1 of 1- PrettyFlamingo
- Electrified
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- From: God's Own County
- Registered: 4/22/2016
- Posts: 1,867
Is it necessary to end a relationship first?
I mean before actively looking for something else?
This was a topic of conversation between me and my girlfriends on our night out last night. My friend is with someone, and has been for a long time, but there is nothing romantic/attraction/fancying between them anymore. It's evolved into a friendship really, but he still fancies her, he says, and they go on holiday together, do things together, see each other once a week which she says is good, but for her that is as far as it goes. But she says she doesn't see a reason to end it at the moment because you wouldn't walk out of a job just because it doesn't meet all your requirements until you had a new one. And she says they aren't together enough for her to make it feel like a proper relationship, which I think is her get-out clause.
She is adamant that working on what she has isn't an option because the feelings have gone (of that kind), and she likes him and would miss him if they split but she feels the full package lies with someone else - whoever that may be.
She would like to meet and form a relationship with someone else - she's scripted the guy in her workbook, but she asks if she needs to end things with the current chap before she will actually meet anyone else, because she doesn't seem to be meeting any other guys. So I guess the question is, is it unethical to be attracting a Guy B when the old one is still around, of sorts? And would the universe block it and not allow it until she has finished with Guy A?
Be a flamingo in a flock of pigeons.
- Little Red Robin
- Expert
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- From: UK
- Registered: 5/05/2016
- Posts: 500
Re: Is it necessary to end a relationship first?
Hmm, interesting questions! I'll throw my tuppence in. 
Well, it there's no love, I would let it go because I think there is a natural time period, a sort of cleansing of sorts, before moving into a new relationship. I think it's unfair to the guy as well if she knows he's not the one for her. But also, she could try some of the LoA methods for improving the existing relationship, if that was an option, things might turn around, especially if the already know and trust one another, but if she doesn't feel it with him, then maybe best to move on.
I don't think the universe would block bringing to her another man. But, if she's single/unattached, it frees up energy and puts out a clearer signal maybe that she's available? so, she could be more of a magnet for what she wants ie other possible suitors and may happen quicker? But often people meet when they're already in a relationship and if the energy/connection/attraction is stronger,ie more lined up with the new person, then universal forces are sort of already geared up with momentum for that one to develop regardless. Just my perspective on it really?
Love is all
- Craigd88
- Superhero
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- Registered: 2/16/2016
- Posts: 170
Re: Is it necessary to end a relationship first?
It's called overlapping. It's a form of cheating and is severely frowned upon. Don't do it. End the relationship before seeking someone else. My ex did this to me and it sucked so bad. It really hurt. Treat people the way you want to be treated.
Remember, karma.
Last edited by Craigd88 (7/24/2016 7:59 am)
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- Oasiscalm
- Warrior
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- Registered: 1/14/2016
- Posts: 270
Re: Is it necessary to end a relationship first?
You do what feels right to you.
Who knows where he search made lead her. She may well go in one big circle and end up staying with him.
I tend not to judge people and their actions in relationships because you will never know the true story of what is going on.
I guess the question is it unethical to be eyeing up a pizza whilst eating a hamburger. Loool.
- Jim Chien Beige
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- Registered: 6/07/2016
- Posts: 194
Re: Is it necessary to end a relationship first?
This response won't be LOA oriented (or maybe it is). When I was married and having problems with my ex, we went to a seminar called: Earn your right to divorce. The main premise that the psychologist stated was: don't change partners, change you! He explained that the people who jump from one relationship to another end up having the same issues with different people. He said: when you change, everything in your life changes, including your spouse.
Sounds like LOA, isn't it?
Last edited by Jim Chien Beige (7/24/2016 10:17 am)
- Jim Chien Beige
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- Registered: 6/07/2016
- Posts: 194
Re: Is it necessary to end a relationship first?
wolf wrote:
This response won't be LOA oriented (or maybe it is). When I was married and having problems with my ex, we went to a seminar called: Earn your right to divorce. The main premise that the psychologist stated was: don't change partners, change you! He explained that the people who jump from one relationship to another end up having the same issues with different people. He said: when you change, everything in your life changes, including your spouse.
Sounds like LOA, isn't it?Which is basically the point of Abraham, too
That psychologist is very clever. Probably he knows about LOA. 
Veronica Isles LOA coach veronicaislescoaching.com