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1 - collie
- Superhero
Offline - Registered: 6/14/2016
- Posts: 135
I am hurt by my guy and what he said
Hi,
I know that we shouldn't focus on the hurtful things they say and if we are hurt by their words it could be a reflection of how we feel about ourselves and we should love ourselves. However, I am offended and hurt by what he said today and I need to write about it to people who understand LOA as I don't want to feel down and hurt my manifestation.
My guy isn't an ex but a guy that I have been in love with for 4 years (never felt such chemistry and attraction to anybody even my ex-husband). This guy is in a committed relationship so I don't want an affair with him but I do want a relationship with him..I do want us to be together once he leaves his relationship and it is possible.
Today, I went to have lunch at his place of work with him and another mutual friend and his new team member (female) joined us also.
When we left the restaurant he came up to me and casually bumped into me on the side to say hi and he walked slowly with me behind the others. Now, he knows that I haven't been with a guy in a very long time and I am not the girl that sleeps with anyone. When he left his home a few months ago (but then went back)then we did have sexual contact. He knows I have strong feelings for him.
Anyways, he is going to the army next week for 2 weeks. I asked him about that and he told me that where he will be it is very cold and then asked me if he can give my number to the other guys so if they will be cold they can call me to warm them up. I was offended by that although i know he doesn't mean it! I told him he has no respect for me.
Then I asked him how is the new girl. So he asked 'in what respect - if she gives head??I can't tell you coz then you will tell our mutual friend'. That pissed me off even more..he knows my weak points.
He also asked me if I am dating anyone!
I was thinking that with all my scripting and I do that nearly everyday and all my visualizations and sometimes pretending that I am with him when I go shopping or in bed , don't work. And I am thinking maybe he isn't attracted to me as I did put on a lot of weight since I broke my hand and it is noticeable. With that regard I have to practice self-love and lose the weight and be happy with myself.
Also, I was planning on texting him next week to tell him to take care of himself during his reserve duty and good luck but now I am thinking maybe it is a bad idea. I feel down.
Help please!
Thanks
- Avaelle
- Guru
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- Registered: 11/15/2016
- Posts: 1,147
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
Hey, good morning. I'm so sorry to read that you're feeling down. Especially the parts about feeling down about yourself!! :-( I aim to be my own biggest cheerleader no matter what!!
I'm thinking that an underlying belief that you have is that you feel he only wants you in a physical way because you're unworthy of being loved because of your appearance. That is a horrible way to feel and that is likely what manifested things. These were your own thoughts coming out. So, don't be hurt. Just change how you see you!!! Then, everyone will see you that way too!
As far as planning to text him, for now it may be a bad idea. When you text, you should feel good about it without any doubts or nerves. Otherwise it could go bad especially when you think it may. I hope i've helped some
The Universe is your playground.
- collie
- Superhero
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- Registered: 6/14/2016
- Posts: 135
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
Thanks for replying. Very true..i do feel he won't want a real relationship with me other than physical and i don't want that.
As for texting him..i wish him only the best but after what he said to me then i am thinking maybe it isn't respecting myself.
- •
Thread Starter- collie
- Superhero
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- Registered: 6/14/2016
- Posts: 135
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
DC wrote:
Hi Collie;
Have you tried doing a list of positive aspects for him? This has worked well for me in the past.
If you do feel like you're not deserving of a solid long term relationship with this guy, you will get what you believe. In this case, I would personally reflect inward and make a list of your great qualities. If there is a negative thought screaming in your head telling you why not, I would also explore why you feel that way so that you can confront and shift the belief.
What you mean of aspects for him? What i like about him?
And another thing...i keep thinking that he might like the new girl..i need to stop thinking that..last thing i want to manifest.
Last edited by collie (12/28/2016 2:24 pm)
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Thread Starter- Avaelle
- Guru
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- Registered: 11/15/2016
- Posts: 1,147
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
You need to work on a lot of this doubt and concern before proceeding.
The Universe is your playground.
- Sanshi
- Top Cat
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- Registered: 12/13/2015
- Posts: 2,617
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
My personal belief (that I get confirmation for on a daily basis) is that we attract everything we encounter. So the basis for how people treat us is in our thoughts and beliefs. I don't know which thoughts you had, so I can't tell you what made this happen. But I know that this is just a reflection and by focusing on it, you get more of it. So, stop that. Go off the subject for now, if necessary.
Scripting and stuff is nice, but much more important is what you think between your scripting sessions. Are you aware of it? And is it in line with what you scripted?
"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."
Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
- collie
- Superhero
Offline
- Registered: 6/14/2016
- Posts: 135
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
My personal belief (that I get confirmation for on a daily basis) is that we attract everything we encounter. So the basis for how people treat us is in our thoughts and beliefs. I don't know which thoughts you had, so I can't tell you what made this happen. But I know that this is just a reflection and by focusing on it, you get more of it. So, stop that. Go off the subject for now, if necessary.
