- YesIWILL
- Expert
Offline - Registered: 10/23/2016
- Posts: 707
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
just found out my sister is pregnant, and I'm not really supposed to be telling anyone. But I wanted to tell her. I thought maybe she'd like to know. (When she found out about my niece she was really excited) and now that I'm having another niece/nephew, I thought, I'd let her know. I didn't put any feeling or expectation into it. Just thought, "if she responds, great. If not, oh well. Doesn't matter.". I sent it to her on whatsapp, half-thinking (I usually use text.
She read it immediately and blocked me. :/
- Dan2015
- Genius
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- Registered: 11/05/2015
- Posts: 841
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
YesIWILL wrote:
just found out my sister is pregnant, and I'm not really supposed to be telling anyone. But I wanted to tell her. I thought maybe she'd like to know. (When she found out about my niece she was really excited) and now that I'm having another niece/nephew, I thought, I'd let her know. I didn't put any feeling or expectation into it. Just thought, "if she responds, great. If not, oh well. Doesn't matter.". I sent it to her on whatsapp, half-thinking (I usually use text.
She read it immediately and blocked me. :/
I would take this as a good thing. Dude, you have to be careful before she ends up putting a restraining order on you Trust me, I know how it feels wanting to tell your person all the things that happens in your life. And share it with someone
But sad to say, at this moment in time. They don't care especially when you're at a low vibe
Being blocked is no big deal. A lot of people have been blocked and unblocked
- Lj
- Superhero
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- Registered: 1/01/2017
- Posts: 220
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
DON'T contact her. Like, AT ALL!
Not birthdays, pregnancy, say hello, say goodbye,whatever you can think of.
DON'T contact her anymore. Give her space and leave her alone for some time.
Maybe she comes around. Maybe she don't. But contacting her definitely won't make her come around.
Maybe it will take a month. Maybe a year. Maybe 5 years. Maybe not at all.
But you need to work on your self and stop focusing on this girl.
Look out for the incoming restraining order, if you're not careful.
- creator1980
- Superhero
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- Registered: 2/03/2017
- Posts: 127
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
just found out my sister is pregnant, and I'm not really supposed to be telling anyone. But I wanted to tell her. I thought maybe she'd like to know. (When she found out about my niece she was really excited) and now that I'm having another niece/nephew, I thought, I'd let her know. I didn't put any feeling or expectation into it. Just thought, "if she responds, great. If not, oh well. Doesn't matter.". I sent it to her on whatsapp, half-thinking (I usually use text.
She read it immediately and blocked me. :/
"When she found out about my niece she was really excited and now that I'm having another niece/nephew, I thought, I'd let her know...".Well there's your expectation....You thought she would be excited again and maybe she did feel excited...
I think you should just be grateful for another family member...one of the best times of my life currently actually occur when i play with my niece and nephew and especially my niece hugging me and saying i love you A....
She never calls me uncle btw and i love it 
- PrettyFlamingo
- Electrified
Offline
- From: God's Own County
- Registered: 4/22/2016
- Posts: 1,867
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
The problem here is that you've been and got some support / medication etc for anxiety and depression yet have then gone on to feed that anxiety by doing the same thing that you posted about earlier in the thread - when you said you had resolved to leave her alone - and possibly undone progress.
I don't know what support other than medication you're getting but I'd hope some of this would include strategies for coping with anxiety as well as taking tablets.
I'm worried that you are going to feed the anxiety issues with contact and the consequences of that contact instead of stepping back.
Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
- PrettyFlamingo
- Electrified
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- From: God's Own County
- Registered: 4/22/2016
- Posts: 1,867
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
Are there anxiety issues in general or is it all focused on this woman, or more broadly relationships? I've seen posts from you from 2014 saying how much you needed to get someone back and didn't want to not have this person in your life, and whilst not as intense as recent posts they were heading that way.
It seems you didn't get that particular individual back. And you continued to live and breathe. Life went on.
So it makes me think it's a pattern. How did you deal with not getting that person back? You survived it didn't you?
Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
- creator1980
- Superhero
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- Registered: 2/03/2017
- Posts: 127
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
Are there anxiety issues in general or is it all focused on this woman, or more broadly relationships? I've seen posts from you from 2014 saying how much you needed to get someone back and didn't want to not have this person in your life, and whilst not as intense as recent posts they were heading that way.
It seems you didn't get that particular individual back. And you continued to live and breathe. Life went on.
So it makes me think it's a pattern. How did you deal with not getting that person back? You survived it didn't you?
So true for lots of people....Yeah we all survive dont we??thank you for the reminder i was once in his place and clearly have made progress and i am grateful
- YesIWILL
- Expert
Offline
- Registered: 10/23/2016
- Posts: 707
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
It was different with that other person.
I want this girl back, and I want to find a way to be hopeful about it. God damnit I really really want her back.
- •
Thread Starter- Avaelle
- Guru
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- Registered: 11/15/2016
- Posts: 1,147
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
You're digging deep and brainstorming ways to get her to respond, any way at all.
Think of it this way, what if every time you reach out it pushes her ten feet further back and breaks down what she thinks of you? Even if she responds it could be a way to use you and to try to get you to go away. Is that what you want? Communication with her no matter the cost.
You should want her to come to you, want her to be attracted to you. You have to change...
The Universe is your playground.
- PrettyFlamingo
- Electrified
Offline
- From: God's Own County
- Registered: 4/22/2016
- Posts: 1,867
Re: Can someone help me with my resistance?
It was different with that other person.
I want this girl back, and I want to find a way to be hopeful about it. God damnit I really really want her back.
Yes, but how different? How were YOU different? Not them. It's about how you reacted, not the other individual.
Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
Veronica Isles LOA coach veronicaislescoaching.com