I try not to hang around LoA forums as much as I used to because of a lot of negativity and how it's overrun with ex-back stuff, but especially on ex-back forums - we have a culture of applauding people for "creating" the reality they want, even if it has negative consequences for others. Have we lost respect, empathy, compassion, our moral code? I went all Gordon Ramsay on people who PMed me for advice on destroying other people's relationships, cheating on their spouses, or using RS to control other people against their wishes like a slave (basically stalker stuff). **** no I'm not gonna help you do that! When I politely declined to help them because of my own ethics, they got so angry and it was both funny and sad how in denial they were about their actions, telling me this is a positive forum and I'm supposed to be positive by helping them get what they want. Man, **** outta here with that ****!
 

I agree that someone should remove themselves from an abusive situation.  Focusing on changing the abuser isn’t a healthy way to approach life.  Focusing on healing oneself and attracting respect and love in general is what needs to be done. You do always need to respect your ex, as if you say you love them - then you love them unconditionally.  This forum isn’t meant to learn any skills to override anyone’s wishes.  It isn’t meant to try to change someone.  It’s meant to help people learn and grow from within, and then new results just come as a natural result.  And yes, relationships can heal that way but it can’t come from the standpoint of trying to change someone or make them do anything. Self love IS so important! Many of my new videos have been focusing on these sorts of techniques, instead of the usual visualization routine.  I did find that many people were taking the advice to extremes and getting no benefit from doing so.  Thus, I’ve been changing the direction because focusing on *your* happiness and life will by default manifest good things. I appreciate the suggestions with coaching clients too, I will definitely keep that in mind
 

mugginess wrote:

Veronica, I've noticed there are many people coming on this forum escaping from abusive dituayions and yet, they think they can "use" LOA to change them. This worries me a lot as many of these people should be getting help from therapists instead of using LOA to give them some hope. You yourself claim to have escaped an abusive situation and I really don't think it's healthy. Moreover, they get upset when users tell them to focus on themselves as they want to hear that LOA can change an abuser. I don't deny that anything can happen but I really think that having a platform like this forum can allow people on a vicious cycle of hope when they should be focussed on their future.

Moreover, many people's exes, mine included, have moved onto other relationships. At this point I'm at a place where it doesn't bother me much, but I respect his choice. At the end of the day, though I would like one more shot at a relationship with him, I respect his decision to be with someone else and I know that I will still fulfill all my desires. However, many users on this forum don't seem to respect their exes choice. They seem entitled to their exes and it just sounds obsessive. Agnes made a post saying that people have the right to reject remote influence and the whole LOA community went ballistic as if she said something from the devil himself. I recently (just a few days ago) ended a casual relationship with someone only because he strongly believed that he was entitled to sleep with me even though it was against my wishes to do so. LOA shouldn't be about entitled children getting whatever they want, but more about following your instincts and being their best selves to attain their desires.

I think the fundamental theme of this forum should focus on self love and respect for others, even those exes. Yes, their wishes need to be respected. Moreover, I think your videos need to be focussed on things like self love and following your intuition, not visualizing 10 times a day to receive a text.

As for coaching, I would suggest you create something such as exercises to hold your clients accountable. I did some coaching, and while it was helpful to some extent, I think when you assign your clients exercises or assignments and have a regular schedule, they're more likely to get the results they want as opposed to sending an email today and then feeling good and then not feeling good again so they send you another email essentially asking the same thing.

I hope I don't sound to harsh and critical. I really genuinely want people to get the help they need and I hope they appreciate LOA like I have

Veronica, I've been watching your new videos and I want to say thank you! I was worried that some of your videos enabled people to go down a negative spiral but I can really see you genuinely care about your followers. I did want to take a break from the forum but I came to say thank you