Time for another update, because I learned some very important things lately.

Since my last post, I tried to feel good. I tried hard to feel good and the harder I tried, the harder it got. After one day of complete non-resistance which felt soooooooo amazing, I fell back in resistance and I couldn't find my way out. I started to become frustrated about being happy and needed to feel better about feeling better. And then, I found the missing piece why applying LoA seemed so hard all along.

I realized that I didn't feel worthy, I didn't feel deserving for the things I wanted. That was the whole reason that I still had a hard time believing that some things would happen for me. When I think about all the manifestations I had, big and small, I always felt deserving and it wasn't hard to believe for me. But all the things that don't work out so well, I still feel in some way insecure about myself. I decided to focus on myself, to work on my feeling of worthiness and my self-love. And it makes such a huge difference. I feel so much better, I feel centered in myself and for the first time in months and months, I don't try to manifest something. It takes so much pressure off me. I feel free of resistance and I know now that this is the very basis of LoA. You can't accept that you are the creator of your experience, when you feel unworthy. God never feels unworthy and to have full control over your world, you have to feel like god first.

I feel like updating this thread, because so much has changed for me.

Lately, I started trusting in life. I started to believe that there was something that was taking care of me, like a child trust their parents that they can do anything and that they won't ever let anything or anybody hurt their child. Since then, my life has changed - I can't put it any other way. Suddenly, everything is flowing. Things are showing up. I solved all my major issues. There aren't any big feeling problems left. I manifested a vacation on Mallorca and I didn't spend one cent for the whole trip. Everything flows, if we let it. My faith in LoA and life is bigger than ever. I start to reach for bigger things, but they don't seem so big anymore, because I don't have so many limiting thoughts anymore. Life takes care of me. Why should there be any limitations?

Haven't updated here in a while, but everything is in the process of changing, so I decided to do it now.

I have been studying Neville for months now. I sticked to him mostly. I discarded all the others I used to study, because I felt that all the different approaches to the same thing just confused me. So since August now, I dedicated much of my time, spent thought and energy on Neville. Since then for the first time ever, I feel that I have a complete  understanding without any questions left. The only thing I had still trouble with was the conscious application. But now, I figured it out. I found the master key to this. It is full acceptance of the fact that I am God in every single second of my life. I am the only cause for everything on this world. Realizing this and living by it is the way to  nail this. It's not your food that makes you fat - it's your knowing that it does. It's not the pills that make you feel better - it's your belief that they do. It's not because of the character of person xy that they behave that way - it's becaus you expect it. There always seem to be physical causes and when you choose to buy into them, you are giving your power away. You can't assume being God and giving your power away at the same time. Either you are God and you are the cause or you aren't God and something other is the cause.
I realized how much power I have given away all the time by giving meaning to stuff and seeing a cause outside of myself. When I am always looking for a cause outside of myself, of course I have a hard time believing in something I can't see, because all my beliefs are based on seeming causes on the outside. But the moment I accept fully that I am God, I don't look at the outside anymore. I know that what creates is my assumption. So I assume something and I look at that, knowing that it is the only cause and I can savely believe in that assumption as I used to believe in the words of people and in the evidence of my senses before.
How can we create as skillfully as God while we can't fully accept that we are God?