i think this is your intuition fizzling with goodness, your doing great, it's called 'inspired action'  

i got a strong urge to add him on facebook once and didn't lol because i was too scared, but it was a very strong urge and i think if i had, things would have developed well. i really regret not following my urge...

I followed it and went. We showed up at the same time. I knew he would have a girl with him; he did, but a friend who he immediately explained had carpooled from work and they were having a thing at her house and he'd be back later. I stayed to hang out with the dog.

He came back late but then stayed up watching a movie with me. At some point spent an hour working up to cuddling/holding my hand/kissing me, which led to other stuff (yeah I know).

It's obvious he's still been drinking a lot and not eating hardly at all :/

Strange thing... he had swiped out my name from our game scoreboard on the whiteboard and had then in huge letters written NO. I feel like that was fighting off an urge to call me.

What now, universe?!