Scripting and stuff is nice, but much more important is what you think between your scripting sessions. Are you aware of it? And is it in line with what you scripted?
Thanks for replying. I do have thoughts that i am not good enough for him and that he will prefer someone like the new girl on his team or this other girl..that he might think they are more relationship material than me.
I do think he only wants me on the physical level so yep i did attract that. Should I stop scripting and doing the techniques to manifest him for now? Should i text him or not before he goes to the army? What do you suggest I do? I want him to respect me and want more than just physical .
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Thread Starter- Sanshi
- Top Cat
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- Registered: 12/13/2015
- Posts: 2,617
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
My personal belief (that I get confirmation for on a daily basis) is that we attract everything we encounter. So the basis for how people treat us is in our thoughts and beliefs. I don't know which thoughts you had, so I can't tell you what made this happen. But I know that this is just a reflection and by focusing on it, you get more of it. So, stop that. Go off the subject for now, if necessary.
Scripting and stuff is nice, but much more important is what you think between your scripting sessions. Are you aware of it? And is it in line with what you scripted?Thanks for replying. I do have thoughts that i am not good enough for him and that he will prefer someone like the new girl on his team or this other girl..that he might think they are more relationship material than me.
I do think he only wants me on the physical level so yep i did attract that. Should I stop scripting and doing the techniques to manifest him for now? Should i text him or not before he goes to the army? What do you suggest I do? I want him to respect me and want more than just physical .
It's not about what you do, but where your focus is. You can do all the techniques, but don't get sloppy in your thinking the rest of the day. Live the relationship you want with him now without wobbling. Assume him to be the one you want him to be.
"Self-abandonment. That is the secret. We have to abandon ourselves to the state, in our love for the state, and in so doing live the life of the state and no more our present state. And to make the state alive, one must become it."
Neville Goddard ~ The Law and the Promise
- collie
- Superhero
Offline
- Registered: 6/14/2016
- Posts: 135
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
Hi Collie;
Have you tried doing a list of positive aspects for him? This has worked well for me in the past.
If you do feel like you're not deserving of a solid long term relationship with this guy, you will get what you believe. In this case, I would personally reflect inward and make a list of your great qualities. If there is a negative thought screaming in your head telling you why not, I would also explore why you feel that way so that you can confront and shift the belief.
What you mean of aspects for him? What i like about him?
And another thing...i keep thinking that he might like the new girl..i need to stop thinking that..last thing i want to manifest.This is a method Abe talks about. Every day for 30 days, write down what you really like about him. In your case, if you want him to be more thoughtful of your feelings, you can write x is so thoughtful. Then concentrate and remember one instance when he demonstrated this aspect, even if it was only once. It's ok to milk the one time behaviour. It doesn't have to be a lengthy list. But, after you start writing it down, you will see a shift in him where he only offers those aspects of himself to you.
I did this for my ex-husband when he was being an ass. His behaviour changed drastically in about two weeks time. There are a number of Abraham YouTube videos on this. It works.
I will start writing today. I can write the same aspects everyday correct? I want him to be more thoughtful and to show that he is still attracted to me. I want him to also be more in touch. Can i write these things?
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Thread Starter- collie
- Superhero
Offline
- Registered: 6/14/2016
- Posts: 135
Re: I am hurt by my guy and what he said
My personal belief (that I get confirmation for on a daily basis) is that we attract everything we encounter. So the basis for how people treat us is in our thoughts and beliefs. I don't know which thoughts you had, so I can't tell you what made this happen. But I know that this is just a reflection and by focusing on it, you get more of it. So, stop that. Go off the subject for now, if necessary.
Scripting and stuff is nice, but much more important is what you think between your scripting sessions. Are you aware of it? And is it in line with what you scripted?Thanks for replying. I do have thoughts that i am not good enough for him and that he will prefer someone like the new girl on his team or this other girl..that he might think they are more relationship material than me.
I do think he only wants me on the physical level so yep i did attract that. Should I stop scripting and doing the techniques to manifest him for now? Should i text him or not before he goes to the army? What do you suggest I do? I want him to respect me and want more than just physical .It's not about what you do, but where your focus is. You can do all the techniques, but don't get sloppy in your thinking the rest of the day. Live the relationship you want with him now without wobbling. Assume him to be the one you want him to be.
Unfortunately, I do wobble and lets things i hear or experience interfere and ruin my mood. Another thing that i read is that we mustn't let hurt get in the way and we must forgive quickly. Is that true? If i don't send him a message before he goes on duty it will only be coz i am hurt..should i try overcome it and send him a message to take care before he goes and then go NC until he contacts me and he will?
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Thread StarterVeronica Isles LOA coach veronicaislescoaching.com