I'm not looking for pity.. I just needed to share my feelings that's all

No no, don't feel like an idiot! You're simply learning, thats all. We've all been there! 

I think I can speak collectively and say we all want to see you raise your vibration. As a newcomer, it won't be easy. Even I still struggle, and I've read books and have visited many, many websites. This site has honestly been the only one where I will get answers exactly how I'd want them.. straight to the chase and no sugar coating. We are all here to help one another achieve all of our wildest desires. 

It's going to take some time, and thats okay. No need to put yourself down! 

I've felt a lot of times like this. You are not the only one. You need to pay attention to your feelings and acknoledge what's going on inside you. Always accept yourself in every situation. It is probably a belief about yourself or others that makes you feel this way. Can you see that it is just a thought that you keep thinking and confirming in your mind? It is a neutral thought that you believed through repetition. You made it important. But it's ok, be ok with that. Let it be. Now, what kind of thought would you like to plant in your mind? What would you like to believe? Find that thought and focus on that. Repete again and again. When the old belief comes, replace it with the opposite, new thought and if you can't, think of something neutral, like a blue pen. Take your focus off of the old thought. Stop thinking of it and you will make it weaker. Repete the new one again and again. Or something else. And always accept yourself and be nice to you. Remember that this is not you. You have identified yourself to this thought. If you say ''nobody likes me'', this is not you. It is just a thought. You have the thought but you are not the thought.

iinikkii wrote:

more hope in my heart.. That maybe JUST MAYBE I can too..

You had a typo so I fixed it for you.. 
 

iinikkii,

You CAN and you WILL. But everyone's journey is different and will have different timing. A lot of us have shared personal successes with you today. It works, but analyzing it to death doesn't give you faith. Trust me when I say that overthinking it hinders your progress. It did for me. But also trust me when I say it totally works Do your visualization and feel like it's so real that you can feel yourself in his arms, etc. Notice how it feels. Once you've done that, it's a done deal. You experience it in the mind, you'll experience it in the body. I can list other reasons why this works below if you care to read, but that's all you really need to do. Just be the person that has this guy, close your eyes and experience him in your mind, just for now. Do it because it feels good. Do it until you aren't stressed about the situation anymore. That's when you'll see movement in the right direction...when you aren't stressing out about it

For the more technical stuff, basically, when you implant an ideal in your subconscious mind, it does some "thinking" for you in the background. Say, you have a particular goal and you just KNOW that you'll make this goal happen. Your subconscious accepts this goal and scans your environment for opportunities. Ironically, the subconscious also accepts these suggestions easiest when you aren't overly stressed or worried about them. That's why it's best if there is some level of disconnect. Not apathy or loss of desire, but "faith" that it will happen when it happens. Basically, the subconscious is your higher self, building the bridges from where you are to where you want to be. You'll get "ideas" and "hints." That's you higher self/subconscious nudging you. It will lead you in the right direction, putting ideas, opportunities, people, things, events in your path to get you to your goal. It does it so well, it appears like a coincidence. But it's not. It's you...helping you. It's a beautiful thing. Really, the difference between success and failure is what YOU believe about YOU.  Personally, I think you've got it nailed and have a 100% chance of success. But, you need to make the journey

-Dan