What do you expect and belief his intentions to be? You decide how your reality plays out. It doesn't matter what your friends think. Only what you think is important.

Howardgirl12 wrote:

Thank you I'm trying to stay positive and manifest what I want. However I have let him in before to be hurt in the end.

Nobody can hurt you. It's always your thoughts that hurt you. The more it hurts the more it's a clear sign that your Inner Being sees the situation completely differently than you think about it. I know it's hard to shift your thoughts around someone you love and who can easily influence your feelings. But expecting him to hurt you is just a safety mechanism of your ego to protect you. The thought itself hurts, but you think it would hurt even more, if you don't expect him to hurt you. But by expecting it, you bring it into being. If you could stay true to what you want, even the moment he says something that would normally hurt you, he will behave exactly as you want it. There is just this small time gap you have to bridge.

Last edited by Sanshi (11/13/2016 6:23 pm)

Write down all the things you want as if you already have them. 

- His intentions are only good
- He wants to be with me
- He loves me 
- etc etc

My friends are exactly the same with me, I just take what they say with a pinch of salt because they mean well, they only want what is best for you, after all, when you're upset it upsets them too. 
As Sanshi says if you expect to be hurt, you get that. You create your own reality. I've started writing down the qualities my guy has which I love as Justine spoke about. I also found scripting helps me feel better about my reality and I write the situations him and I are going to be in. 

Sanshi wrote:

Howardgirl12 wrote:

Thank you I'm trying to stay positive and manifest what I want. However I have let him in before to be hurt in the end.

Nobody can hurt you. It's always your thoughts that hurt you. The more it hurts the more it's a clear sign that your Inner Being sees the situation completely differently than you think about it. I know it's hard to shift your thoughts around someone you love and who can easily influence your feelings. But expecting him to hurt you is just a safety mechanism of your ego to protect you. The thought itself hurts, but you think it would hurt even more, if you don't expect him to hurt you. But by expecting it, you bring it into being. If you could stay true to what you want, even the moment he says something that would normally hurt you, he will behave exactly as you want it. There is just this small time gap you have to bridge.

You know, this has been something I have been talking about with friends over the weekend.  A close friend of mine has been incredibly hurtful and dismissive over something.  I lost my cat on Tuesday and I really needed some comfort and support but was accused of "turning on the waterworks".  Now I did feel hurt at being dismissed and so on, but in reality I realise that it is the "friend" who looks stupid and mean over this, not me - they are behaving in an unkind manner.  I can't dress that up, and "pretend" in another "reality" that they weren't mean, because they were.  But that is their problem, not mine.

Similarly with guys who make sexist comments.  I recently went to a Macmillan coffee morning and that evening went out for drinks with some friends where there were cakes etc for sale.  One bloke who I had never seen before said to me something like "get some cake down your neck" and I said that I had eaten loads of muffins already.  "I like your muffins" he said, looking at my t**s!!  And this was with his friend and their two female partners.  I didn't feel insulted or hurt, but sorry for him for being such a stupid, sexist neanderthal idiot!