Stop trying to talk with him sweetie     that is the first step     I know your desperation makes you do  the stalking    obsessive     looking for excuses to contact him     BUT   the no contact rule is solid   

What I want you to do    is   use the search   and read the posts by Cherished     she has a wonderful way with words and explains  what you need to do well

Watch Veronica's video's     and if you can afford it    buy her ebooks    this will help too

I have know personally people who have gotten their exes back after YEARS   because they finally  detached      its all about the detachment    

I am here to help you  to the best of my ability      you are surrounded by people here who understand   

jensherratt wrote:

If you can't stop thinking about him, then its because he's thinking about you too.
He clearly has resistance and is fearful of showing his true emotions. Deep down, he wants you too.
Desire works both ways.

This is the top statement on this forum that makes me cringe. Desire and obsession are totally different things. Often times resistance to obsession is because they're repellelled. Obsession is not a good thing and shouldn't be encouraged or written off. I have no idea where forum members keep reading this nonsense about obsession being a good thing, but it's not. Quite the opposite. People with healthy inner-relationships (self-love, self-worth, self-esteem) don't have unhealthy thoughts and ideas haunting them about a specific person. Obsession is you telling you to step back and refocus.

Steps to take and why...
No contact. A person can't miss you if you're always available. Moreover, a person doesn't want to be harassed (I'm not implying this is happening here, but people seem to think obsession is a great thing so I'm including that). 
Self-love: This is the most fundamental thing. No one wants the responsibility of loving someone because they refuse to love themselves. Constant reassurance and neediness aren't sexy. The more you love yourself, the more everything works out in your life. Take up hobbies. Make new goals that have nothing to do with your relationship. One of two things will happen: Either you will start vibrating so high that you don't want your POI (I didn't believe this could happen, but it happened to me) or you vibrate so high that they are attracted to you. Either way, YOU have control of the situation instead of the situation controlling you.
Visualizing and RS: These are the last things you should be doing. People spend hours every day doing this and you just don't need to do all that. I've never read a book of techniques that says to devote your life to this. Typically, manifesting a specific person should account for about 20% of your manifestation and visualizing work. The rest of the time you should be working on yourself, your career, you interests, whatever. Your life won't revolve around a relationship and neither should your visualizations.

jensherratt wrote:

80saeaak wrote:

jensherratt wrote:

If you can't stop thinking about him, then its because he's thinking about you too.
He clearly has resistance and is fearful of showing his true emotions. Deep down, he wants you too.
Desire works both ways.

This is the top statement on this forum that makes me cringe. Desire and obsession are totally different things. Often times resistance to obsession is because they're repellelled. Obsession is not a good thing and shouldn't be encouraged or written off. I have no idea where forum members keep reading this nonsense about obsession being a good thing, but it's not. Quite the opposite. People with healthy inner-relationships (self-love, self-worth, self-esteem) don't have unhealthy thoughts and ideas haunting them about a specific person. Obsession is you telling you to step back and refocus.

Steps to take and why...
No contact. A person can't miss you if you're always available. Moreover, a person doesn't want to be harassed (I'm not implying this is happening here, but people seem to think obsession is a great thing so I'm including that). 
Self-love: This is the most fundamental thing. No one wants the responsibility of loving someone because they refuse to love themselves. Constant reassurance and neediness aren't sexy. The more you love yourself, the more everything works out in your life. Take up hobbies. Make new goals that have nothing to do with your relationship. One of two things will happen: Either you will start vibrating so high that you don't want your POI (I didn't believe this could happen, but it happened to me) or you vibrate so high that they are attracted to you. Either way, YOU have control of the situation instead of the situation controlling you.
Visualizing and RS: These are the last things you should be doing. People spend hours every day doing this and you just don't need to do all that. I've never read a book of techniques that says to devote your life to this. Typically, manifesting a specific person should account for about 20% of your manifestation and visualizing work. The rest of the time you should be working on yourself, your career, you interests, whatever. Your life won't revolve around a relationship and neither should your visualizations.

 
I never said obsession was a good thing. I've also said before that desire and obsession are different.
Desire is a two way street and obsession is only on the half of the obsesser

Okay. I misunderstood. I don't think she's simply desiring him. She seems desperate to be with him is why I said that. Sorry about that. 😁

Denimchicken wrote:

I don't think desire always works both ways and like 80s, I feel very uncomfortable when I read that and felt uncomfortable when Veronica said it it one of her videos.

Sometimes it works both ways but it doesn't always. If it did, stalkers wouldn't exist and they do.

I'd not contact him at all and let him come to you. He will if there is desire from both sides.

 
DESIRE works both ways.

OBSESSION doesn't.
Stalkers don't desire. They obsess.

If you don't wanna believe it then that's up to you but I do believe it and I always will.

People have to understand the difference between desire and obsession.

Right now I'm trying to attract a specific person. We have mutual friends and interests, I think he's absolutely gorgeous, and I'd like to manifest him into my life. Here's the thing: We've never met. We've never crossed paths. We are total strangers. I desire him, but he can't possibly desire me because he doesn't know I exist (as far as I know). It can't always be mutual. I've had many men desire and pursue me and I've had absolutely no interest in a relationship, sex, or even a friendship. It simply doesn't work that way. I know people like to think "I want him so he has to want me, too", but you can't just go to that as a default. That's just not how it works.

Beliefs are good and very important, but they can be flawed. There are so many gray areas in LOA. Manifesting specific people/relationships (as opposed to manifesting money, jobs, vacations, etc) seem(s) to be the grayest area. There's no telling how exactly it works.