I came to a realization yesterday that the key to being successful in all this IS DESTROYING MY NEGATIVE BELIEFS. They are what create everything (the beginning) and they are also what destroys everything (the end).
 
Negative beliefs are not solely your vibration, but they certainly affect it. You managed to manifest your person once with these negative beliefs in tow, but then they took over your vibration and sent that person away. Thus, you CAN manifest with subconscious beliefs, but you can’t sustain.
 
Knowing this, what’s the point of all this visualizing and whatnot, focusing solely on your person, when you’ll just lose them when you manifest them?
 
I see all these posts on playing sign/synchronicity Where’s Waldo?, and RS tips and visualization processes and it hit me: WHAT’S THE FREAKING POINT?
 
Time and time again it’s said the focus needs to be on you and now I finally get it. It can be hard at first to understand this, because your focus has been on your person for so long, but soon you’ll realize how great this is: you not only get to improve yourself, but you also get your person back. When you keep reminding yourself of this, changing your focus onto yourself becomes all that more exciting.
 
The other day I was thinking about how two of my friends, the happiest guys you could ever meet, had both found out that their significant others cheated on them. How could that be? How did their vibration create that?
 
Then I watched this Abraham Hicks video and it all made sense:
​
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8suW-gOjhk
 
You manifest people who will bring out your limiting beliefs. At first your vibration brings someone into your life and things go smoothly, but then the limiting beliefs kick in. The potential is finally there to overcome them. If you do, then WAHOO you made it and things work out in your favor. However, most if not all of us here on this forum didn’t have this happen. Our limiting beliefs took hold and conquered us.
 
So what happens if we change the story?
 
What happens when we eradicate the limiting beliefs?
 
We can recreate the same vibration we had before, the vibration that attracted that person and can re-attract the same person or better. Only this time, the limiting beliefs won’t be there to stop us from having the ultimate reality we want.
 
I’ll use a personal example:
 
My vibration was “up” when I attracted my guy. However, I still had limiting beliefs, which he brought out completely in me.
 
Ever since I was little I thought I had to be this nerdy writer who locked himself away in his room. I didn’t think I had what it took to be “cool” or to have people like me. When I was little people thought I was gay, which wasn’t associated with being cool or popular or generally accepted. I didn’t have a lot of friends, so I never viewed myself as part of anything. I also never viewed myself as a real “man” because of all of this.
 
One time in fourth grade my best friend was trying to help me and another friend of ours get girlfriends. He had a girlfriend and she was helping us. She went all around the playground asking all the girls if she’d go out with us. She helped my one friend get a gf, but then looked at me and said, “Now for the hard part.”
 
“Now for the hard part.”
 
That stuck with me for so long. I didn’t think I was good enough for girls. I thought I was gay. I thought I was uncool.
 
My parents drilled it into my head that alcohol was bad, drugs were bad, partying was bad, having any type of promiscuous sex was bad. Also, that any type of deviant sex was bad—including gay sex.
 
All of these things solidified in my mind and created these limiting beliefs.
 
In recent years I managed to work through some of these (and now with LOA I know I’ll bust them completely): I’ve accepted that I’m bi, that anyone can drink or smoke, that it isn’t necessarily bad, and that I can still be a fun sociable person while still being a writer. I’ve also accepted that I am good enough to date girls and guys.
 
But these limiting beliefs were still very much in tact before I met my guy. Even though I’d been with guys and girls, I still felt empty when I was with them. Whenever someone great came along, I never felt good enough. Most of the time I felt there was no one out there for me. Even though I partied before, I still felt “undeserving” of drinking and smoking and having fun. Or that behavior is “bad” and I shouldn’t do it. I still felt uncool and unmanly. I found myself attracted to more “manly” men because of this, and I thought it was next to impossible to find homosexual men who fit this description (which in and of itself reflected my own insecurities when it came to my masculinity). As for girls, I still somewhat felt like I wasn’t good enough for them. I hadn’t been with many, and because of that I still questioned whether I was just gay and not bisexual.
 
And then my guy came along. A guy who was cool and manly. Who was bisexual but completely secure with it. A guy who was distant and sometimes cold towards me. A guy who owned his own beer company, and smoked, and partied. A guy who had been with many guys and girls and wasn’t questioning his sexuality. A guy who was “cool” and great and I never felt good enough for.
 
See what I’m getting at here? He was all of my limited beliefs embodied TO A T! He either had one of my limiting beliefs, or had a quality that brought one of these beliefs out in me. My limiting beliefs caused me to destroy things with a guy who would’ve been great for me because I didn’t take the time and effort to quell them.
 
Not that I’m dwelling on any of this. I’m simply presenting this so I can change my story and hopefully others can change theirs.
 
This guy brought out deep-rooted questions in me: Am I good enough? Am I cool enough? Am I manly enough? Is partying bad? What is my true sexuality? Why do I like being hurt so much? Why do I always push people away? Why can’t I attract someone? Why do people always turn away from me? What’s right? What’s wrong? Etc.
 
So, after reading all of this, do you really think my issue lies in searching for signs of my guy coming back to me, or focusing on RS or scripting a perfect scenario where my guy comes back?
 
No.
My issue lies in fixing all the stuff I just wrote about. Fixing me. If that stuff isn’t there, then the story changes.
 
Well, I bet that if you’re reading this you have just the same amount of limiting beliefs as me. Sure, they’re different, but the principle still stands: THESE ARE DEEP ROOTED ISSUES THAT NEED TO BE ADDRESSED.
 
Are you asking why RS isn’t working or why your guy isn’t back or why your vibration will be up for a while only to crash back down?
 
It’s because you aren’t in alignment. And you aren’t in alignment because of your beliefs.
 
I’ve made drastic strides in combatting these beliefs, but I think that’s a topic for a different post. I just wanted to post them here, because hopefully as you read them you go, “wow, you need to work on you TheGiver.” Then hopefully you’ll say “And wow, maybe I need to work on me, too.”
 
Looking for a synchronicity won’t change my fear of not being manly enough.
 
A RS session won’t change my fear of not being good enough for a relationship.
 
A scripting challenge about my guy coming back won’t change my confusion when it comes to what’s right/wrong when it comes to drugs and alcohol.
 
These things might bring my guy back but they won’t stop the situation from happening again.
 
Combatting limiting beliefs is the key to all this.